Her reaction was lukewarm, which makes me realise how little i
meant to her. No point continuing this one sided "relationship",
building up my expectations alone and face major disappointment
when she leaves. 
The forumers are right, I should have talked to her a long time ago
about this to see how she really felt abt me. I should have stopped
clinging so desperately to her and cheapening myself (no commitment
relationship) just to have a chance with her. Better to wait for
"true love" to come along than waste time/effort in this "fcked up
love".