People are unfriendly towards me

Ptolemydian SG

I hate it. I get depressed every time I face unfriendly people.

I am not going to keep quiet anymore. I used to let go but when i go back home or go to sleep I get a mental attack - as if I am not respected as a person. What should I do?

Eg of rude incident:

1) In my department, all the people would leave office and say bye to each other but never to me (with exception of one or two). Why? I have tried to be friendly to them.

2) I was never close to my cousins. But on one day CNY, usually when all the relatives gather at granny's house, the cousins will go into a room and start to chat or play card games. Last time, I never join them but this time I decided to go in. Moment I get in, all of them got out ! THen i tried to chat to a cousin but she keeps on looking at her watch. Without hesitation, she left without even saying excuse me. So rude !

3) I had a tiff with a former friend due to some past incident. One day we all group of friends came out for gathering, after the gathering he said goodbye to everybody, patted everbody's back but refuse to bid goodbye to me. So rude !

4) Before I left - I wave bye to a colleague - he never wave back.

My answer:

1) Tell them off, "why you don't say goodbye to me? We are a team !"

2) Complain to my uncles about these cousins. Tell them that once their generation is over, we will never be united as a family because these cousins are not friendly.

3) Back stab that friend complain about him to common friend. Then call him personally and flame him

4) Complain to others about this rude colleague. I believe the reason is because I had to do my job due to this colleague have a really bad subordinate who didn't perform the job and I had to write an email to the big boss and complain about him.

QX179R SG

are you in anyway related to this fellow..

http://sgforums.com/forums/3765/topics/447646?page=1

Sky_Blue223 SG

Look at your answer.

That would explain why the 4 various situations would arise.

FireIce SG

i think u shd look at it from another angle.

Veggie Bao SG

It's so strange and unnatural.........

It has never happened to me before....

Usually the other people would respond if I say hello or goodbye.....and I would also respond if someone say hello or goodbye to me....

Have you been having problems with them previously...?

Aneslayer SG

@TS,

Respect can only be given and can never be recieved... Its like charity in that essence. Why does everyone get that wrong?

Why do anyone need to be respected? Btw... Poor manners has nothing to do with respect.

Perfection cannot exist objectively. Nothing is perfect. There are no reason that you may be, so don't expect people to be like it.

Lokey SG

@TS

I think you need to join a religion.

Why does it even bother you in the first place?

Simplemindsg SG

Some people no matter how nice they try to be, indeed they will find themselves in your situations at times. Perhaps, they are very good people inside them, but just do not have the physical charisma. When you face a situation of such a rejection when being nice, think that the other party didn't have a pleasant day at that time:)

ahRichard SG

things happen for a reason, and while all of us don't know you personally... the fault may just lies on you

take out your

and you will get the ans

Rock^Star SG

You sure it's a department and not a primary school? Because it seems you are living in denial, as if the whole world owes you something. This is precisely the reason why you never get along with many.

angel7030 SG

Hi,

For this type of problem, you can consult my Uncle Hitman, you sound like him, PM him and he will tell you how to overcome it.

Thank you

Gerberad SG

in my opinion , there's no use complaining here. life still goes on even though people are unfriendly to u or u have no friends.

look at it from another perspective, if it comes to climbing the corporate ladder getting promotions and salary raise, do u think they will be friendly to each other??

if u are really so bitter about it, then i suggest u work hard and surpass them in life. when they come to u for help in future, 'play' with them. :)

Bio-Hawk SG

I hate it. I get depressed every time I face unfriendly people.

I am not going to keep quiet anymore. I used to let go but when i go back home or go to sleep I get a mental attack - as if I am not respected as a person. What should I do?

Eg of rude incident:

1) In my department, all the people would leave office and say bye to each other but never to me (with exception of one or two). Why? I have tried to be friendly to them.

4) Before I left - I wave bye to a colleague - he never wave back.

My answer:

1) Tell them off, "why you don't say goodbye to me? We are a team !"

2) Complain to my uncles about these cousins. Tell them that once their generation is over, we will never be united as a family because these cousins are not friendly.

3) Back stab that friend complain about him to common friend. Then call him personally and flame him

You need some lessons on personality. What you project about yourself might ot be the best. Find some one charismatic and see how they are doing so good.

Read 'How to win friends and influence people?' by dale carnege.

troublemaker2005 SG

I hate it. I get depressed every time I face unfriendly people.

I am not going to keep quiet anymore. I used to let go but when i go back home or go to sleep I get a mental attack - as if I am not respected as a person. What should I do?

Eg of rude incident:

1) In my department, all the people would leave office and say bye to each other but never to me (with exception of one or two). Why? I have tried to be friendly to them.

4) Before I left - I wave bye to a colleague - he never wave back.

My answer:

1) Tell them off, "why you don't say goodbye to me? We are a team !"

2) Complain to my uncles about these cousins. Tell them that once their generation is over, we will never be united as a family because these cousins are not friendly.

3) Back stab that friend complain about him to common friend. Then call him personally and flame him

all humans are like that one - if you not happy, please next life don;t be rebordn as a human being. now ki suggest you go drink a cup of hot milk, piss and slp.

Toiletries SG

Woah, I don't want to wave at people or talk to people, but they will still come up to me to chit chat. What a nuisance!

Okay TS, I think I'm rude here but the situation may arise because either you're actually someone noone likes [Because you backstab, wayang and tattle] or because of your past impression on them, such as if you're too quiet, too boring or too honest/naive/good that it makes them not want to be associated with you. You could also be disgusting, fat, ungroomed or unfashionable in your image.

The point is, since you cannot mend the situation, perhaps changing your image/behaviour/perception on others towards a much more positive side. Then people will naturally want and come to you.

Regarding feeling let down from their attitudes, it's natural to feel sad and hurt but don't focus on these emotions as they will do you no good. Do things that you enjoy when you've finished work, let your mind wander towards happy thoughts. Go shopping if you like, or pick up a hobby/activity. Even watching TV is great to de-stress. Dwelling on the negative thoughts will only make you bitter, lose sleep and result in depression and dreading the start of each day.

This is of course my opinion only..

PS: NOT SAYING ANYTHING BUT IF YOU'RE A FAT GUY, STILL OKAY, GOT CHANCE, CAN MAKE FRIENDS ONE, NO PROBLEM. IF FAT GIRL, A BIT HARDER, NEED TO BE OUTGOING AND FUN BUT NOT OVERBEARING PLS.

Summer hill SG

er chill leh.

last time i also faced this when i was primary 1, everyone don't quite like me, becos i "nice gal". when i was p4, i was quite brash and i became popular girl.

now, i sec 2, average girl

DailyFreeGames.com SG

if 1 man say i look like a donkey, i will knnbccb that guy... if 2 different person says i look like a donkey, i will keep quiet... if 3 different person says i look like donkey, then i will start looking at the mirror... if 4 different person says i look like donkey, i better start "eee hor eee hor" like a donkey.

speakoutfor SG

Way of the world. In the corporate world - people are impersonal. What to do? Sure within climbing the corporate ladder amongst backstabbers, rude people and opportunists - there are friends that you can find even if it means one or two out of a 100.

angel7030 SG

and if the 5 different person says you look like a donkey, you better go Bedok R for a walk