Originally posted by Yuki~!:
Dear AA,
I'm 16 this year and I've been attached to my bf for almost a year
now
I think that he's no good for me but I just can't say no to
him.
[b]1. He distracts me from my studies
He doesn't really encourage me to study. Even when my very
important O levels were nearing, we often quarrel because I wanted
to study and he wouldn't let me because he didn't want to end our
phone conversation. For that, my studies has gone down the drain. I
just wish he could be a little more supportive. I hate to quarrel
with him.
2. He constantly spends my money
He's always broke & always asking me to pay for things, saying
that "Money is meant to be spent". He would plead with me to lend
him money & I ALWAYS give it to him. & He almost never
returns the money I lend him. I spent more than a $1000 on him last
year.
3. He ABUSES me
He verbally abuses me. When we fight, he would scold me vulgarities
(eg: calling me a f***ing b****) and humiliate me, if he got the
chance. When I told him I want to break up with him, he would
threaten me, saying that "he would make my life hell". He also
threatened to tell my dirty secrets to the world.
4. He's ruining his own future
He's retained in Secondary 3 for the 2nd time this year. I, as a
girlfriend, feel a little ashamed when my friends asks me why my
boyfriend is 17 and still in school. He constantly skips school
(& tells me to do so too, sometimes). I try to tuition him and
wake him up every morning to make sure he goes to school but my
efforts usually goes to waste when I get his report book. I mean,
if he wants to marry me in the future (that's what he claims), how
on earth can he support me?
5. He's violent & bad-tempered
I'm afraid to make him really, very angry. I mean, he gets angry
over the most ridiculous things. There was this one time, during a
fight, he pushed me & I fell backwards. I cried my eyes out but
he didn't give a damn. Several times he used sharp objects to scare
me so that I give in to our little argument, eg: Beer bottle &
razor
I feel very lost as I really have a lot of feelings for this guy.
But he really bullies me. In short, he is a delinquent & I know
I have become one, too, under his influence. But I want to change
because it's a new year & I want to go to Poly to start things
fresh.
How can I say no to this guy who's still is Sec 3 this year &
isn't at the same level of thinking as me? Is there any way I can
turn him around? See the way I see things? I feel that if I break
up with him, I'll regret because I love him a lot. He told me many
times that he really loves me a lot. But why do I feel otherwise?
Please help 
[/b]
Bf are only temp.
You can change bf anytime you want but u cannot change your school
result.
School Result is forever !!
You are a smart gal and you should know what to do. I was like you
once and neglected my studies in the early years due to
relationship. In the end I had to study extra hard to get back the
lost time.
Love so what. It does not give you, your monthly salary to live in
this cruel world. Results are the only ticket to a better life.
What happens if a better gal comes along and he runs off? Your love
and effort will come to nothing.
Lets do this test.
If he loves you ask him to change if not he is just using you for
his own needs thats all.
