Jojobeach, you sound very much like a real romantic and that is
very rare.
Actually, I'm more of a practical.
And I don't let a man lead me around on a leash strung through my
nose, well, not anymore. Now, I'd rather do the leashing... or
lashing.
The trick is, knowing exactly what you want, then go get it.
Even if you don't get what you want, at least you know you've
tried.
So no more wondering and daydreaming, or getting drunk on
margaritas ,spacing out at the guy who always seems to look like Mr
Mysterious while you're high on alcohol.... yah, silly me... here,
you can borrow my mirror.
Just some thoughts from the back of my head. I don't think Mr G
wants a relationship though that is what he claims. Maybe he wants
one but he doesn't really need one with me. Things seemed to
transpire in reverse order. Most of us claim a r/s before or
shortly after physical intimacy, for Mr G it happens after 2 years.
Maybe he orchestrated this mistrust. Maybe I did.
Physical intimacy does not equals relationship. You and Mr
G, you call THAT a relationship ?????? it's a mutual s e x ual
exchange at best. No, I take it back, it's a s ex ua l
relationship.
Shifting it from first gear to 3rd gear will take some hard revving
on your end.
If that old flubber ain't gonna burn, the wheel ain't turning, the
piece of rocket junk ain't going nowhere.
The logical part of me believes he's spewing whatever he thinks can
ensure contact when he comes back. It comes across as very cheesy.
He has been spewing for a long time now. Apart from sex I cannot
think of better reason why a person like him will bother. I also
don't understand why he has to be this desperate / shrewd. That's
why I'm curious for male perspective. Is it really desperation? Do
people really stoop to that?
He's doing what he's doing for a long time, because it worked on
you.
So yes, it's logical he continues to behave in such a manner.
Don't undermine your own ability to control the situation.
It's ultimately up to you, to decide if you want to play his
game.
You want to find out the truth ? Abstain s e x with him.
See if he's gonna shrivel up like a raisin?
If your suspicion is true, that s e x is the driving force behind
his repeated contact with venus. You'd know Mars is up to noooo
good, end of guessing game.
I have no idea why he needs to be this desperate because I find him
attractive and he gives me nightmares. What I don't understand is
why he chose to leave without bidding goodbye, then contacts me
again and apologises voluntarily. I wasn't riled up to begin with,
I didn't probe. I didn't instigate anything. Close friend of mine
says I am not being appreciative that he bothered feeling bad over
going away. I would like to be nice and responsive but something
tells me he is just being a phoney. When I respond sometimes he
becomes distant and says things like please take good care of
yourself and cheers. Sort of like he is regretting the conversation
big time and just trying to be rid of me.
Well, all too familiar.
The only good guess I have is. He wants to be "chased". He wants
you to initiate. He wants you to let him know how important he is
to you. He wants to know he's God's gift to you... wait.. you ARE
the woman, right ?
I hope he's not working in a bank........spooky
Asking him all these questions is not going to cut because he will
just be quiet. I don't think he needs these questions now anyway.
When he does try explaining, the atmosphere gets so unbearably
heavy I feel bad over it and have no choice but to cut him in and
make a joke to lighten things up again. But when I try a joke to
lighten things up, he turns frigid and looks very offended. When I
get the feeling he is offended there's pretty much nothing I can do
except to shut up. When he's offended he says nothing does nothing.
It is very unapproachable and very scary to me.
Why are you so afraid of him ? Are you afraid of rejection?
I had the impression you are a go getter, the new modern woman, one
who knows what she wants and would give up everything to get it.
What happened to Miss Confidence... ? He ain't gonna bite you girl,
he eats and sleep and poop like you and I do.
Apart from that, I like him for his company and miss him when he's
not around. But when he isn't around I'd rather not talk on the
phone or on the net because he's very boring and awkward.
When you have a relationship long enough, your mate WILL
become boring and awkward on the phone or internet. Yah... so.. no
biggie.
I want to tell him honestly it's better that we not talk and just
meet up and go about the usual routine when he comes back, clear
the air so he doesn't have to try so I don't have to be mislead.
But if he really ignores me I'll feel terrible and unhappy. At the
same time I don't want to be hurtful. He remembers harmless
comments sometimes, shows no reaction and then brings it up 3
months later. What I say can come back to haunt me.
That's because you don't know what you want, yet.
Hun, you're letting him be the biatch, you need to get a man who IS
a man. Not someone who dangles a piece of flesh in between his legs
and calls it a diak when he wants to.
Can't seem to find a one stop kick buttock solution to my
frustration and insanity so I would like someone clever to just
tell me what it is so I can do right by it.
Someone clever ain't gonna help you girl, YOU need to be
the smartie
I just want to know if I am being excessively cynical or if I
should go with what my gut says.
So what exactly is your gut telling you ? Are you even
listening ?
Finally, if you can't change his path to collide into yours, drop
him. Move on, that's what courtship is about, you try them out, if
they don't fit. GET ANOTHER ONE.
