The hardships of a guy with a speech impediment

Haoz30 SG

hey cheer up~

Look, if the ladies can't accept ur "flaw" then they aren't the ones for you. If the lady really love u, they will actually accept u, being yourself. I'm sure you have seen many couples where we would classify as "xian hua cha zhai nui fen shang". Why does these girls seems so attracted to them? Answer is simple: Love is blind and love is the strongest power on this planet. I'm pretty sure you'll find someone whom is able to accept the way you are.

p/s: look at it from another point of view, you may be born with a "flaw". I would actually consider that a "Test machine of love". Cool

Pullup Addict SG

I do not mind if an average jane with a similar problem likes me, to me being loved by someone who likes you who you are will be the best thing that can ever happen to me.

I have thought about surgery but my parents abhor the notion saying it is too dangerous especially when i am helthy and stuff. Then there is the money issue which is also out of the question due to my study loans.

Who knows this may be a test machine of love. maybe i can use this to find someone special. For now, i have to be strong for the sake of my future. Thanks to those who have posted, really appreciated the help Smile

Ganasai SG

do u have short tongue or u just have a problem speaking well? i see yourself in me during my younger days, what you going thru is exactly what i experienced then. I am now 30, at the age u fear that you will still not experience love and my speaking deficiency still exist, yet to experience love myself, hold a girl hand, have my first kiss and sleep thru the whole nite together with the woman i loved.

Life still goes on for me, no have means no have, but being human with an animal nature, there is the so called mating season, and i am beginning to have the urge to settle down and start a family. But how to do it without a mating partner, there are short terms relieve (if u get what i mean), and long term, though tedious ones (mating agencies), have tired but without success so far, partly becos i still want to find my princess thru natural means. Like a bro here had said, worse come to worse, find a vietnamese bride, maybe after getting one, u may be relieve at the end of it that u never get the chance to know a local woman Mr. Green

Cool-gal SG

TS, hey, i think u presented urself very well here. Actually it doesnt matter u have a short or long tongue, as long u get ur message across. i think thats just one of ur negative view of urself. be confident. i know one of the channel 5 new reporter with short tongue too, but she is able to speak it so professionally and clearly like wad u have written here. hmm, just let those ignorants to continue their evil deed and one day they will realised and grow up. i have speech problem too but then i bo chup.
cheers.

R3SsH|n SG

how many pullups can u do?
i now cannot do even one... Sad

105090 SG

maybe this helps

http://www.floss.com/q17.htm

apparently, a simple surgery is all it needs.

fudgester SG

Well, even if you speak well physically, I see you can write quite well. What I believe is that if you're lacking in something, that you will have something else to make up for it.

In the first place, have you found out what could be the problem with your speech? For all you know surgery may not be needed, and all you need is some speech therapy sessions.

I would suggest going down to your friendly neighbourhood GP who can advise you more on this matter.

Gedanken SG

I'm going to go out on a limb here and propose that they key issue here is the attitude that you take to your condition.

As others here have noted, you suffer no lack of communication skills - your post is clear and well-articulated. As you have noted yourself, your speech impediment undermines your confidence despite your positive qualities, and if you take this as a starting point, everything else can be seen to follow it.

Getting away from the abstract, I put forward the case of a close friend of mine. She lost her hearing at the age of four owing to a childhood disease, and in fact was not diagnosed as being hearing-imparied for the next five years. By that time, teachers had mistaken her hearing impairment as an intellectual disability.

Here's the damdest thing - she never took any notice of it, at least not apparently. She became student president at pre-university, and went on to finish her honours degree, and on top of that has gone on to do anything that any able-bodied person would do and then some. The clincher is that for years I'd wanted to date her, but do you think she was ever short of attention? Hell no - I never got to get a word in edgewise.

To this day we remain close friends. She's been with her partner for seven years and I'm engaged to someone else, but even today I'll freely admit that her outlook on life is wonderfully attractive. She's never let anything stop her, shallow-minded detractors be damned - that's just downright sexy in my book.

At the risk of doing a Tony Robbins, the bottom line is that you have a choice - focus upon your shortcomings and let them cripple you, or ignore them and make best use of what you do have. It's up to you.

Pullup Addict SG

I will try to focus on my strong points and ignore my speech defect, but i really do not know. For now i will take it one step at a time to improve on my confidence.

This journey of mine will be arduous, tough and full of despair and disappointment. I will try to walk across this desert of an obstacle alone and try to be brave for my future.

My worst fear is of course dying of an old age alone without even experiencing love due to this confounded tongue of mine. I will try to be confident but it will take time for me on my part to adjust to my comfort level.

Gedanken SG

PA, do keep in mind that it’s not about physical characteristics, it’s about character. Those who cannot get past the blatently obvious are not worth your time – those who can are worth all the time in the world.

Pullup Addict SG

Will take that in mind, thanks! I may be heading over to a GP soon to have my problem checked and also to see a counseller to help me with a plan on this issue.

Gedanken SG

All the best, PA. From your posts, I'd say that you do have a lot going for you, so focus on that and let the person that you really are shine out! Very Happy

Devil1976 SG

Don't worry, you probably have not even come to the meat of things yet. And it would be likely that that might not even be the real issues you could be facing in a relationship in the future. So like what Gedanken has suggested... Don't let that add as an additional barrier among all things possible...

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