Hello people. this thing has been bothering me for quite
sometime.. It goes like this... I'm the youngest at home
and i have a super ill- tempered sister. not only ill -
tempered but also controlling me. Such as having
the " before
12am curfew" and she intrude my privacy by
peeping into my handphone all the time.. when i disobey
her such as going home after 12am , she will just go
crazy and start to whack me up. all the kicks, slaps and
scratches. FYI, she is small in size around 40kg?
while i'm a basketball player. I did not punch her
in the face but instead push her aside. After all. i respect her as
a sister.
Next, She dislike my bf because i used to have alot
of quarreling issues with him. however, now we've sort
things out and are happier than before. But
then she continued to be very rude to him and also wanting me
to leave him. Even on the day when my grandma passed away,
she Insists that he cannot come and pay respect to
my grandma and even give excuses saying things like grandma
dont wanna see him either. She just want things in her
way. she'll never know how the others feel.
Now, She create an issue for me and my bf. And it's
affecting us alot more. She even want to confiscate my phone
so that i cannot contact anyone. I believe that you guys will
be wondering where are my parent and what's
their reaction.Well, My parent is more relax on me and
they always shield me from her vicious attack. And and
and i'm 20 this yr.. i feel so uneasy with this life.
hai..
Hi CfCJ,
Try as you might, there are times when it's impossible to
sustain positive relationships with everyone in our lives, be it
friends, lovers or even siblings and your closest kin. Taking a
step back and mellowing out may work on some but not on chronic
bullies.
I agree with Mancha for the most part. If you've tried hard
enough to maintain good sisterly terms and she isn't reciprocal,
it's time to stand up for yourself. I'm also in favour of distance
from people who are destructive. Blood relation, at times, are
merely accidental DNA. Don't go through your days burdened by
this.
Are there reasons for her to treat you badly? For instance,
sibling rivalry? Are you the favoured child? Tried getting second
opinion from your folks?
If you're not quite sure if she means well or she's just pure
malice, use your gut. You'll be fine as you get older and as you
slowly come to live your own life and learn how to discern between
good and bad intentions.
Chinese families are usually full of dramas, especially families
filled with women folk. Imho, they're almost always the shit
stirrers. Me thinks it's prolly the estrogen at work.
Next time she lay her hands on you again, be civil, but tell her
you're going to have to defend yourself with force.
This kind of sister usually won't believe you and she'll provoke
you with a second attempt. Since you sound like a bit of a softie,
don't feel bad about it when the moment comes. Give her a decent
wallop and show her you're no pushover.
Unless her anger has a life threatening effect on you, imho,
threatening her with a police report is just overused shit stirring
method. If and when you do decide to use this measure, be sure to
follow up with real action. People take you seriously when you mean
what you say. They learn how to treat you with respect when your
word counts. It's ugly business but some times it's necessary for
your lot in life.
No matter how bad it gets, just remember that she's the
unfortunate combination here with immaturity, excessive anger and
emotional difficulties. And she's most likely going to carry it
forward in other aspects of her own life. Time will show many
qualities in everyone of us. Don't lose your cool the way she
does.
Ride it out till she gets married. Then continue to keep a
distance until she shows signs of remorse.
Just my two cents worth. Take care of yourself babe.
