Sry I need to let it out

last SG · 2006-02-03T16:22:34+00:00

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yuko-ogura SG

give each other some time.

he could be facing stress for all u know..

y not try asking his family members whether anything happened to him recently?

sinicker SG

aye.. i cannot comment coz' like not enough details.

he may be experiencing stress from some problems which you and his family doesnt know. maybe he doesnt even want to tell you guys coz' he doesnt want to trouble you?

coffeeortea SG

hmm, is there some missing info about him we’re supposed to know?

AshedAnna SG

K...I try to tellu abit more...his ex has been sending me emails and harassing me abt last time u know i got pregnant and had to abort because one of my twin boys had alittle abnormal head growth...she say things like "haha like mother like son rite" etc...that one never mind. I just tell him a little bit abt it and he can't do anything also rite?
But everytime when i want to talk abt it i try not to because he book out on weekends...u know just make it happy and forget abt things..but sometimes at night u know when hes asleep i get very frustrated when im alone and cant sleep...like i don't like to hate people and everything la maybe shes still young..but everything i store inside me also no good..i called samaritans to talk but they cant do much also..
then his best friend's gf also keep talking abt his ex..they were gd friends last time la so she just say like that...then i told him abt it and he just get angry with me...saying im a bi-tch all that saying stuff abt her.. i wanted to confront the girl but shes very sensitive last time i tried i almost made her cry...i put it across very nicely too..hai...i dont hate her u know...i just want her to watch her mouth abit more...but i know if i make her cry no matter how i put it to her...everybody will blame me...sian..
He has everything lo...parents, car, ok army life...he wants anything he gets...then if somethinggoes wrong he blames the crap out of me. Say everything is me me me...i talk nicely also cannot...don't even mention these issues man..like other things...hows his day etc...last time he has alot to say to me..now its like..we can keep silent on the phone for more than 5 minutes...ten minutes..half hour also can. I wonder is it really me or what?

ShrodingersCat SG

why do you want to be with a guy like this?

At first when I read your first post, I thought he might be suffering from depression. But when I read your second post, I think this guy has BIG issues. He seems very young too, still in NS? Are you sure you want to settle down with a person like this?

ShrodingersCat SG

I dont think you are a burden to anyone simply cos you have problems. But i do think you got the answer there. What you don't need is MORE problems - and ur bf seems to be giving you more problems. Don't stay with a person simply cos you invested a lot of time/effort/sacrifices in a relationship already - no point right? Maybe you need some time apart for you and him to both sort out your own issues, and see clearly if he (and you) are the person you(he) want to be in a relationship with.

LazerLordz SG

AshedAnna, your case sounds familiar. Confused

AshedAnna SG

Devil1976 SG

Hmm... Just as I've suspected...?

Mmm...

Have you wonder why he has changed so much...? Even of how you've been... How YOU THINK yuo have changed much for the better... Why is he still like that...? Why are you still longing...? Looking out for...? Blaming him for....?

Based on 'surface analysis'... I SUSPECT you've contributed much to result in the change in him... But I really can't be too sure... I know too little about him to comment if it's his nature or anything... But from the outlook of things, you're certainly quite a slice of the pie...

And BASED on the CURRENT situation... It's... BAD...? The picture is probably something like this... You bringing in a change in him (at least patrial factor?), resulting in him (changed)... And this current 'him' who shows you NO LOVE and a BIG DIFFERENCE from the past is a BIG 'NO NO' for you... Causing you to further 'LOST YOUR HEAD'.... Asking yourself "What went wrong?" Somehow you've figured that something cannot happen for nothing... And you really do very much wish to have the old him back... 2 things to note here...

1. You might be doing it the wrong way... Do you often complain ALOT to him, comments and b|tch around things...?

2. If you ain't doing the above things (which I doubt so), then you really be TOO SOFT and MELLOW in this relationship... And he's probably EATING INTO YOU in this relationship....

But DO READ CAREFULLY on the 2 different scenerios I've posted above as they're VERY DIFFERENT PICTURES.. THINK through it CAREFULLY and let me in the FACTS... REMEMBER. No EGO, STUBBORNNESS or ANYTHING like that... Afterall it's YOUR RELATIONSHIP you're trying to SAVE...

If you're not honest with me and yourself... I'm afraid I can't help you...?

drx SG

Only you can help yourself.
no one can help you.
Is not they never try but will you listern?

Honestly lar do you really think he will change?
No he is bottling everything up rite now and will blow up soon mark my words.

You want him to change ?
First change yourself,
looking back at the past will not change anything.

Be nice to him. thats all.
cook something nice for him.

or just simply shut up
is just that simple ...
guys hate girls talking so much
let him have some peace for once.

I know deep in your heart you love him but your actions is driving him nuts.

nOrmalbOi SG

i dunno him. i dunno u.

just read thru ur blog a lil..

after all that... laptop and whatever services u can give... he asked... erm... i dunno.. u gave...

to the rest... it was CNY.. i guess it was especially impt for the family to be together on the eve for dinner as well as starting the yr together in 1 house..
u can try to disappear without a fone call or note next CNY eve.. and see if ur hp is gonna be bombarded with calls or not..

u can rant and rave all u want in here.. and ur questions will find answers in here too.. but u must understand that we do not know the full situation and thus will not be able to give u an accurate remedy(if u will) for ur situation... u would have to decide the next course of action for urself..

sometimes u need to be cruel to be kind.. so do what u need to do.

smudgey SG

sounds serious.... sounds like he's trying to run away from something...

give him time... he'll talk when he can bring himself to say it

yuko-ogura SG

could he have patched up with his ex? Rolling Eyes

skeujin SG

HUGS ANNA

AshedAnna SG

Be nice to him? Do you have ANY idea how nice I've been trying to be despite all this? ANYONE who disappears wthout a trace and comes back not giving a shit about the people who worries about him, I would've given him a piece of my damn mind. It scared the living hell out of me. And I have BEEN shutting up. Jesus.

laosu SG

Pardon me...you got pregnant in Melbourne? The baby is his?

AshedAnna SG

(yes it is) I got p. in Singapore..during the hols the kids come back to their own countries...then I held on to the pregnancy all the way till I got back to Melb and for in total 5 months...

taurian SG

this is my view : end the relationship & get a life

AshedAnna SG

Wow...thanks...next time if I can't face a problem I just run away.

AshedAnna SG

Look, Im sorry if I seem rude and all that…its just that its really been so crappy and I mean its just all stored up inside. He means the world to me and it was really easy to let go until him and his friends start talking about how he tried to get his ex back in front of my face, and abt their wonderful trip altogether to Sydney, blah blahblah…I mean every single weekend if we meet them…that was when we first got together and u know I was cool with it…I saw pictures of them kissing etc all that rubbish I was alright with it too because I was confident he’d be there for me because he proved it. Now its like…bah.