A r/s problem.. any solutions?

lysa SG

Hi everybody I got a problem to share.

I am an 18 year old girl and got a 23 year old guy for a boyfriend

I got a nice boyfriend the age gap between is 5 years to me is a little too big to him I am childish whereas I could say that I knew lots of things which he doesnt he didnt know I have got someone to spy on him and from there I knew a lot about his past and present. The report I gotten was a beautiful oneto be frank, I admit that I am unscrupulous in certain other ways in handling people which he doesnt know at all

To him I am not that mature to make it sounds nice to me he said that I was wondering if I am not mature whats the point of him being with me in the first place... we knew each other earlier this year at our workplace

He needs a girl that is able to talk to him about intellectual stuff but in some or another way I think I failed because he said I should give myself a little bit more time. But I am able to support him emotionally and physically but not intellectually hes a currently studying a University whereas I am studying at ITE. The difference is rather bigbut I know I will make it there some day I tried reading lots of newspaper and discuss with him some intellectual stuff but I find it very hard to keep on reading on and on I find it tiring

Hes the best that ever could happen to me but I just felt that we are out of range no doubt initially the chemistry between was all right but not fantastic.

I am trying real hard to be intellectually on par with him and I do lots of research in the subjects hes majoring in. I done all that all in the hope that I will be able to help him academically.

Nowadays I find it boring to go out with him and a hassle to call or message him, all bottoms to the fact that he dont like to message me or call me much but he wont go MIA for sure sometimes hes really a mood spoiler I dont know what to say

I got to say that hes a lot of different in other guys I knew, hes not a flirt and doesnt like to talk to girls except work stuff or school work but I am different I am a big time flirt and a player. Find it rather hard to go out with him hes boring! Guys out there.. any idea to spice up this r/s?

At times, I felt he came at the wrong time and truth to be told he came at the wrong place too because of him I broke up with my guy whom I have been dating for the past 2 years sometimes I think back, I regretted my decision. But with my current bf, I learnt lots of things which I havent with my ex.

Okay, I will write till here any experienced ones do give me your two cents worth do write to me thx :>

rainee SG

Hmm...be yourself?

When he falls in love with you, he does not seem to mind so much about your age and education level right?

As for him being boring...maybe you should find out something that both of you enjoy and can do together...and when you said you are a flirt, do you still have an urge to flirt with other guys now even tho you are already attached?

Gackt247 SG

Love and chemistry transcends all barriers.. be it age, status etc. Well tt's the ideal some pple would choose to believe.

Personally i dont. We humans have a certain degree of prejudice n steroetyping tendencies. Like ladies generally dun like younger men. In ur case.. he being older n of higher education being the obstacle.

The thing is.. yes.. it might irk him. But if he still likes u feel comfortable with u. I see no prob. But if he doesnt.. den let fate decide whether u two still can be tgt. Love may be able to be nurtured. But chemistry takes alot more.

No pt making urself miserable n tired trying to reach his so-called level. Differences may be a put off. But it can also be attractive. It could be ur differences tt attracted him to u in the 1st place. If it's not the case... surely there's some1 else out there who appreciates them.

Well.. there's this saying: Opposites attract. It doesnt work on all individuals but it does work.. sometimes..

Good luck.. Wink

Ito_^ SG

there is no such thing as an ideal r/s.

alwaysdisturbed SG

for all the fun u had previously...

its ur payback.

Gackt247 SG

At least she had fun.. where's the fun being Gacky the Monk.. Crying or Very sad

alwaysdisturbed SG

endure and excel.
haha

Gackt247 SG

Nabeiz.. u combat engineer rite? Laughing

alwaysdisturbed SG

haha...
u trying to be funny?
endure and excel = combat engineer.

Devil1976 SG

What sort of 'player' are you?

Gackt247 SG

tt one their motto i tink.. trying my luck to create a connection. Mr. Green

0lala SG

players deserve nothing
believe it or flame it,either way ur mark ass readed it

yuppy4life SG

Actually, I was this kind of guy. A bit stupid only can talk facts and can not make gals happy.

Deep down, I think he is also looking for someone who can show him how to have a good time. Bring him out. Let him get loose and break the tension between you two.

Don't change yourself... except the player part.... and be happy around him. Don't need to soo stressed about it cos at the end of the day, he is happy to be around you.

molgax SG

u gotta think and reflect on y u wanna check him up

what sort of a player are you ?

do u want to check him up all your life ?

do you know that this will lead to insecurity ?

what kind of past or present u find disturbing ?

what do you think will happen if he found that you are a player ?

did you tell him what u posted here ? that u tried researching and what not ? just to be on par with him ? did you even tell him on not on par with him ?

what kind of a r/s u looking for ?

what does this guy have that make u dump ur ex of 2 years for him ?

how will you be sure that you won't dump him for another guy ?

have u forgotten your ex of 2 years ?

how did 2 years of memories just vanish ?

were you just also playing ur ex of 2 years ?

are you also playing this guy ?

did he even mind that you are in ITE ?

just a few questions that came to my mind

my few cts

cheers

alwaysdisturbed SG

haha, u got it wrong.

Bontakun SG

Tell him what you put in here.

dork3d SG

Hmmm... Why is it that you have to put yourself onto the same intellectual standards as him? It's good to have some differences rather than "same frequency"...

If he really minds about your intellectual standards, no doubt he'll mind your childishness...

In a relationship, it can be two opposites that will complement each other in each pther's stronger points...

Me's a Master (1st class Hons) while my wife's a 'O' level grad... But me never mind her cos there's things she broadened my mind and perspectives while me complements her on the stronger part of intellectuallity...

Also my wife is also younger than me by quite a huge gap than yours... But it's the understandings that we share and make us feel so unique and attached to each other...

lysa SG

yea.. probably u are right when he fell in love wif me..

gd idea for me n him doin thgs we love to do..

i lost all the interest in flirting wif other guys after i gotten attached to him..

lysa SG

I agreed to all u hv said... he really needs me to loosen him up mentally.. i am already changed... no longer a player... thanks for ur kind advice...

ski8 SG

thats quite something when the guy dont mind when he met u

as u said ur going flirty with other guys..not all intellectual guys r boring (some say they may look aloof or just cool with not much words ) n not all

guys r as deep as they look when u "examine" them thoughfully Laughing