I’m 21 this year and I have never been in a relationship
before.
Just a few months back, for the first time, I have a guy who is
interested in me. He made his intentions clear to me and I did let
him know that I was interested as well. However, right from the
start, he has been very inconsistent. He likes to do what I call
the disappearance act.
Because we are school mates, we do see each other in school now
and then. He will only maintain his contact with me for a while
after we meet. For example, we would see each other on Monday
because we have a common lecture then we would hang out with our
clique for lunch. Then he would message me or msn me that night and
maybe we would still message till Tuesday. And if our timetables
are such that we dont meet till next monday, He wouldnt contact me
at all till the next time we meet.
I guess the point I’m trying to make is that he doesnt make the
extra effort to stay in contact? He will only let circumstances
coincide with our meeting times. He wouldnt message or msn me or
anything and I’m supposed to pretend everything’s normal when we
next meet by circumstance while for the past week I will be left
hanging and wondering if he is still interested or even serious
about me.
i know I dont have much experience but I thought the least I
could expect from him would be an sms to let me know what he’s up
to at least to ask how im doing? Am I just being insecure or is
this just normal expectations?
I would love to message him whenever I feel like it but I hold
back because I feel like he wont reciprocate. That he will mind my
messaging because maybe this is something that he doesnt like to
do. i dont know if he doesnt message because it simply doesnt cross
his mind or because he’s waiting for me too.
If circumstance dictates that we will never meet, i think he
will never bother to contact me at all. what’s this? Is this
normal? Are interested guys supposed to message/bug the girl every
day or every few days or am I just insecure??
First of all, this is normal in courtships or maybe half baked
ones. Contact, then no contact, then contact again. He may have
other options. You should keep your mind open too, he may not be
THE ONE. If he messages you, good. If not, don't fret. You will
have other suitors? Then when you finally end up with one, let the
fella lick his wounds for not trying hard enough. It's
alright....courtships in schools are but mere games sometimes.