Balan, the working-class hero of the Foreword chapter in
Singapore Sucks! (the book), sent a letter to his psychiatrist,
complaining about the rotten state of affairs in Singapore Inc.,
the factory helmed by the MM (Manager Mentor).
When I submitted the
manuscript for the Second Edition of Singapore Sucks! (the book) to
my publisher, I suggested that we use a "handwriting" font for
Balan's letter. Because, you know, I want it to look
handwritten.
However, when the printers
are done with it, the font type turned out to be one size smaller
than what I wanted. That is not an issue to younger readers who are
used to reading manga or comics with similar font size, but a
couple of older readers I met at the library complained that they
had to strain their eyes to read Balan's letter in the Foreword
chapter.
Therefore, as a fan
service, I post Balan's letter here. Now you may adjust the font
size as you wish. :-)
Dear Dr. Algernon,
I am Balan. I am a factory worker of Singapore Inc. We
produce all types of electronic stuff including radios and hand
phones.
Recently, I got into big trouble at the factory and I am
worried I may lose my job. I was accused of defamation and
disloyalty and everyone hates me now.
Maybe I should explain.
The factory is run by the MM – Manager Mentor. He was a
senior manager who stayed on past his retirement age and he gave
himself the official title (Manager Mentor) so he can continue to
control factory operations.
Anyway, I would like to say that we factory workers don’t
earn that much. We work very long hours and we make just around
1000 dollars at the end of the month. Life is hard
indeed.
But it is made harder by the MM. Dr. Algernon, our factory
very much depends on foreign investment and almost every week, you
can see the MM showing the “ang moh” investors around, trying to
get them to put in more money.
Based on my observation, I noticed a pattern. Every time
the “ang moh” people praise the factory for its cleanliness or
efficiency, the MM will be very happy. Then very soon, he will make
big changes to the factory. For example, after he was praised by
some “ang moh” people, the MM increased the prices of food in the
canteen. And we found out that we had to pay more money just to use
the toilets in the factory. From free of charge, toilet surcharges
increased to 10 cents and recently, 20 cents.
Now, we also have to pay surcharges when we move from one
point to another within the factory.
When we protested, the MM shouted that since the “ang mohs”
like his leadership, he deserves higher pay and the increased costs
are necessary (to pay for his salary). He also reminded us that
without him, our factory would be some kampong factory, instead of
a first world factory admired by “ang mohs”.
And because of this, the next time an “ang moh” praised our
factory, I denied it loudly. I told the “ang moh” that our factory
sucks and is very lousy so please don’t praise, ok? Why? Because I
was afraid the toilet surcharge will increase to 50 cents and the
costs of food in the canteen will be increased again to pay the MM.
He will surely want more pay because another “ang moh” praised the
factory.
But my co-workers disagreed! When they heard me saying the
factory is lousy, they cursed me for being disloyal to the factory.
But I was not disloyal! I was just so afraid that the MM will
increase costs in the factory again! Our pay will not increase but
the costs of living in the factory will.
But my co-workers told me even if the toilet surcharges
increase to 50 dollars, I should not have said the factory sucks.
They told me I was a disloyal worker.
Dr. Algernon, I am confused. Am I a disloyal worker or just
someone who’s afraid of rocketing costs?
Balan
