I think first of all, one must accept that regardless of whether
you are married or not, you WILL find people who are attractive to
you. We are only humans, and if you think you will NEVER see
someone you might find likeable, then you have no preparation to
face an encounter like this. In fact, I always think it is good to
have someone you enjoy looking at while at work. It helps u to want
to go to work.
Secondly, I think you need to first address the 'home ground'
issue. You may love ur wife now. But trust me, it is very easy for
human beings to make 'excuses' to themselves. The moment your wife
(also being human presumably) does something that irritates you or
frustrates you, you will start to 'explain' to yourself that the
whole marriage thing appears to have problems. Previously, you
might be pissed off but forgive more easily. But now, you have a
reason to not forgive and forget that easily. So what to do?? I
agree w above poster that during weekends when not 'affected' by
outside attraction, to plan something special for your wife and
'fill' up whatever emptiness you feel inside ur heart and try to
enjoy the time spent w ur wife as much as u can. Basically protect
ur home ground, make it a pleasant place for yourself
Thirdly, don't think about ... 'this type' and 'that type' Its VERY
limiting. Most human imagination have a 'type' that they think is
'ideal' What they don't realise that simply because something don't
fit the 'type' doesnt mean it isnt IDEAL for themselves. Most guys
would say 'their type' is the type of wife that is sweet, demure,
good natured acceptably pretty.. bla bla..but most men don't marry
women like this primarily becos MOST women arent sweet, demure,
good natured all the time.
For an inexplicable reason, my husband suggests you tell ur wife.
(hmmm! He says he would tell me) I think if your wife is that type
that can understand what's happening . This might make both of u closer even! Hee... human
nature is something that can be rather unpleasant. Helps if both of
u learn to stand on the same line to fight against it.
