Of Failed Marriages & 'Me'

Yunhaier SG

Don't let a chaotic domestic environment tie you down. Seriously.

It's insane trying to enlighten people, who have been vastly tainted repeatedly over a long stretch of time, learning twisted version of love from negative sources - the very source that they reckoned as 'reality'.

These 'realities' knitted and form part of their core beliefs - which will mimic the underlying elements of the negative sources which they first model after, resulting a bottomless pit cycle.

To lift from this curse, one has to dug deep into their soul and learn to understand their own psyche. Though we can't change our external environment, but surely we could do something about ourselves. And as we amend ourselves, we subtly affect and influence our external environment and gradually our destiny changes.

Don't get draggled by the negative stories of failed marriage and relationship. Instead, speak to couples with successful relationship and uncover their secret. Idea

Cheers

bladez87 SG

my parents are also together because of me and my sis.

then my family got 0 bonding totally. the only way we communicate is thru quarrels previously. now i just dont talk to them unless needed.

and somehow or rather, i developed a very lonewolf character. friendships very few. prefer to keep to myself. dont like crowds ba. sometimes i envy those who always have a big clique to hang out with. then i think back what for hang out and waste so much time when i can do stuff that i like, namely gaming lol.

romance wise, kinda despo. yearning for the feeling of someone to love and care for and to receive in return without the shoutings and quarrels. maybe is not that someone that i yearn for but the feelings ma.

ya i also envy those family with very strong bonds. i dont know how to talk to my parents. is like the action of talking doesnt exist.

BadzMaro SG

Well , look at the bright side. At least its an experience we can learn from it. I mean my sisters learns a different lesson from it , so did my older bro ,me.. i used to hate my parents. Then slowly, as u grow u realise , u start to think , well.. at least they loved us.. or commited in thier relationship to make sure we did our best. N at least me n my siblings didnt turn out to be fuked up ppl.

But then again , makes u wonder , to be happy in the future , or to continue ur parents legacy n forsake ur own happiness. mmmm~ Both my parents are workaholics. I remember they used to try to out do or buy our loyalties with material stuffs.. Laughing come to think of it , its like having double ang pow... or double the money.

Hardly see my parents , except my maid. Since young , been transferred here and there to live with mum or dad. THen got thrown overseas alone. Hell i hardly even knows my siblings! Come to think of it , i am only close to my older bro n sis cause we have similiar incidents. But they are doing way better then me. N i have decided to forsake my own happiness to try to better things with my parents. Did i make teh right choice ? Maybe~ maybe not. BUt i can only say whatever path i chose it has given me different experiences.

anyways i think i of topic just wanna rant~ how i feel.

viciouskitty74 SG

When the family elders cannot display good relationship management. Look for mentors.

It may be a old teacher that you knew, or someone you can really respect.

Listening too much to those who bemoans their failed relationships is like sticking to toxic friends, that influences you into too negative a thinking.

I look to my mentors and their down to earth grounded experiences with their wives. Especially one, that nurses his sick with cancer wife for 13 years before she died, with now 3 grown up scholars son that is my age.

You may find better examples with the older folks then those around your age group.

viciouskitty74 SG

Always remember.

No matter how hard it is. Your parents still loves you.

bladez87 SG

to be frank. i kinda hate my parents. it is a love?/hate relationship i share with them. sigh.

soulwinner SG

Hi mookie.. i believed that it’s not hard to locate a broken family in sg. My parents almost divorce beacuse of family violent. I witnessed my mum got beaten by dad when i was 13.. The lucky parts was that my dad repented was therefore the family is left unbroken. I can really sensed that you are puzzled regarding family-related matters but whether whatever circumstance you are in now just live the fullest out of it. Don’t not allow bad experience or past’s hurt to rule your life.. May God bless mookie…

MooKu SG

Aunty Yun is getting a bit too profound. Embarassed

But thanks everyone, thanks for sharing.

I'm okay, don't worry, I just wanted to hear and that's all there is to it. I'm not depressed or anything, I just wanted to hear some personal experience, that's all.

Thank you all so much.

bladez you're still young so don't worry too much and keep working at it k?

hope aunty vk will soon be able to find someone again, to walk the journey of life hand in hand and grow old together

i think maro has come out of all this a very strong person heh heh. are u getting married soon?

it's really heartening to hear that all's well with soulwinner's family now.

Thank you everybody. I'm okay! Laughing

de_middle SG

whenever such things happen, its sad....very sad if there are young kids in the picture Sad

soulwinner SG

Good.. Hope to see u in crapbox tonight..

BadzMaro SG

Marriage ? ? I am still thinking about it. I am not sure , i dont know. I still weighting my happiness n doing the things i love or sacrificing for the better of everyone else. I am actually afraid later i may end up like my parents. So i focus on doing my stuffs first. But there are pros n cons in getting married early...

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