Affected by stuffs I did, or never did in the past

DrTech SG

I'll keep this as short as possible.

Lately, I was reminded of stuffs I did like 8-10 years ago when I was younger. Stuffs that made me feel guilty. One of it was actually stealing $50 from my mom's purse. I felt guilty then, but I didn't dare to voice it out. I was really upset because we weren't exactly well-to-do and $50 actually meant alot to the family. Now, I can't forgive myself for doing that. I don't know how to face it.

It then began snowballing, with all the bad memories I tossed aside all coming back. Another was the fact I made my babysitter's life a living hell. Not literally, but there were times when I made her really upset. She passed away long ago and now I wish I could tell her how sorry I was.

Even though I know if I told my mom now, she'd probably forgive me since it was so long ago. But I just can't forgive myself for the things I did. Just somehow, I can't live with the guilt. I know these aren't exactly very serious offenses, but... it's affecting me really bad.

I can't get proper sleep lately, ocassionally crying myself to sleep. I don't know why it's affecting me so badly now... I really wish I could let it go... but...

huy SG

i do did lots of nasty stuffs in the past.. steal money from my parents cos i wan to get a new wallet.. push my younger bro to the wall until now he stil got the scar on his forehead.. then staple my fre’s hand accidentally during primary 1.. cheat during common tests…. i mean this is part of growing up… everyone did nasty things before.. if they are still around, try to repay them back by showing more concern to them, giving them treats, visiting them.. if they are not around, then show your care to their loves ones.. don brood over it.. no pt crying over spilt milk..

Cool-gal SG

well, we are not perfect unless we are God. dun be sad or brood abt the past as u can do nothing to turn time back. now just live ur life to the fullest with fruitful results, do more good to repent lor. if u r a free thinker, think of going into a religion lor, might do good for u subconsciously.

viciouskitty74 SG

your chemical balance of your body are slightly off. Its made worse by your lack of sleep. And you have too much free time.

Give yourself a day. Go for a good haircut, facial or massage. drink lots of water and cut down your meals to something lighter. Cut fruits & yogurt is a good choice or a soupy chicken soup.

practise deep breathing, meditation before you sleep. play some light spiritual music of your religion before you sleep. keep mind empty.

Sleep.

Once you are better. Bring your mother out to a good breakfast and some shopping for her to anything she chooses.

Chat with her about the old days and possibly ask about where your Nanny is buried. maybe bring her there and get a bunch of flowers there.

Letting means facing your guilt and learning to compensate.

browniebaobao SG

dun harp on the past.

sometimes we really have to learn to forgive ourselves and others to move on..

wat matters is.. dun do it again.

pipipopo SG

Has anyone ever stepped on an ant or kicked a cat on the streets in their past or right at this moment? The pain the victims felt is far more immense than what has been mentioned.

Move on.

browniebaobao SG

I ever stepped on a C.o.c.kroach accidentally and I Still feel guilty till now..

It's so unforgettable.. the black and sticky thing on my bare foot.. Neutral

Seth35 SG

Brother…How old were you back than…you were also childish what…So ? Its life… People want to use that to disturb you….Fuck them up and stay away from them… What you do in life now is more important than what you do in the past…

DrTech SG

I understand… feeling better already. Dunno why I thought of those stuffs in the first place…

beavan SG

too much estrogen? Mr. Green

ha8n SG

thought wat , IT stuffs Question Mr. Green

kecang_puteh SG

It's time to let go. Last time I also killed 2 people and robbed another dozen or so people before. I was depressed for while, sure, like who wouldn't? But after some time, you kind of move on to other things. Now, after so long, I don't even think about it anymore

Cool-gal SG

Shocked
dun k siao leh...

pwnz0r SG

Man, all those things that you did kinda pales to the ‘regrets’ or ‘mistakes’ I did with my life. Important thing is just to move on. I do agree from time to time, such thoughts come back to ‘haunt’ me, but this is a game everyone plays with themselves on the what-if’s. It already has passed, so just move on.

Reutral SG

You just have to understand that Life is a learning process.

It's actually healthy for you to look back now and grieve at some of the past mistakes you did. Because this shows that you have learnt and matured.

But when it gets to you in away that it's actually affecting you then you have to get a grip.

Life is always a learning process... we learn more about ourself... our enviorment... about Life... so it's not like you did anything grave in the past.. just that you weren't that learnt/matured at that stage.

Now that you are.. look back once awhile... smile to yourself for being a silly boy then... and look forward to new life lessons or better... help other boys and prevent them from commiting the same mistakes.

rikki SG

Would you rather brood over what happened than to actually LEARN from it? Seriously, there's nothing you can do as what has happened has already happened. You can either take it as a mark to remind yourself for the wrong things you had done forever. Or you can take it as a LEARNING point to remind yourself that you will never do such a thing ever again.

Its all part of growing up.

I remember when i was young, i pushed a classmate down the stairs. To think of it, I felt really guilty. Which is why, i take it as an experience TO LEARN FROM IT. Which is why, i treat my friends BETTER now.

OO_OO_OO SG

u need councelling.

DrTech SG

Yeah, I do find it a lil trivial... but somehow, I wasn't able to face it. Now, i'm feeling better after talking to some people. Guess it was a really random phase... Confused