Is a girlfriend the same as a wife-to-be? What if the person you
are with is gf material, but not someone that you can spend the
rest of your life with? Is this girl still worth the time and
effort?
I admit that i have quite a high expectation for my wife, and that
my current gf does not meet all of them. There are certain traits
that i do not really accept in her, such as her stubborn-ness (such
a word?), lack of respect (in some ways), and her past, which still
irks me (have accepted, but will never forget it).
Why i say that she is gf material is that we are quite close
already, being together for more than a year, and i admit that she
is nice to me and we get along quite well. The first few months
were fantastic, the so-called honeymoon period and it was like in
heaven.
Lately, since last june.. i start to find that we were not that
compatible afterall. she will never give-in in an arguement and i
have to say sorry most of the time. and we became less romantic.
Now, she feels more like a close friend rather than someone I can
spend my life with. I can tell that she's not likely to stand by me
through all difficulties and stuff i may face in the future. u
know.. the through thick and thin kind..
To her, for now, everything is alright. but to me, something is
lacking in this relationship. I don't feel what i used to feel
anymore. i lie about my feelings sometimes to make her happy and
think that nothing is wrong.. to the extent that i cannot say my
deepest feelings.. maybe they have bottled up to the top, which
gives this sucky confused feeling..
I admit that my mind has strayed. I've been browsing through
friendster and it reminded me that there are plenty of better
fishes out there. problem is, my social circle is very limited and
i only know 3 girls other than her.
I really don't know, so confused. arghh, can't even phrase out my
thoughts properly.. it's all jumbled up. if only i could pull this
messy bunch of chains into one straight line, it would be so much
easier to solve...
