Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Uncommitted relationship.
Each of you love your respective partners, just that chances are,
you two are desensitized to your long going relationship. There is
a vulnerability to everything fresh, willing and different.
There is a exchange of mutual needs based on same vulnerability.
[b]We attract the
qualities we exude - people who always attract
others who are technically not unavailable, will always find
themselves having this problem - the uncommitted will attract the
uncommitted (it doesn't matter if one is single. You can be single
and find difficulty in commitment as well).
When you change the nature of your work and it affects your
relationship, it creates an emotional instability. It so happened
that your instability is re-channelled into your crush, which
simultaneously, gain stability from your channelling (she was
instable at the same time - two negative makes a positive).
Both of you knows that this sub-rosa relationship wouldn't work
out. It is merely there to fulfil a certain self absorbed needs.
You knew it, but your conscience probably work against you. She
knew it, but she still prefer to indulge in it.
***
Let's not look into your crush; in fact, lets review
your relationship.
I) What do you think has changed in your relationship when this
girl came into the picture?
II) How do you think of your relationship now... ESPECIALLY when
you have actually agreed to an underground relationship with
someone else.
III) What is this scenario trying to tell you? And by knowing, what
are you going to do with this knowledge?
When you are sure of the answers to the above questions, you should
roughly know what is the best course of action. 
Cheers[/b]
Yunhaier, thank you so much for your advise. I'll give myself
sometime to find out the answer.
