Hi there, I would really appreciate any advices from any couple
who are maybe involved in Muslim-Christian relationship or best if
Singaporean-Malay and Filipino couple?
I met my Singaporean-Malay bf through a common friend 9 months ago
in a Malay birthday party. I never really intended to date or never
really fantasized Muslim guys or even Malay guys in general though
90% of my friends are Malay girls. I am an open minded person but
brought up in a society with hardcore Christian faith but respects
and connected with my Malay friends really well.
Anyways, since the first time we set eyes on each other it was
like a magnet. I really thought it was just casual dating, after
all I wasn’t really interested in a serious relationship back then.
But he became so persistent, he invite me all the time for dates,
dinners, movies, walks, bring me to his football games, some more
we have similar Malay circle of friends who welcomed us to be a
pair. Physically he is not the typical Malay looking guy. He’s 31,
mixed-Arab (mom) and Singaporean-Malay (dad). So appearance-wise,
he is one of those guys you can say WOW on
the first glance and I’m also not a typical Filipino looking girl,
29, I can camouflage around Chinese women. Anyways, to cut the
story short………. We got very close, and became bf and gf eventually
and now turning 8 months.
At first, differences in food and religion never entered my
brain until lately when we are getting really serious – serious
meaning we say I LOVE YOU’s to each other and
start talking about life forever, marriage, children and all that.
He cannot eat pork obviously and I cannot bring him to church every
Sunday although he said he wouldn’t mind to go try one day. I am
just confused. It’s as if I couldn’t love him fully…. Imagine a
scenario when we sit over a dinner, I do my sign of cross and say
my “Our Father” as my grace and he say his grace his own way while
acting like washing his face after praying. During Fridays, I have
to leave him in my room for an hour because I’d pray my rosary and
he would also be away from many times because he would pray in a
silent corner.
Is dating with a Malay guy a good choice or I am making a mistake?
It would hurt me to back out but if I had to, I would. I met his
brother and sister but scared to meet his parents so I always
insist to delay meeting his parents.
We talked about religion and even argued about it because I made
it a big deal. I know my family back home would really say
something when they find out but I’m sure they would agree
eventually as long as I will remain Christian. What about his Malay
family? I’m sure his parents would be against it. I am very frank
and straight when I told him, I will never give up my Christian
belief in the event we’d really get to that situation. I am scared
to lose him but scared to lose my identity as well.
He is a wonderful person, he showed me passion and going out
with him is awesome we can talk about anything under the sun… I
even love when he speaks Malay around his other fellows and we’re
learning each others’ languages… but I am scared about our
differences. Any advice?
