Depressed bf

lemonlight SG

...

darkhour SG

wow...its been hard on u eh?im not sure if this will work, but i feel u shld tell him how u feel as well...not its like u keep taking in all the loneliness n stuff...even if he is stressed, i believe u do haf ur own problems as well...one can only take so much, understand that NS is always a hard period for a relationship to endure thru, hold on to him, but at the same time, tell him that ur energy is not limitless...there is a limit to everyone's ability...

since he is visitin a psychologist soon, lets juz hope he wuld b better later on...

ispyyy SG

Man can sometimes be very selfish in sharing emotions... They sometimes failed to understand tat without sharing his problems to his love ones actually hurt his love ones...

U should try to open up his heart not because he want to... U should try to open up his heart because u want to... Coz, end of the day, u want to understand and share his problem and thus he can return back to normal...

Sometimes, guy cover his heart with a barrier tat reject their love one's love... Sometimes, u just need to forcefully inject yr feelings to his heart thru the barrier... It will melt his heart 1... He maybe appear an iron man from the outside but actually, he is hurting from the inside...

Kind of sad being a man ,rite??? Not like gals, emotions flow like tap water flowing... >< When, the water run dry, they r ok liao...

LazerLordz SG

Do you and him have any mutual friends who are also serving in the same place?

parn SG

Simple enough, why not go about with your own lives and wait for him to contact you first instead?

I know as much as you wanted to meet up with him, there's very little to what you can do to help his depression/situation. He probably needs some time alone by himself and without your presence to focus on his own problems.

Another reason in doing so is to observe if he is willing to watch and allow this relationship to die away slowly and quietly. If he does, there's bound to be a reason behind it other than a mere depression caused by National Service.

By right you should be in his thoughts. but as you have mentioned...it isn't happening.

Is there anything more that you should be revealing to us about? If not, I don't think anyone can possible fill up the missing gap in your story and help you better.

Good Luck.

Jimi_Goh SG

What a loser sissy boy...forget about him. This is part and parcel in the life of a Singaporean male. Very Happy

lemonlight SG

ichi87 SG

im in my NS now... but i dun haf a gf... but i can see my friend struggling to maintain a relationship wif his girl...
my friend was something similar to ur bf... he does not go out except.. going out on fridays wif us... when we asked why he does not bring his girl along.. he juz replied... Friday is for the Guy's Night...
after playing a long night on friday... saturday.. he just slept for the whole day.. maybe woke up at night.. but still.. lazy to go out mah...
Sunday??? preparing to go back at Night.. where got mood to go out again??? see... the onli time u can sms him is on Sunday... dun sms him on other days.. becos he might not haf the time to look at his hp at all...

jlzk SG

Hey.Gal jia you jia you .You gotta be strong to keep the relationship going.Try to understand him dont too stress out i am sure things will get better.!ALL THE BEST!

Jimi_Goh SG

lemonlight> forget about him. pm me your number.....i can make u feel better and make up for lost time. Very Happy

caleb_chiang SG

After reading TS's posts... I really find that her bf is really having some serious nerve breakdown...

It is not normal for an attached NS guy not wanting to meet his girlfriend for every chance that he get. No matter how depress or how bad things in camp can get, normally they would still want to go out no matter how bad shaped or tired they are.

Possible reason would be he is having a serious depression. So bad that he just wanted to be alone. If TS is really serious in this relationship or really concerned about him, she should actually make the effort as in not just contacting him and asking whether they should meet up. Take the initiative to go over and meet him up.

Although that the result might not be what you or we would think of... but it would still worth the try if TS is really serious in the relationship or even just concern about him. I guess that TS would not want to regret not doing so even if she really don't like him anymore after she found out that he had done something stupid.

Another possibility that another forumite had posted... kena raped... Laughing

Possible... thus explained the drifting apart from friends, family and girlfriend...

Another possibility that not really exist... Change of sex perference... he realised that he like guys...

No matter what the possibilities are... I believe that TS should have a heart felt talk with her bf. Wink

kerts SG

hi lemonlight,

jus send him a msg telling him tat u'll be there for him, let u know if anything, n if he needs someone to talk to, or a shoulder, feel free to let u know. Love u.

dun sms him anymore for 1 wk

boredtulan SG

mebbe he looked at the photos of his bunk mates gfs on their lockers, saw what he missed out, and got depressed...... Mr. Green

de_middle SG

hey jimi, its easier said then done telling TS to leave the guy.

Leaving him at this point may be good for him & it might not even be. So sounding an immediate break-up will send him into possible suiside in the worst case senario. Just do the cooling off style would be a better alternative.

Hey TS, my suggestion is......slowly chill off......just let him be & move on with ur life, keep urself busy & take him off ur mind.

If he doesn't call, let it be....you have already done all that u can possibly do to tell him ur there but he refuses to open up.

So take care Smile

lemonlight SG

de_middle SG

let me tell u, 5 days later it'll still be the same.....u need to keep urself occupied with other things for now Smile

ispyyy SG

since u have made yr choice in waiting, then, wait happily...
No use worry or stress...
Coz, one day, u will blow...

RonDaGuy SG

Simple. Tell him to read this topic you made.

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