hpergo SG hey people. I got a Qns to ask. You know when you like someone. You have to tell the person you like that right. But after doing so it makes the friendship awkward feeling. But that occurs if you are rejected. Then comes my problem. How can i like find out the signs that my crush likes me. Cuz i know confessing to her is like taking a risk. Thanks in advance for your help.
babyreyes SG hi hpergo..... yea.....true that the frenship will feel awkward after a failed confession. Its true to certain extent....Cos somehow..will feel paiseh de.... I think different case differnt outcome. It depends on both parties' maturity and how they handle the situation. If ur frenship with him or her is solid strong and both parties strongly cherish the existing frenship, the degree of damage wont be that bad. Tats just based on my own experience. Till now...we are still close frens.....still hang out n chit chat as per normal. just that i do suffer the sadness... Everything comes with a risk. No risk no excitement. And hte usual saying....the bigger the risk..the higher the venture..... the moment u love someone....be prepared to let go of that person when the time comes...... u must know when to hold on..when to let go....... Once u love...love ot hte fullest with no regrets... i think its not tat tough to see if tat person is interested in you... frequent calls... asking you out often.....the gradually from grp to single dates... being attentive to you flirts with you being sweet to you... very considerate towards you give u small surpises... blush when u look into their eyes and wat else .. lo;x////
so_what SG Hey, if u dun try, how u know she dun fancy u? If u r scared, probably ugive her hints 1st..like saying in a joking manner tat wat if she's ur gf..blah blah...if she's not angry, at least u r quite safe...well u really got to a take risk...coz if u wait few mths, i wil say ur chances may be down to none coz if someone act faster than u...i thk u would regret
hpergo SG Thanks for your replies. Yea i totally agree. But it aint so easy. We just met like 2-3 mths ago when poly started. Another reason i'm feeling so unsure is becuz i had this conversation wif her before abt relationships. She said she does not think she's ready to be in one. And she was the one that place that thought of confessions being risky. And its kinda hard to notice if she likes me or not too. Its becuz she's veri socially active. Come on . She hangs around guys. I've only been out wif her 2 times. Together wif my blurness. I dunno how to spot the signs.
walesa SG Surely, these would be more appropriate signs for a girl to spot whether a guy is interested in her? I mean, let's be honest, how many girls would take the initiative to do the above(especially calling or asking you out)?
hpergo SG I think only guys would do that. Girls in s’pore not like that one. i think. After reading what you guys said. I’m still pretty uncertain. But i already asked her out. She kinda agreed. I think.
walesa SG That's what I was about to say. I mean, the other day, I had a conversation with a female colleague who asked me why didn't I ask for her number. So I went, "why can't it be interpreted as you not having asked for my number?" and she went "how improper for a girl to ask for a guy's number!" - I couldn't help wondering what sort of culture this is that a girl wouldn't even dare ask for a guy's(and it's just a working relationship here) number! Seriously, are girls like that worth having for girlfriends or wives?
hpergo SG Yea. I’m gonna tell her soon. How strong can a friendship that started 3 months ago be? I know if you dont do anything , you will regret but if u do tell her and u get rejected. You would still feel much better as she knows. RITE????
walesa SG Same sentiments, exactly. Although she doesn't come across as egotistical, I think she's reserved and passive to a fault. Basically, not girlfriend/wife material for me, definitely. No offence, but it does make me wonder how appropriate it was for another colleague(male) of mine to ram home a point by saying "how can you be romantic to (I think he meant Singaporeans at large)women like that when they're so bloody passive that they're so engrossed in the give-and-take culture - you(men) give, they(women) take"... On 2nd thoughts, the real risk you could be taking could be the aftermath of her saying "yes" to you, rather than having her reject you - I suppose you could start making plans on how you'd like to accomodate a pet if she was the passive sort...
hpergo SG haha.pet.Nice word you used there. Nah. I'm not even sure that she would accept me or not. Its like a 50/50 chance. I dont think my gal is a passive gal. She's so active in everything. But i'll start planning it anyway just in case it turns out well. Agreed man. How can you be romantic to a passive person. Its impossible. Its active vs passive. Passiveness would make u wanna become passive too. Which concludes the fact that its impossible. Haha.
walesa SG No wonder women are complaining guys aren't romantic enough - what they don't realise is, for guys to be romantic, they need to play their part and provide positive affirmation so that guys know what they're doing is right...
hpergo SG yup. Its a 2-way thing. We.guys always get the blame for not being romantic enough. Haha. Just fate. Its a norm i think. Who agrees???
walesa SG Hmm..that perhaps applies more to local women? They expect to be treated in as romantic a manner as their western counterparts, yet they(most anyway) are nowhere close to being as proactive. That said, that invariably triggers a negative cycle in which most men become anything but romantic... and this cycle continues.
babyreyes SG Eeeeeeeeeeeeer......... Im the kind of girl who will take initiative to ask a guy whom im interested in out often de... maybe hte kind of girls u hang out with are different from me... my gal frens are quite bold in expressing their interests de.. like will ask the guy out, call him all these...make things for them to eat.... hehehe..
Bontakun SG I can see most of these boy-girl relationship do not last as the people had hoped. If only we can love not because of what we desire, but what we can give to them…...
