What will be ur reaction ?

paradox86 SG

Your gf told you one day tht she had an abortion few yrs ago. Can u accept it ? What will be ur reaction

[email protected] SG

huh?err i tink kinda hard to accept ba…jus like when she told ya she got sex with other guys b4…as in like 3 or 4…u also will feel very sad and angry…but for awhile oni i tink…unless u reali cant accept it and then dump her lo…

paradox86 SG

Upon hearing this, i dun really mind after thinking about it. But somehow she gave me a diff image. Confused

parn SG

Well, she must have love you so much to have told you such an unfortunate incident that happened to her in the past.

As a guy, if you love her...you must accept it and cherish her even more. If you felt that you don't love her that much anymore, it might just be a good time to use that as an excuse to dump her...which most guys would do so. Rolling Eyes

Anyway, now that she has come clean with you. You know for sure that she is definitely clean...thoroughly clean...HAHHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!!!!!!! Laughing Mr. Green

At least she trusts you enough to be able to visualise you in her future, else she wouldn't even mentioned it to you.

No matter what, better than she tells you that she actually has a son/daughter hanging at home and that's the real reason why she can't stay out late with you. Razz

Follow your heart. Smile

paradox86 SG

I told myself since she got this type of treatment before, i'll make sure i love her wholeheartly.. my mind told me this but my heart doesn't. I'm so vexed Rolling Eyes

parn SG

Hmm...think you felt sorry for her, that's all. Sad
And you are probably terribly disappointed with her, I can't really tell you whether you love her or not at this point.

If 86 is your year of birth, then you are probably too young to understand and accept her situation.

Some girls have been through a worse ordeal than her, so don't expect all the girls that you meet will be normal or have led a normal life...not everybody is that fortunate in life.

Hope things goes well for both of you. Smile

Devil1976 SG

Why not?

choco B SG

Is the issue over the fact that she's had sex before, or that she had an abortion before? Are you against abortions?

browniebaobao SG

dun mind ba. everyone has a past. she tells u coz she loves u and dun want to lie to u..

Ayla SG

I think you should be clear-minded and mature in handling this situation.

Trust me, abortion nowadays is not big deal... There are various reasons for it. Don't take it too hard.

Magnus SG

Nothing's perfect, bro.

You can't expect perfect love/relationship.
Maybe you are being a bit idealistic.

blowfish SG

she trust you she told you.
she did not want to deceived you as afraid to lose you next time u find up..

she had the courage to take the risk telling u...cos she love u

mach10 SG

Agree...

If she had an abortion and u have difficulty accepting her truthfullness... Wat if she tells u its because she was raped, or something... wats worse? How will u, den, react?

I tink the main thing is whether u guys Love each other. full-stop.

Patrik SG

Sit down and have a good talk with her.

mach10 SG

by the way...

In Yr 2000, Singapore Abortion Rate hit 22.6%.

now is 2005... and its hitting higher.

Singapore population? 4mil. No. of girls between 15 to 35? not alot... maybe 1 mil? if its one mil... 22.6% is hell lot of girls having abortion... every year!!!

c0mplex SG

hmm…IMO..the real issue is whether you are able to accept her(including her past)...if you are willing to accept her…make sure that you her truely and willingly….this is very important….don’t regret your decision after you two get married(if you two really get married)....and…most importantly….don’t let this issue be something to mention about if there was to be a quarrel in the future…it would just hurt the girl very very deeply….

Yunhaier SG

You expect someone, whom you have a relationship with, to have a history akin to that of a piece of white paper? Everything new, untainted and clean?

Reality.

This only measure yourself. Your mind says 'its ok' - your mind sees the above paragraph, but your heart doesn't seemed so. This is how narrow your heart gets.

***

I don't like Uncle Sam, but he cooks good food.

I love Uncle Tom, but he doesn't know how to cook.

Even if I get the good food cooked by Uncle Sam, it taste bad to me because I don't like him. And I don't finish the all food.

Uncle Tom tried cooking something and it turned out to be horrible. But I still eat them... everything.

***

P.S: It's all about the individual. Nothing else matters as much. Idea

Cheers

the_don SG

i no guy so no idea wat my reaction will be. but i ever had the opportunity of a guy telling me about the abortion his ex had after he impregnated her. he wanted to know if i mind and wat i tot of it. my first reaction is 'erh, ok. so?'

there is no need to look at pple who made the choice of having an abortion through colored glasses. it is their choice.

nightzip SG

hmm...what is past is past.

perhaps u will send her in different perspective, but after some time for contemplation....u will get over it and remain together? maybe with a tighter and closer relationship? Very Happy

fudgester SG

I won't lie.... I'll be perturbed if she tells me that she's had an abortion before. I still believe in that supposedly old-fashioned stuff about how you should save sex for your wedding night. I also believe that abortion is cruel and should never be carried out unless if extraordinary circumstances demand it.

That said, if all that happened in the past, and she is willing to put the past behind her, then so am I.

If I truly love her, she'll always be the one for me, no matter what her past was like. After all, no one's perfect..... I also have my own personal demons continually haunting me. If she can accept me in spite of my own past, then I can accept her past as well.