The Humiliation and Harsh Criticism I must bear...:(

last SG · 2005-03-08T12:02:23+00:00

I hope you'll grow from this phrase. All the best in your new school and fresh education. Cheers

vito_corleone SG

wot JI? jemiah islamia terrorist group? Smile

Rockhound SG

then tell ure mother to take o levels arh

ShrodingersCat SG

wow.. ouch.. Sad

honestly i dont know why she is so upset...
cos.. your results aren't all that bad what
the summit is always there for you to conquer
different people walk different ways up..
doesnt mean only one way...

Prove to your mom that this is a temporary set back to you
and you won't let your results stop you from achieving in life
there's SO MANY poly grads who do well
and honestly, I am a JC student who went to uni with a lot of poly grads
and you notice that many poly grads who are focused, tend also to be
a lot more resourceful and efficient.
i think it must hurt a lot...

hiding from your mom and letting the frustrations bottle up
isnt a solution... cos ur mom will also be more resentful
Moms will start to hink "results so bad still got mood go out play with friends"
that's how their minds work
they dont understand that you are feeling so hurt cos of what she said
also.. when she say all those tthings to the relatives
perhaps she also under pressure by them to be self effacing until too much liao.
Let her know how you feel honestly,
and tell her what's over is over.. what she want you to do?
Just make the best of it lah. and her support is integral to that.

if she still upset.. well at least you tried to bridge the problem
ultimately mother is mother ba..
sometimes just tendency to be emotional...
but u know she still loves u Smile

fudgester SG

I know it's easier said than done, but the best idea is to ignore what your mother said.

My father has always looked down on me because I never could do as well as my elder siblings. While my siblings got 251 and 268 respectively for their PSLE, I could 'only' get 226. In addition, I often got bullied and picked on by bullies.... all this gave him the impression that I'm weak, useless, and a good-for-nothing.

Once when I was 12, he shouted at me, 'What's wrong with you? Why can't you be like everyone else?!?!?!'

Translation: 'I'm ashamed of who you are.... It's wrong to be the person you are.'

That was 10 years ago. I'll be 22 this coming June. I still found that comment really hurtful.

I grew up thinking that my father was right all along and that I was indeed slow and weak. Maybe I am indeed too slow to figure out that he was wrong.

Anyway, I ended up thrashing both my siblings at both the GCE O and A Levels. Perhaps that'll give him some food for thought.

I just hope that I can have the strength to forgive my father for what he said on that day in 1995. I pray that someday, I can be forgiven too for thinking badly of my father.

Don't listen to your mother and end up like me....

Rockhound SG

my older bro was considered a genius.....

but my dad didnt really make an example out of him nor did he run me down becos i was average........i was good with my hands and had an analytical mind

even when relatives start parading their children during hari raya...my dad just gave them the couldnt be bothered kinda attitude...even if u are so smart...are u really happy for ureself?find that happiness in u rather than always making people happy..

u shouldnt worry of wat people think...there are blessings in disguise...

failing is not merely failing...

it just makes u better inside...

ditzy SG

Your mom is being herself, be glad that your mom is being herself.

Oyathatsme SG

commit suicide and jump down from the building lar like the old man who jump down at tampines. Make your mum's life easier without you around and yours.
easy.

vito_corleone SG

well u only have yourself to blame for not working hard enough..ok la im a lazy bastard too but luckily i managed to get something deccent.

DriftingGuy SG

L1R5 19? So what?!

let me tell you a story:

I had a friend who had L1R4 27.. had to get into a poly

On the day I saw him before entering poly, he has that beaming look on his face. he said:" Today is a beautiful day. Let this be beginning...

6 years later: I heard hes doing very well, already has his own business,a beautiful girlfriend and his own car... In the eye of the public, hes one of those few entrepreneurs who may become the shining example of heartlanders..

In short, the future is uncertain, the winners you see around you may be struggling to get a job in the future; the "losers" you see now may have high-paying jobs or their own businesses in the future...

Never lose hope and never give up!!

shade343 SG

Laughing Your post very interesting leh Very Happy

mach10 SG

No one holds your future except you. Its in your hands, not your mum's. She probably tried to hold your future in her mouth. snatch it back... it suppose to be in your hands. So go for your dreams...

All da best!!

PS: one can have a PhD and still be a dam bastard...

cheerios!

rumie SG

...

hey, cheer up... it's really not end of the world unless you want it to be...

it's a sad truth that in singapore, the newer generation are judged based on that slip of paper... and, i rmb i used to say that: this is a crazy world; we spend so much to earn that piece of paper so that we can use that piece of paper to earn more pieces of paper (aka, money lar~)...

correct me if i'm wrong, but it seems that most parents nowadays have this silly mentality that thier kids have to go through the "proper path", i.e. primary - secondary - jc - uni - work... and most of them think that, other than this path the rest are crap.

sigh~

really, my advice to you is, live life to the fullest. it doesn't what people think, the most impt is what you think of yourself. do your best, and your path will be laid out to you in a way that suits you the best.

do your best...

sunniban SG

O lvls isn't e end of the world......
and just because you do well in 1 exam doesn't mean you're set for life...

Going to Poly doesn't mean you're a failure either...... JC isn't all its hashed up to be.....

Well, just ignore your mum's complaining and all....... She has your best interests at heart. She probably feels that if u were to feel ashamed, you would have something to prove and will study harder...... 3 yrs is a long time. Surely if u try hard enuff you'll be able to come in near the top.....

ntu slacker SG

feel compelled to post it

keep ur chin up!

look at me... i used to be doing alot better in school now im failing like MAD in NTU....

but i am HAPPY! HAPPIER than ever.... HAPPIER than e days when i got As and stuff in school!

why? because i now truly know what i want to acheive in life at this age of 21.... and i am glad i am able to define my dreams at a age where people around me are JUST preparing to get into the proverbial rat race. it also helps that i found a girl whom i truly want to marry.

the next step... get out from NTU and flesh out my dreams. be one whom i TRULY want to be. why let society dictate who we truly are? why let society dictate what we truly want to acheive

life is stranger than fiction. get out of the mindset of conforming and achieve what you truly want today. yes today! start planning. start dreaming. Dreams truly are what symbolises the successful and happy people of today. And with happiness and success, you acheive something that transcends even the assets of the truly wealthy, the fame of the superstars and the power of the truly powerful.... something never temporal, something you can take to your deathbed.... HONESTY.

HONESTY to yourself that you have ACHEIVED your DREAMs by your EFFORTs. And even better doing all these beside your LOVED ONES.

Why conform? Dream.

Just my 2 cents. I am serious. Its time we found our meaning in life. Not stick to an education system created and refined for creating automatons. If you feel you are meant for a life of academia, do it. If you feel you are meant to soar up the corporate ladder, do it. If you feel you are meant to own the corporate ladder (warning, no illusions of granduer what u'll be the next Bill Gates!!!), do it.

Dream. But DON'T delude. DON'T lie to yourself. DON'T conform. DON'T do something you arent meant to.

education is just to provide us with some knowledge. its just a journey. not the end. i never believed it should be a system anyway.

keep your chin up ok!? everyone seems to be jia-ing you. do remember that the successful AND happy people.... they had diverse backgrounds... some had poly, some had O Levels, some had PhDs.... but they have something in common... dreams. and the boldness not to conform.

Alleycat SG

We all go thru phases in life that we felt we failed somehow.

I took my O levels twice because during my time it was hard to get in polytechnic with 29 points. Waste one year. After a year in my polytechnic I got expelled because I was kinda slow and they din give me 2nd chance.

During NS, I took up night classes, but sadly the school closed down halfway. After NS, I took a fulltime job and studied night-time at a local polytechnic.

I got retrenched a year into my job. So I went to work part-time odd jobs and study my diploma at night. Then I decided to take on another diploma full-time (one year) while continue my night class. With certain kind of luck, I completed the fulltime diploma and now with only 4 more months before i finish my part-time diploma.

So you see, things happen for a reason.

Cheer up, you are DEFINITELY a worthy person.

liyan SG

maybe it is not your mother how wants to be comparing, but other relatives? it is always better for a mother to critisise her own child than to critisise some other's mah...

i dont like my mother lor, and whenever i fail in my subjects, she will just tell relatives tt my maths last in class, and between me and my best friends we round up the class... hahaha... to think she can make a joke out of it.

and that is 6 yrs ago. in sec 1.
i eventually got a a2 in emaths, but i proceeded to studying a dip irrelevant to maths irregardless how hard i worked for the a2. then when i graduate, i proceed to work in a field totally out of point again.

but all along, when other relatives tries to probe, my mother will just laugh at me and move to another topic, while saying my relative's children are doing good.

maybe personally i was never affected by the neighbouring kids and relative's childrens' results. they are they and i am myself. same thing, you have to learn to disregard negative comments, and look at it in a new light.

coffeeortea SG

firstly, i just finished the o levels like you, i did not get VERY good results but i guess my parents knew i did my best. Did you show any effort to your parents in trying to do well? I hope your father is not like her, you could seriously talk to your father, there has to be someone you can talk to in the family right? what about your siblings? are they too cocky that they are doing better to talk to you? what actions are you going to take from now?

I-like-flings(m) SG

cheer up up.. my cousin got 263 and still got caned by his dad Mr. Green

Simple_Bear SG

Yoz...

Forget abt the 'O' level results...n start afresh at poly...work hard there lohz...

Diff ppl haf diff talents...some ppl dun gt super gd results even though they r smart...U r a unique individual...

Dun care abt Ur mom's comments...all parents hope for their children to be successful in terms of academic results in sch...but some dunno hw hard it is to struggle to meet expectations...

U might find wat U really excel in later in life...

JIA YOU...

Cheers...

SodaPrincess SG

cheer up it's not the end of the world! i think your mum was disappointed cos she expected better from you. So she's was just venting her frustrations on the phone.

so what if u got 19 points? my best friend had around the same points he went to poly from normal academic stream. found his niche in engineering and was on the dean's list every year in poly.

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