frankly speaking i think no one's at fault. I want to get my
kids attention, the maid is just doing her job and the attachment
between the maid and my children just came about with time...
I'll be more than willing to make effort to communicate with
them but looks like there's already a formidable barrier between my
kids and I. Can someone enlighten me on how to do it subtly such
that there's a win-win situation?
You know the problem. Work on it.
Human relationship barriers should not be demolished, but
chipped away.
The children are young and therefore easily attaches themselves
to the caregiver easily. This also happens in the animal world
where the young of a species is adopted by the mother of
another.
It is never too late to start reclaiming your children, although
the earlier the better. And yes, do it subtly. Put a smile to their
hearts in the morning before you and your husband leaves for work,
and again when you return home. Praises works wonders. I bet the
maid is doing that, praising them and nuturing them. She probably
has natural talent for that. Yes, its not her fault.
As you have thought out the strategies at the work front, to
establish yourselves in your careers, you now must think out the
strategies at the home front.
Besides the starters, plan for the evenings and holidays. Don't
be mechanical, think what would your children like, treat them like
young adults, let them make decisions fearlessly. They are hesitant
with you, because you represent the authority. You need to become
the friend. But do not pamper them and spoil them. Do not try to
buy your way to them. Read up on spending quality time with your
children, and decide whats best for you. Only you and your husband
know your children well.
You, your husband, and the maid (you have a good maid
there) can bring up the children together.
Parenting is about bringing up children, and then releasing them
to the world.