Constant Conflicts With Wife Over Housework & Finance

last SG · 2012-02-28T15:18:21+00:00

Men vs Women again. Round 528756476243924014675489969896452.

auditor SG

My friend already in his 30s - very desperate - he tells me age is catching up. Bo Bian. So he marry anyway. He thought he could change her in the course of marriage. But he was wrong - she is still the same bitch.

The girl - look a bit ok but short in size and very bitchy.

How to find new one? My friend has been trying to find date for 10 years ! He go everwhere, date co-workers, go pub to find life partner and ask friend for recommendation. Everytime kena rejected and then my friend kena dump by women many time.

In my country - chinese are getting extinct becuase chinese women are becoming so particular (want perfect husband).

I know one chinese guy who converted to religion that I don't wanna say. He got 4 kids and two wives. Some more at office - nobody likes him because he acts like a 10 year old - throw tantrum and never cooperate. He is abusive and slap his children - i once heard him do it when i called him on the cellphone - i heard him slapping and verbally abuse his kids with bad words. Some more at office he show third finger and scream bad words at us.

I am amazed that women of the religion he married to - can still choose this guy. Maybe one thing good about the religion is it teaches the women to respect the husbands. But I don't want to go thru circumsicion and i don't want to fast one month in a year and i love eating pork.

But chinese guys in my country - no chinese woman wants. So we chinese are getting extinct. We only number 6 million in my country of 27 million. In 1960s we used to make up 40% of the population.

wah lao a. There are so many young and beautiful and gentle woman from vietnam, malaysia etc to chose mah.

Ask him to go to any marriage agency to chose lah.

speakoutfor SG

You which country?

A country situated near Singapore.

One third of your nation's population consists of my countrymen and countrywomen who fled the race and religious suffocation and lack of career, schooling and government job opportunities afforded to the chinese of my country.

A country that has many similarities with yours - food, culture, religion and race. The only difference is that we are slowed down by the lack of transparent government system which seems to only favor one race and make the chinese a second class citizen. Red tape is prevalent in my country. Inefficiency, lack of teamwork and tidak apa attitude is also prevalent.

I read so many complains about PAP and inflation. You people should be glad. In my nation our education system has been reduced to toddler level education to help rural students to increase their passing rate.

mancha SG

Women win = 2393994944949494949494949494993228219

Men win = 29

Women and Men draw = 398485955500035

Solved = 0

speakoutfor SG

Solved = 0

Or is it?

Solved = -13944095059055050394494 to the power of 3930595509505

L0gica-Nuts SG

A country situated near Singapore.

Suspense for what ,say malaysia la, the guy , convert to muslims right since the majority.

kengkia SG

The girl - look a bit ok but short in size and very bitchy.

In my country - chinese are getting extinct becuase chinese women are becoming so particular (want perfect husband).

But chinese guys in my country - no chinese woman wants. So we chinese are getting extinct. We only number 6 million in my country of 27 million. In 1960s we used to make up 40% of the population.

from your last sentence, should be malaysia.

auditor SG

A country situated near Singapore.

You should have told your friend to go to marriage agency look for a young, pretty and gentle vietnamese bride instead of marrying that bitch just because no other girls like him

kengkia SG

You should have told your friend to go to marriage agency look for a young, pretty and gentle vietnamese bride instead of marrying that bitch just because no other girls like him

u think malaysia is like singapore ah, suka suka can get PR and citizenship?

jojobeach SG

who are you? a psychiatrist or psychologist?

even if you are, you can acurrately diagnosed people's problems in a forum eh.

Must you be never lived on your own before lah.

2 people in a house only, how messy can the place be ?

The most is do housework every once a week. No need do the whole house at once. One portion at a time. Is more than sufficient to keep a neat and clean home.

We are Asians, we don't wear our outdoor shoes into the house like Ang mohs do.

Nowadays got washing machine and dryer, dish washer and other electrical appliances to make your life easier.

Not like last time.. our grandma have to wash clothes with her hands and clean the floor with a bucket and water.

If TS is not a clean freak ( OCD ) .. then he must be a slave driver.. marry a maid better !

This why mothers always tell daughters.. never marry a pauper. Not only he cannot provide you a good life.. he expect you to become his FREE maid.

TS never look at his own weakness.. he only complain about his wife's misgivings.

He already very lucky his wife willing to marry a poor shit like him.. yet he come here complain she lazy... that girl also is si bei suay !

jojobeach SG

You should have told your friend to go to marriage agency look for a young, pretty and gentle vietnamese bride instead of marrying that bitch just because no other girls like him

You really think gentle brides will marry any Singaporean Tom Dick and Harry ?

They also hope to find someone who can provide and treat her well.

Darkness_hacker99 SG

Hi, I am 33 and just got married to my wife (same age). Lately we have been having tiffs about housework and finance. She just started working part-time and earns about $1K.I am holding 2 sales jobs, fetching about $3K per month.

I have been feeling flustered as she is not keen to keep the home clean. I have to come home to clean the house even after a really tiring work day.

Financially I also feel drained as I need to pay for our house-loans and many bills and expenses. I am not even sure if we could afford to have kids in future.

My wife became very upset when I told her to chip in, in our home expenses. She is still not into housework and she can't cook.We cannot afford a maid at this moment.

I love her yet I am feeling very frustrated about her messiness and unwillingness to help me lower down household expenses.

What shall I do? Divorce is never an option to me.

Please feel free to drop in your opinion.Thank you.

Good luck to you bro, this is just the tip of the iceberg

auditor SG

and why is divorce never an option to TS?

Because he cannot bear to give half of his assets to the wife?

speakoutfor SG

Suspense for what ,say malaysia la, the guy , convert to muslims right since the majority.

I ashame to acknowledge. We just cancelled Erika Badu concert. I can't believe it. We are the butt of all jokes.

speakoutfor SG

u think malaysia is like singapore ah, suka suka can get PR and citizenship?

Yes if you are chinese very hard to get PR. But a lot of singaporean m-people can get PR in my country.

A lot of elderly chinese who were born before 1957 - without valid birth cert got their citizenship annuled. Therefore they cannot own land - cannot travel - cannot work.

I got one friend who married a vietnamese - she only get a visitor pass and have to renew every year. Unless she is Indon muslim - she will never get citizenship.

5 years back - I watch the news in shock - a group of Indon muslims got shot dead outside a bank apparently trying to rob it - it turns out they are PR holders. Then also another case an Indon muslim was caught molesting an underage girl - another PR holder.

Whereas, I know a chinese couple who adopted a kid from Philipinnes. He attended International Bacalaurete in private school - top results. Gahmen refuse to give him citizenship.

speakoutfor SG

You should have told your friend to go to marriage agency look for a young, pretty and gentle vietnamese bride instead of marrying that bitch just because no other girls like him

There are many cases in my country whereby elderly man try to buy brides from vietnam but most brides ran away back to vietnam.

One case: A 35 year old man paid $20,000 for a vietnamese bride but she turn out to be an ex army officer in viet cong army who know martial art. She began to physical beat him up and abuse him. Then she ran away. The 35 year old man had to go to a famous mediator in my country name Michael Chong. The viet cong officer lady came back and met with press to declare that they "amicably" ask for break up.

Second case: A 50 year old man married a 23 year old viet cong girl. She refuse to sleep with him and made him sleep in the living room. Got language problem. After 4 months - she ran away back to her village. The 50 year old man went to her village to persuade her come back - but was beaten up by her fellow villagers. Turn out that the 23 year old viet com girl already have a 23 year old lover cum husband in vietnam before she married him.

So the 50 year old man ask marriage agency for refund. No refund they say.

So you stil reckon viet cong bride strategy can work?

elindra SG

I have been feeling flustered as she is not keen to keep the home clean. I have to come home to clean the house even after a really tiring work day.

Financially I also feel drained as I need to pay for our house-loans and many bills and expenses. I am not even sure if we could afford to have kids in future.

My wife became very upset when I told her to chip in, in our home expenses. She is still not into housework and she can't cook.We cannot afford a maid at this moment.

I love her yet I am feeling very frustrated about her messiness and unwillingness to help me lower down household expenses.

What shall I do? Divorce is never an option to me.

Please feel free to drop in your opinion.Thank you.

TS, can I know why is your wife only working part time? Is she unable to find a full time job?

What about setting time aside during weekends where both of you clean the house together? Make it a joint thing or set up a schedule where both take turns to do certain things. If she is messy, set up a corner in the house where she can keep her mess and turn a blind eye to it. At least the mess will only be confined to a corner of the house.

I think I know why your wife is upset that you want her to chip in. $1,000 is really peanuts in Singapore. Assuming she spends about $100 in transport every month, she only have $900 left. Are you paying for her phone bills? If not her own mobile phone charges, insurance if any, and stuff that most women need like haircuts, creams and lotions, clothes all add up. She will also need to give her own parents money and have some savings.

Are you giving her any spending money? If not, I think you should not whine about her $1,000.

I think a rough breakdown of expenses she needs

Transport $100
Bills (insurance, phone etc) $200
Money to parents $200
Savings $200
Haircut a month $ 30
Cosmetics & creams etc $100

She will only have $170 left for food and other stuff.

Personally, I cannot survive on $1,000 a month. Then again, I earn more than her and my husband don't give me money.

Fatum SG

(1) sounds like a statement from a cynic that I've read before, and (2) is going to end in tears when one party does the housework all the time and is taken for granted. The peace won't last for long.

*ahem .....

that's how ours works ....

it helps to have a good wifey ...

Fatum SG

That is so stupid it barely warrants a response. What you have just described is a recipe for disaster for men.

don't you intend to share in the housework too ? ....

it's simply practical too ... whoever's home early and sees the laundry piled up to be done would do it ....whoever's free enough to wash the toilet and feed the pets would do it ...

if you choose to split hairs and keep a mental list of who's been doing more of the house work and who's paying more of the bills then you're just sowing bad feelings and cracks into the marriage ...

I-like-flings(m) SG

There are many cases in my country whereby elderly man try to buy brides from vietnam but most brides ran away back to vietnam.

So the 50 year old man ask marriage agency for refund. No refund they say.

So you stil reckon viet cong bride strategy can work?

i saw an ad in china b4... RMB200,000 buy a vietnam bride .. guarantee 1 yr wont run away and confirm is virgin.... now i know why...

kengkia SG

i saw an ad in china b4... RMB200,000 buy a vietnam bride .. guarantee 1 yr wont run away and confirm is virgin.... now i know why...

why?

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