Something wrong with me?

last SG · 2011-09-22T08:17:50+00:00

Ts, One carries what is alway witin oneself. Let me exemplify – one cannot put lemon in a juicer and expect some other juice. That seems to be your predicame...

Igor12 SG

Hi people out there. I think I'm in trouble. Though it took me 39 years to realize it. It seems I got a problem keeping friends. Just realize I have never celebrate my birthday with anybody except with my wife. Seriously doubt my co-workers know or want to know my birthday. I alway felt I can't fit in. Neither with the pub-going, smoking guys, or with the studious guys in my poly days. So in the end, I'm always alone. Now in working life, I also don't know how to fit in with them. Things got worse since I got promoted. Just realize how bad it is just now when I saw video they post going out with older guys who join the company later then me. So it must be something wrong with me, right?I think I need to see a shrink or something. Going to join SPCA as a volunteer as it is something I always enjoy, cause the dogs and cats there are always happy to see you. I seriously don't know whats wrong with me. Needs some help here. Actually I don't know am I posting in the right place or not.

Fugazzi SG

Self-consciousness is a dis-ease! In other words, what others think of u and utter about u is so very important but one does not realize one’s predicament. There is nothing outside of onself that can fix it cos it emanates from within onself.

When one is unable to relate to oneself (warts and all) or unaccepting of oneself, it is nigh impossible for another to accept what one is!

Igor12 SG

But the thing is I am not self-conscious. In fact, I never give a sh#t of what any body say of me, except people I held close to, that would be my wife and my mum. If I have to be bother with every comment anybody say of me, I would be living my life their way, not mine. In fact, I think I doing this too well until I became invisible.

Fugazzi SG

Ts – I alway felt I can’t fit in – why? That is something that calls for self-honesty. many are not willing to see the lack within oneself or are unreconciled to baggages within – both emotional n psychological.
Most of us try to find ourselves in others and reject antying or anyone that does not resonate of us (within) or add to the sense of self.

Ghjfghdft SG

Rooney9 SG

just be yourself and do the things you enjoy. you can heck care the views of others. You need to understand, you are only accountable to yourself only and no one else. you doesnt owe anyone a living or explanation on your behaviours.

I have heard this humorous joke, share with you. when you begin to turn 40 or 50, you heck care what other people think or say of you. when you begin to reach 60, you realised that nobody seem to care or say about you anyway.

Igor12 SG

I’m reading ur stuff now… Trying to indentify my baggages as the way you put it. I’m lost. Do I really need to see a shrink? I honesty want to turn my life around. I don’t want to die a lonely sad old man. Thing is, Whenever I go out with my friends, I feel like I need to conform to their ways of, talking trash, or girl ogling or drinking. It’s not me, I would feel faky if I do that. I would lose myself. Whenever, I go out in a group, I tend to keep quiet. I felt it’s safer. Till the point that I feel going out with friends or not is the same.

Rooney9 SG

what u need to do is relax and dun worry. you worry too much, period. you are suffering mentally and emotionally, for nothing. you can choose to be happy or sad, or miserable or feel good. the choice is yours to take.

Igor12 SG

Rooney: your joke is my fear. And you got no idea the things I worry about. I got three boss riding my back everyday. I’m not exactly a healthy guy, I got health issues. My wife listen but she ain’t the best solution provider, & I socially isolated. If not for my wife & mum, I don’t know my life is for who.

Rooney9 SG

you mean we dun have problems of our own and is problem free at the moment? even the rich as their own problems and headache.

Igor12 SG

I’m a dialysis patient. SGH is almost like my second home. 12 years. & I almost die one night 4 years ago. I can’t quit my job as I need it to pay for my med. My boss knows it & that’s why they know they can ride me as hard as they like cos I can’t quit my job. I serious doubt your problem is like mine.

CannyOng SG

Look at the bright side. Somebody dont even have a wife and ridden with illness....

While you still have wife beside you..

Rooney9 SG

well, will thinking about it improve your present situation? ya you are sick physically, but you are not sick mentally are you? as for your job, you still have a choice ie start looking for other jobs and dun leave without one. apply until you finally found one if your boss does not appreciate you at work.

Rooney9 SG

I heard that when K Sri Dhammananda( a monk in Malaysia in his 80s), who passed away a few years back, was told by his oncologist that he had cancer, he started laughing about it. his doctor was taken aback by his attitude, as most of his cancer patients, when told that they had cancer, either broke down, worried sick or depressed.

Fugazzi SG

Muse over this – the enemy that rages within oneself will always look for anything, anyone to justify one’s feelings!

Angie.azurebluesky SG

If I am you, I be happy for what I have and not to bother jelousy other ppl can mix around. its a personality problem that you can't just turn the leaf overnight. Either you are in it or you are not. Some ppl are born to be chatterbox but thinking yourself being a not is a sickening thing, just be who you are and mix with the right group of ppl you be at ease then forcing your butt around.

Igor12 SG

Cannyong: yeah, u r right. She is the only right thing in my life. That’s why I live for her.
Rooney9: when I reach 80 years of age & my doc tells me I got what I have now, I would laugh too.

Aneslayer SG

Perhaps I dunno both sides of the story, but I know relationships are more than 2 sided.

Don't try to conform to the norm since you are not. Nothing from the rest has satisfy you why worry about it now?

If you feel somewhat deprived or missing out, I suggest you do something to mend the relationship.

Ghjfghdft SG

Igor12 SG

I think we have steptrack some where. I’m fine with being a kidney patient. Life deals you all kind of shit and I got the long end of it. I’m fine with it. & its not the issue here, my issue is I wonder why I am always walking alone on sat with no friends. Can’t be the whole world got problem, so it had to be me somehow. Just couldn’t ….pin the point if you know what I mean.
Rooney: thinking doesn’t solve the problem for my social issue, that’s why I’m trying to figure it out. That’s why I’m asking for advises here.
Angie azurebluesky: it’s the right group I can’t find.