I regretted being such a loser back in sec life, not making
friends. Until i realized all your good friends will actually come
from, during your sec sch life. In poly/ns/worklife, ppl will hang
out wif their friends after sch/work. Reflected back, I may change
for the better, for my own good. But, i still will be alone. Tried
going for some forum outing once, make friends, but realized they
are just some ppl with a bit of attitude problem, don’t like to
talk, talk with no link ..etc. Though i may still hav a couple of
good friends, but we can’t be lik in the past. Ppl hav their own
path to walk, busy own stuff. I faced .. alone during festivals,
dining alone, shop for stuffs alone etc. But then i do stay
positive & healthy, go jogging myself, visit llibrary read
book. How can i make my own social life better?
Having read your post, I realized your regrets stemmed from
loneliness.
Well, you wont find any answer in front of your computer. A
thousand good advices can be found, but a thousand discarded,
simply because it requires an action, of which you are
NOT ready to take actively.
It can quite comfortable to hide in the shell of your room, with
a cup of coffee, and stare into the computer, read some articles,
play some games, etc. It is all so passive and it is within your
control at the click of a button.
You need not go out under the weather, spend money and time,
facing crowds and queues, interacting with people, pleasing others
and being pleased, etc. In this shell of existance, you find
comfort and solace, and bemoan your loneliness to any who would
hear.
However, only you alone can find and make that decision to get
out of your comfort zone, and do what must be done to enrich your
life, not just materially, but spiritually as well ( i dont mean
just religion alone).
One bad encounter does not mean ALL encounters will be bad.
Friendships and trust need time to build, just as during our
naive and innocent schooldays, which has its ups and downs, but
fortunate that we see our friends or foe everyday, to make the
changes necessary to adjust to our comfort level of
interaction.
Shut down the computer. Turn it off and weaned yourself out of
computer. Go out instead to the real world and make friends. Lessen
your dependence on the computer as an extension of yourself to
others - it never works for you are just another faceless jumble of
text. Meet real people through games, activities or social work. It
is not that difficult, really. A genuine smile from the lips
as well as the eyes at another is all it takes to know another
person, followed up by an invitation for coffee or a meal together
to get to know one another better, men or women.
Cheers and good luck.