TS, you should be paying more attention to your self-esteem than
the reasons as to why your Bf isn't "protecting" you as much as you
think he should.
What you need to know is this:
Healthy Self-images do not bruise easily.
It is a well-known psychological fact that the
people who become offended the easiest have the lowest
self-esteem.
We are hurt by things we conceive of as threats to our ego or
self-esteem.
The person who has little or no self-reliance, who feels
emotionally dependent on others, makes herself most vulnerable to
emotional hurts.
What you need to do is to build up your self-esteem, get a better
and more adequate self-image of yourself so that you will not feel
threatened by every chance remark or innocent act.
A big strong person does not feel threatened by a small danger but
a weak little person does. In the same way a healthy strong
self-image does not feel itself threatened by any offhand
remark.
When a person has adequate self-esteem, little slights offer NO
threat at all and they are simply passed over and ignored.
Be bigger than such things. Have bigger fish to fry, as the saying
goes.
The person in hot pursuit of meaningful, rewarding goals and a
calendar of important things to do has little time to obsess over
trival slights and offenses.
Most dumb, insensitive remarks are just dumb,insentive remarks -
they have no hidden meaning and searching for it and being offended
by it - is an utter waste of time.
Don waste your time dwelling on them - you should just forgive and
forget and move on.
Speaking of which,
The most effective method, and the 1st step you ought to take, to
eliminate guilty feelings and reactions is to forgive.
It is perhaps the most powerful and practical principle ever taught
to build happiness, health, prosperity and wonderful relationship
with others.
The inability to forgive lies at the root of guilt, resentment and
most other negative emotions. The refusal to forgive just one
person can be in itself enough to undermine or even destroy your
future happiness.
You don't have to like the person. You just have
to forgive her. Forgiveness is a perfectly selfish act. It has
nothing to do with the other person, it has to do with your own
peace of mind, your happiness, your own success and your own
future.
Perhaps the dumbest thing in the world is for you to still be angry
or resentful toward a person who doesn't care about you at
all.
So for the sake of your own health and happiness, learn to
unconditionally forgive every single person in your life who has
ever hurt you in any way.
That is the smart thing to do.
Remember,
To be wronged or robbed, is
nothing unless you continue to remember it.
