Hi, I've been surfing this forum for quite some time as guest
and frequent the Aunt Agony section. So, I decided to post my
problem here. Maybe you guys can give me some suggestions or
advices? It will be good to hear more advices to reflect on
myself.
One of my biggest problems are being too gentle and obedient ...
as I'm told and I will be taken advantage of in the work force. I
was actually quite shocked when I kept hearing people saying that I
am too gentle because I didn't really think of it. But thinking
about it, it's quite true since I really did grown up like that ...
I've always been a good kid, very well behaved, never scold people
before, considerate and polite according to most of the testimonial
I got from my teachers even though I am not academically inclined
so I don't fall in that good kid = good result category.
Unlike them, I work in a ordinary work force which is the
retail sector. But then, i'm not ignorant of what goes on in
the world, nor would i call myself a really innocent guy, but
people are telling me i have to toughen up in order not to get
taken advantage of ... However, I don't know how? My mum was mad at me when I say it's okay to
be obedient what.
When talking about that issue, I don't know is it because I
always have that mind set since young so I don't mind doing more
works since it will be beneficial to me by letting me learn more
things in the progress ... I don't know ...
but if I don't get
works to do or purposely go and eat snake, I'll feel guilty since I
am taking the salary from the company and I think I should make use
of the time to do my job properly which probably makes people think that I am a
easy target for bullying?
So ... is this a bad thing?
Obedient simply means you obey, without question. You don't
question means you either trust the persons giving the instructions
or you are under authority or you don't know what to question.
there is no such thing as too obedient When we were young, we
obeyed because we don't know enough to question our parents and
teachers. in the army, we don't question because there are
confidential info behind the orders so we have to trust the wisdom
of those giving the orders. Anywhere else, you have to really think
before you follow. Obedience is not a virtue without thinking.
Gentleness is a manner or quality of being kind and amiable,
moderate, not rough or violent. A quality which many people lacks
in this rat race society. You can give a negative answer gentling
which will help the recipient to swallow. So if you think first and
then put forward your opinion gentling, that is good. If you don't
think, what is the use of being gentle?
When you do not speak against the evil when you should, you are
guilty of being the evil colaborator.
When you do not speak for the good of all when you should, you
are guilty of being selfish.
When you do not fight against oppression, you are weak.
When you allowed yourself to be taken advantaged of, you are
stupid.
When you don't know what to do, its time you start thinking,
talk to your close friends, your colleagues, your siblings...
When your mom is mad at you for listening to rubbish and act
without questions, think it is time you start thinking.
If kindness, gentleness, honesty, ....are virtues, we can only
see that there are not enough in our society, never too much.
