Gedanken, my apologies for taking
a long break, as duties called and had to be attended to. It has
been interesting that our views seems to co-incide up to the point
where we get closer to understand the cause of this seemingly
innocuous incident that has now been elevated to the point of
"typical ( ? )
Singaporean Rudeness" and "basic racial
ineptitude".
Originally posted by Gedanken:
Original post by Atobe:
The fact that X-Man had
responded in the manner he did confirms my suspicion to this entire
sorry episode as I have stated; and this is drawn from X-Man's reported remarks -
"I don't have to bow down to
you" - that was probably made in direct response to Buxton's
body language, voice tone and pitch.
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That's conjecture, Atobe. Given that X-man already demonstrated a
lack of manners, it is also entirely possible that he could have
reacted in a hostile and manner to a situation that didn't call for
it. There's nothing that conclusively shows that Buxton was acting
superior, even though we of course cannot exclude that
possibility.
"Conjecture"
depends too much on guess work, which is not the case with my
statement made based on the purported remarks attributed to
X-Man -
"I don't have to bow down
to you".
This purported retort was supposedly made as a response to Buxton's
seemingly audacious move in demanding a "Thank You" from
X-Man for
the door that was held opened by Buxton.
Granted X-Man was
"seemingly" rude by not
indicating his appreciation as perceived by Buxton
- but we do not know the facts of the situation that transpired at
that point in time - when both passed each other when the door was
held open by Buxton. This is the critical moment, when something
happened - eye contact or body language - caused Buxton to make his
move, to chase X-Man and demanded a
"Thank You" 
If someone was to pursue you for an apology to an unknown "slight" that
is seemingly insignificant to you, there are two possible ways in
responding - (1) the petulant childlike response as you have stated
of X-Man
resulting in his negative reaction to the perceived insolence of
Buxton; (2) a more humourously sophisticated reply that can either
be genuine, or pushed saguine sarcasm".
Original post by Gedanken:
Original post by Atobe:
What about X-Man's side of
this sorry episode ?
The fact that Buxton would make a 'mountain out of a molehill'
towards X-Man's
unresponsiveness to an uncomplimented courteous effort from Buxton
probably shook X-Man up
more then necessarily.
I am not making any excuse for X-Man, as I would have felt shocked
that someone will run after me, to elicit an acknowlegement of
thanks for something which I thought my unexpressed appreciation
was known to such a kind gesture and effort made - by someone who
probably have done it as second nature without demanding
acknowledgment in return.
It was definitely not Buxton's "You're welcome" remark that was the
deciding factor, but it was Buxton's direct up-the-face
confrontation with X-Man
over a very small issue.
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I disagree, Atobe. X-man could have acted in a mature manner and
acknowledged his mistake, but instead he acted like a petulant
child and escalated the matter, to the extent that even after
disengaging from Buxton, he came back and started things all over
again.
The petulance in X-Man was probably
aroused by the indignant feelings at the seemingly audacious and
ridiculous move by Buxton in publicly pursuirng for a "Thank You".
The manner in which Buxton had broached his demand is only drawn
from his printed statement, and we do not know the actual circumstances that transpired -
the body language, the language used, the tone and pitch of voice
applied in his demand - which led to X-Man's retort :
"I don't have to bow to
you".
How else do we explain the arousing of the ire and indignant
feelings in X-Man - in reaction
to Buxton's actions or reactions to an incident that in
X-Man's
view was totally insignificant.
Could it not be perceived by X-Man that Buxton was
spoiling for a fight in pushing for a "Thank You" ?
I would have left it at that - if X-Man had ignored my
goodwill gesture.
Even if I was in X-Man's shoes and had
simply accepted the unsolicited goodwill gesture from Buxton - (or
from anyone keeping the door open for me to follow through ) - and
did not express my gratitude (not even with a nod or a smile, let
alone a verbal acknowledgement), I would certainly be surprised and
embarrassed, if someone would chase after me, demand a gesture of
expressed appreciation, and made with an overbearing tone of
teaching me some etiquette.
My reaction will be as spelled out in the two possible ways as
stated in the preceding reply.
Quoted by Gedanken:
Originally posted by
Atobe:
By writing to the ST Forum, is Buxton perhaps seeking redress in
gaining public sympathy in which he felt peeved with the outcome of
an unfinished confrontation ?
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Perhaps, but it's equally possible that he is simply pointing out a
social issue that he sees for for the public to pay attention
to.
We will never know, as this time
it will depend on conjecture of his unstated thoughts buried in his
own consciousness or otherwise.
Continued below
