AT WORK WITH JOYCE TEO
How to identify a workplace
bully
It's not just a tough boss, but one who
gets a kick out of demeaning other people
MANY of us would have encountered a colleague with a heightened
sense of power who gets a real kick out of demeaning others - the
workplace bully, in other words.
There may just be such a jerk or two lurking in your
workplace, waiting to sap the chosen few of their energy and
motivation, while making their lives miserable.
Clearly, such people have serious self-esteem
problems.
The bully "needs to dominate and cause hurt in order to
feel in control", said Dr Elizabeth Nair, lead psychologist and
chief executive of Singapore-based Work and Health
Psychologists.
"Actually unsure of his own self-worth, he tries to
establish this with such behaviour that seeks to put down another
person," she added.
These bullies may have been "victims" previously, and are
now trying to assume the "powerful" role.
It is worth noting what Professor Robert Sutton, an
organisational psychologist at Stanford University, once said: "The
best test of a person's character is how he or she treats those
with less power."
Lest you think the jerks are always someone else, Prof
Sutton said it could be any one of us.
Research shows that people change overnight when they are
put in positions of power. The result: a newly minted jerk.
"They start talking more, taking what they want for
themselves, ignoring what other people say or want, ignoring how
less powerful people react to their behaviour, acting more rudely,
and generallytreating any situation or person as a means for
satisfying their own needs," Prof Sutton has said previously.
So it pays to be mindful of your actions. But how do you
know you are actually being bullied at work?
Your boss may have just yelled at you, and you feel
victimised. But that does not necessarily constitute bullying.
"The first step is to differentiate a 'tough management
style' from 'bullying'," said Ms Deepali Chaturvedi, head of
South-east Asia operations at Reed Specialist Recruitment.
"In Asia, a tough and demanding management style is
commonly seen and accepted as a standard way to manage subordinates
and improve their performance."
But, she added: "Bullying by nature is malicious, with no
positive outcome for either the perpetrator or the recipient, and
as such should never be tolerated."
Professor Dennis Driscoll, who was invited by Fuji Xerox
to give a talk here in July on corporate social responsibility,
noted: "Workplace bullying refers to persistent, hostile behaviour
against a worker, usually by someone in a more superior
position."
These bullies do not just target everyone; they choose
who to attack.
The easy prey are the ones who are not in a position to
retaliate. They are more likely isolated - physically, socially or
emotionally, said Dr Nair.
Threats or insults may be dispensed freely, and there may
be unwelcome teasing or social isolation when you find yourself
excluded from a gathering.
You may be being bullied if, for instance, your boss is
always finding fault with you despite you having delivered well, or
he schedules last-minute meetings on the days when he knows you
have to pick up the children.
"Bullying can also take the form of humiliation through
such things as the imposition of impossible work deadlines or the
allocation of meaningless tasks," said Prof Driscoll.
If you are being targeted by a workplace bully, you will
know it, because the wound it causes is not just skin-deep. You
will feel down, may lose your appetite, and your health may even be
affected.
"Job-related effects can range from lower job
satisfaction and work productivity, to increased counterproductive
work behaviour and intentions to quit the job," said Dr Sandy Lim,
assistant professor of management and organisation at the National
University of Singapore Business School.
Bullying is also likely to have a negative impact on the
victims' mental and physical health.
They may take more sick leave, for example, and these
negative effects can also spill over to the employees' personal or
family life, she said.
Workplace bullying is obviously unacceptable, and needs to be
stopped.
This is the first article in a two-part
series on workplace bullying. Next week, we will touch on how to
deal with the office bully.
Money, The Straits Times,Monday, September 10 2012, Pg B10
AT WORK WITH JOYCE TEO
Dealing with workplace
bullying
Don't suffer in silence as being bullied
can take a toll on one's health
MANY victims of bullying suffer in silence or alone, afraid that
if they speak up, they may lose their much-needed jobs.
Being bullied is no joke as it can take a toll on your
health. Something needs to be done.
Singapore does not have any legislation specifically
covering workplace bullying.
But if you encounter unfair treatment or feel threatened,
says the Tripartite Alliance for Fair Employment Practices (Tafep),
you can approach your supervisor, human resource department or
union for advice and assistance.
(Not all experts recommend these options, however.)
"If the threat involves physical harm, the employee
should consider making a police report," says a Tafep
spokesman.
And if the bully is the supervisor, the employee may want
to bring up the matter with someone more senior or approach the
Ministry of Manpower (MOM) for advice and assistance, he says.
Reed Specialist Recruitment head of South-east Asia
operations Deepali Chaturvedi thinks you should meet your boss
behind closed doors and highlight how specific incidents have made
you feel threatened.
If this fails, your next step could be to approach a
neutral party such as a senior HR member and seek his advice, she
says.
Of course, companies also have a part to play. Mr John
Harris, the Asia Pacific HR head at Alexander Mann Solutions, says
they should have clear guidelines on what constitutes bullying -
frequently overlooked in the workplace.
"Have an escalation or feedback process available for
people who feel they've been bullied.
"Be open to feedback about bullying (that is, HR needs to
ensure it knows how to manage the research and background
process)."
MOM also advises employers to "provide grievances
procedures to enable their employees to raise concerns or report
workplace problems, including unfair or unreasonable treatment, so
that such problems could be effectively addressed", says a
spokesman.
Mr Harris says confronting the bully is not helpful. To
him, mediation, which should be part of the interaction process
with HR, is the best way to deal with workplace bullying. And it is
not a solo effort. His advice is to get independent witnesses or
observers who can provide feedback about the situation and how it
occurs.
"If it is genuinely bullying, then there are processes,
corrections or interventions which need to occur to change that
person's behaviour," says Mr Harris.
Depending on the situation, some may still choose to
confront the bully head-on.
But for many, this can be difficult. Dr Gary Namie,
founder of the US-based Workplace Bullying Institute, has said that
a lot of people who are targeted can't fight back as they don't
have it in them.
Confronting the bully also brings with it a fear of
retaliation. The alternative, he has said, is to involve human
resources, a higher manager or an outside advocate, such as a
consultant or lawyer, and make sure you document the abuse. Also,
gather data about the economic impact the bully has had on the
employer.
A recent blog entry on the advocacy group's website says
that before people who are bullied search the Internet for
"workplace bullying", they tend to make two common mistakes. "They
report the misconduct to HR and they tell their bully's boss. The
sequence varies, but relief coming from one or both sources is
rare."
The reason: The bully-boss relationship gets in the way.
"Veteran bullies know how to ingratiate themselves with... people
in authority so they will be seen in a positive light."
Plus, "you are bringing bad news about someone considered
indispensable".
The other problem with telling the bully's boss is that
he simply does not know what to do. Often, the answer will be:
"Work it out between yourselves."
"This is wrong-headed. Managers... are ducking
responsibility by trying to make victims solve the problem they
neither deserved nor invited," says the blog entry.
"The bully's bosses are afraid of emotion-charged
interactions and worry about the messiness of it all."
Doing nothing makes the bully's boss an accomplice.
Here are other steps you can take, says Dr Elizabeth
Nair, lead psychologist and chief executive of Singapore-based Work
and Health Psychologists:
• Find friends at work you
can relate to informally, so you will not be completely isolated
socially and emotionally at the workplace.
• Talk to your friends during
permitted breaks such as lunchtime. (Use your mobile phone so you
will not be accused of using the office phone for personal use.)
Have lunch with them if you can so that it is clear you do have
friends of your own.
• Try to ignore unpleasant
behaviour. "Paying attention to bad behaviour is rewarding for the
bully and encourages him to repeat it again," says Dr Nair.
According to the Workplace Bullying Institute's website,
victims should expose the bully but also have an escape route
planned as "good employers purge bullies, most promote them".
So, you may want to consider leaving the company,
especially if it is a small one, for the sake of your health.
Says Ms Chaturvedi: "If the organisation culture supports
or rewards bullying, then you have to seriously consider if this
environment is right for you."
If you choose to leave, the institute's advice is to
still expose the bully, not so much to get him fired but more for
the sake of your mental health.
"Targets who skulk away in silence, shrouded in personal
shame, suffer the most," it says on its website. "It can take a
year or more to rebound to the point of being able to seek work.
Those who leave proudly bounce back the fastest."
This is the last instalment of a two-part
series on workplace bullying.
Money, The Straits Times, September 2012 17, Pg B10
