this incident has shown two things:
1) there are an increasing group of people who are weak in the
mind, who cannot face obstacles, difficulties without putting on a
brave front. he should sit down and discuss with his parents
properly. i fully understand why his parents want him to join track
and field. even if they insist on their way, there are other ways
to release the stress like listening to music, taking up drama as
"merit cca" or doing it as a hobby and stlil continue with track.
he has shown himself to be mentally weak in making decisions and
even took his own life over a trivial matter. whether the cca case
is an isolated incident has no relation.
2) to take his own life is an extremely selfish act to his
parents. his parents worked hard to nurture him and pinned
expectations on him to become a fine young athlete. he is not
considering his parent's well-being and feelings when he commits
suicide. the fault should not be put on his parents, maybe his
parents have their own reasoning and beliefs as to why he should
join track and field.
there are many more things to life than just choosing your cca.
his priorities in life are not right and he cannot expect
everything in life to go his way.
true, but nowadays singaporean kids have things served to them
on silver platter.. or something like that.. and parents nowadays
also make so many decisions for their kids that the kids become so
'accustomed' to not making decision liao.. here are my thoughts on
points 1 and 2..
1) partly is parents' fault, though cannot fault them entirely.
nowadays parents make decisions for their kids (cos they
over-kiasu), den kids have no say.. well not all parents bahx, but
most are like that. den when the kids say dun want, the parents dun
give them choice, its either do or die.. my mum's lydat larhs.. so
oftentime if someone asks me something whilst i'm with my mum, i
just look at her for answer.. cos if i say yes, she'll tell me why
i should say no. if i say no, she'll tell me why i should say yes.
so how, lydat? den other times, when i say opposite of my mum, cos
i really dun wan something (like if its wasting my time adn money,
and if i already got other things planned), she ask me why im so
rebellious. and all my relatives too. den lydat, i think its better
to keep mouth shut and just suffer in silence. or, if really
bth, just pang seh whatever she signed me up for
lar. its her money what. and i already expressed that i REALLY dun
want, but she dont let me dont want (got such thing arh??). but its
not like i say opposite to spite her lor.. she really give me no
choice until when i get angry, she also angry, so we cold war. den
what happens? all the relatives say i should give in to her, just
do it to humour her or whatever. but all my life i'v been
'humouring' her liao wor, going for
camp/swimming/tennis/speech&drama/church just to make her happy
nehx. nobody knows that inside im crying all the time for being
such a f-ing fool and idiot for not being able to stand up for
something i want/dun want. i sympathise with that boy, since he got
his mum AND dad trying to convince him against what he want..he's
feeling trapped. i think what he did was just spur of moment, cos
if u'r so angry, u wont be able to think logically, rght? so i dont
think he did consider that he's being selfish. after all, he's only
15. and most boys at that age not very mature (not tryign to offend
u guys lar, but this is what i feel)
2) i dont deny he did a selfish thing. but at that moment he
didnt think logically.. so bo bian liaox.. whats done is done..
cannot blame him also.. i guessed that his parents also nv listened
to what he said.. like everytime he open his mouth to say why he
dun like T&F, his parents would just cut in and 'oppose' his
thoughts totally..like that he got no chance to even say that one
(or a few) little things taht bug him about T&F..
that boy's only 15. and as i mentioned he probably wasnt matured
enough mentally.. at that age.. sec sch age.. cca, friends, freedom
are damn important to teens.. they still finding their identity
what.. so i feel it very important to give them space and not
stifle them..not force them to do anythign they dont want (unless
its really really really good for them) let them have space lor.. i
mean.. drama as cca is not bad what.. i duno whats wrong with
that.. not sissy or anything mahx. T&F anyone can join,
provided they train.. but drama not easy mah.. not everyone can do
drama.. duno why the parents nv think of that.. aiyo..
no doubt kids do silly things when they do things on impulse..
but i think it important that parents and kids should sit down adn
hear each other out.. have open minds..not cut the other person's
conversation.. but oftentimes its that both parties dont have open
minds cos they think the other party will always say the
opposite..
