I really envy my good friend!

Troy437 SG

Have a colleague friend whom I knew for the past 10 years. Same age as me and we really click well.
We have worked together for years and became close. I even helped out at his wedding. His wife is very capable, studied and got a degree and eventually earned more than him. Both managed their marriage very well.
I saw him became a father and now he is a father of two recently.
Saw him changed to car a few times from old Daihatsu to the current Honda Civic now.
He going to buy a Executive Mansion flat or a condo.
I got my promotion ahead of him only becoz of my seniority.
He is a person of strong character and can act calmly in stressful situation. He knows when to relax and he can put work down without worrying. My bosses all like him. And he is going for promotion interview for senior management post next year.

I have never been jealous of him and I in fact....I really really envy him. Looking at my life and comparing to him, I feel like such a loser. Neutral
My wife is a quitter and dun contribute financially at all in our life.
I can't handle stress as well as him. My bosses dun like me as much as him.
I have no ambition to get a bigger house and I have no ambition to be senior management. and I keep worrying about my work.
Can only envy him....

mystee SG

it seemed like u are comparing urself and him, whether is wife, career, house, capabilities...

1st, pls dont compare abt wife, u choose her as ur wife in the 1st place. so treat her nicely n dun compare with theirs' wifes. is not being fair to her.

how do u noe he is not envy of u? he may be striving so hard.. becos his wife is earning more than him. he have to work harder to show he is capable.

2nd, handling of stress... y dun u buy some books on managing stress and read on it. it really help somehow or another.

3rd, if u have no ambition of getting a bigger hse, no ambition to be senior... then dun compare urself and him. if u hv no ambition of materalistic stuff, live a simple life and be happy for wat u have.

Troy437 SG

You got a point there.

But its natural in him that he can cope in any situation and think about the solution. I would usually waste some time dwelling on the problem then think about the solution.

But I beat him in physical activities. He can't run fast or far, while I can. Wink

the Bear SG

be positive, be thankful for the good things in your life, and do the best you can Wink

and work on the things you think are lacking in your life..

be well Very Happy

FireIce SG

tong ren bu tong ming

some things cannot compare one lah....
ren bi ren, qi si ren

im sure he oso envy u for some things......

sometimes u jus think loh.......if u are relli in tt person's shoes, will u be happy? are these relli wat u want?

wuming78 SG

hm..

its only natural that we compare with the people around us.

and again, its also only natural that we tend to notice or emphasise the points where we somehow fall short in comparison. natural cos if we always compare and think we are in great position, we will stagnate.

so such comparisons will spur us on and drive us ahead.

but sometimes we do have to think about those points which we are in fact in better position - they may be so natural to us that we are taking them for granted. or we may simply be too harsh on ourselves.

but yeah, its hard. we will always think "how i wish i can be like him when it comes to ... ...".

then the thing to do is to think about how that can materialise and act, rather than just stopping at the "how i wish" state.

yuko-ogura SG

hmm..i also. Neutral

alwaes dwelling on stuff that i shldn't have spent time on...wasting precious time. Rolling Eyes

dragg SG

how old is your colleague?

frankly, it is too early to tell.

SevenEleven SG

learn to be contented and you will be happy. there is always the jia jia you peng nan nian de jing.

having a wife who is more capable then you may not be a blessing. just be happy with what you have and work hard for yourself
Laughing

mystee SG

i know is easy to say n hard to implement it. But i alwys feel that everyones have their own talents and capabilities. it takes time for ones to realise it. So "try" and not compare with others as it will only make ourselves feel bad, with low morale. But if it help to motivate us to strive further, it will be good. but if not, y not just do our best in whatever we can, and have no regret. Smile

matleep SG

There is this emperor who had everything that anyone wishes for and rule over a huge empire. He then ask one person who was perceive as a wise guy, Who is the luckiest person in this world. Well, emperor was expecting an answer to be him. But this wise guy cite a few examples but the emperor's name was never included.

Reason was very simple. You don't look at what a person has now to determine if he is the most fortunate person. You look at his whole life. Meaning you can assess a person only after he has die. Well, the emperor lose all his empire later in his life and become a slave.

Bontakun SG

The only thing you have to envy of is your own life. How are you going to leave your mark for others to see and perhaps model after?

poon cho tang SG

envy? no time for that Laughing

ditzy SG

But but but you just recently got yourself a brand new car. Laughing

Troy437 SG

Not just a new car...a new car at a very good deal!
I just found out his Honda Civic is $800++ monthly instalment for 10 years.
My car installment is $682 for 7 years. Wah I save a lot... Mr. Green