Hello brudder!
You know I can't read chinese to save my life, but i believe I can
still get the gyst of it without reading that passage.
First off, don't miss me, I'm always here. Maybe not always
physically becos I'm always butterflying, but a friend in your
heart is worth more than a million acquaintances beside you. I do
have to apologise that I've haven't been physically around, and
maybe that's what compelled you to post here, which really
surprised me. Nvm, nothing can't be solved over a square table and
148 tiles!!
Next, I would like to let you know that I mostly agree with
Yunhaier on this topic. It would be the same humble advice that I
would be giving you had he not posted above.
However, I wanna add a few things. Actually, I want to ask you a
question.
Do you think that when a man is happy in a relationship, he would
contemplate seeing another woman? I'm not referring to an act of
lust, where it might just be sexual, a fleeting relationship. I'm
referring to letting himself fall in love with another woman, be it
his ex, or another girl.
I believe to answer this question, you have to search deep and ask
yourself if you are a greedy person. Are you a "the grass is
greener on the other side of the fence person"? Are you a "what if"
person? You are not contented with what you have?
From personal experience, when I was in love, and you knew how in
love I was with "her", I NEVER laid eyes on another woman in that
way (lovingly). I felt so empowered by the fact that as a man, I
can finally tell myself this is the most faithful I can ever be to
a woman. You also know that before her, I was a bastard to my
previous gfs.
Basically she managed to capture me, so much so that no other woman
could even come close, and she definitely didn't do it with a chain
and lock! I tell you what, I even surprised myself. No
sh[/i]it.
I do have to tell you that this of course did not happen instantly.
It took time and effort to build this, I dunno what you call it,
"revelation" that you won't look at another woman, that you won't
ask yourself "what if", that you won't look on the other side of
the fence. But once you reach there, you will know.
All this is from personal experience. I don't know if every guy out
there can have the privilege of feeling that kind of peace, but I
do know it exists. I wish that kind of peace for you too, my
friend.
You haven't been with your present gf all that long. And yes, time
isn't the only factor when "rating" the level of a relationship.
However, it seems you haven't reached that stage yet. Whether you
will or not, nobody knows, but at least now you know what you want
to strive for. If you try and try but don't seem to be able to get
Eve out of your head, then maybe the present one is not for you.
I'm talking at PEACE with yourself, dude, this has nothing to do
with anyone else, definitely not the girls in question.
I'm not chastising you for doing something wrong. Hell, I went
through what you did so many times with different girls. But since
I went through that so-called revelation with her, I now know that
if there is a doubt about your relationship with any girl (in this
case, your feelings for your ex is affecting you), it means that
the relationship is not entirely stable yet. That's nothing to be
scared of, we all have to go through this stage.
This may sound pretty abstract to some, and I'm not sure if I'm
expressing myself the way I'd really like, but this is something to
come to terms with PERSONALLY. You want to know that you'll treat
her right, not because you have to, not because you should, not
because you owe it to her, not because you want to, but because
it's the NATURAL thing to do. There is no OTHER way you'd have it,
then to love her, and her only. I tell you, this may be good news
to the girl you love, but I say, it's even better news for you. You
would have sorted it out! You would know what you want!
Of course things can shatter, like it did for me, but that's
another story. I'm focusing on YOU, brother, not them, or her. It's
not about the outcome with your present gf, it's the level of
commitment that you are able to give to your woman. This woman may
or may not be your present gf. Who knows?
So after all that bullshi[/i]t, let me answer my own
question:
If a man is truly happy in a relationship,
would he contemplate seeing another woman?
No way in hell.
So now, you either strive for what I mentioned above, or you
re-assess the situation with your present gf, as in ask yourself,
"Is she the right one?" From what I can see, I think you should
take the first choice, since your relationship with her is still
pretty "young" and it would be wise to give it more time.
One thing is for sure lar, no matter what you do, I'm gonna kick
your ass on the mj table tomorrow! Two words: PAY UP! 
