Orange speaks my mind.
Remember - it's not even about love because your statement begin
with '...she resemble my ex-gf'. Technically, you are feeding on
something of a past - an emotional bondage. 
What you need is closure.
You ex treated you so badly that you hated her.
You can debate to death in front of me but Im sure the following
are your thoughts:
If I had done some
things differently to my ex, maybe the outcome will be different.
Maybe we will be living happily ever after! If only thats the
case
if only
But you know she will never come back to you.
It is a fantasy.
Now you met this Thai girl who looks a lot like your ex. You start
to get emotional all over again! She gives you hope the first time
you saw her!
And you dont even need to understand her language, as long as she
can give you what you have been looking for
CLOSURE!
Why?
Because you are secretly excited that this little fantasy of yours
can finally come true.
You can shower that Thai girl with all your love and she will love
you in return. This mutual love is something that your ex cannot
give you and you long for it.
GET OVER THAT EX OR SHE WILL SCREW YOUR LIFE UP ONE MORE
TIME
No, you have not gotten over your ex AT ALL. You hated her because
you felt that you needed closure.
You are substituting your ex with that Thai girl without even
realizing it.
You think you have found a new direction in life. You are so wrong.
The fact is, you are not moving on at all
you are still at the same
spot!
This critical part of orange's essay is an
example, in written form, of a dimension in a karmic relationship.
You can continue to delude yourself by justifying your behaviour
through blind feelings and you can also prepare yourself to be
landed in a pathetic state.
yunhaier personally knows a prostitute (as a friend) and lemme tell
you that industry is blacker than coal. Don't ask me how I know
her; it's very much about fate and ji yuan qiao he (And yes, no
transaction or whatever sh!t.. knew as a friend, like all other
friends in my life)
When this business trade becomes an unprofessional
dealing... you are in for some trouble.
I recall an old law in CloUdiSm (Boundary Phasing), which talks
about how people change their stance with time. Originally, this
law speaks of a party, having terrible partner, constantly
rephrasing his/her principles, level of tolerance and 'land mines'
just to compromise psychologically, as by doing so, it could
sustain the person emotionally balanced.
I have a best friend, who got out of a lousy relationship, and
decides to flirt for a period of time - a common emotional
mechanism often used to protect oneself. In name of flirt, she
enters into a relationship with a married man, and ended up falling
in love with him.
Rephrasing to justify
decision.
And in your case, you are the same: attempting to make a desired
dish, using wrongly bought ingredients... to make
this quickie session MORE than just a 'professional' paid service
and bounded by karmic bondage. You may not have sex with her, but
what is your original desire when you step into GL looking for
girls? And if you are not there for paid-sex, then what are your
dealings there?
Don't justify blindly and wholly based yourself on the context of
Love. It was never for her case, even if it was for you. You
previously made screwed-up decision; don't repeat history.
Cheers
