Need Advice :( ??

joai28 SG

Thanx for the advice guys Smile in fact, i have already started to move on though we r still remaining as close friends. I tried not to let my negative feelings abt her affect our friendship. I can understand why she's opening her options Afterall, she wants to be fair to hereself but on the expense of others. Anyway, i think its kinda contradicting or maybe ironic that to let her know that i'm still ard as a frenz and she can always look for me when she has problems but i dun wanna give her the attention i used to in the past. Just wondering if i'm narrow minded in this matter.

AngGuKuay SG

of cos not... u are just protecting yourself only... wat's more she has attached... u dun really have tt obligation to give her all the attention...
It's easier for me to say... but... whether u can do it or not is another problem...

Oyathatsme SG

My advise to you is just move on in life and find a new chick. You are being controlled by her and is not a good thing. It’s like having sex and she’s taking the lead. You confessed your feelings to her and pop you end up hurting yourself. Now the best thing u could do is to “act” busy when she calls you or sms you. Whenever you are on the phone with her, pretend that you got something to do and have to put her down. ignore her for a week or so. make her miss you. dont call her on valentines day, see if she calls you.

bratpig SG

hey joai,

i'm in the same predicament as you.

the only difference is that i'm still hanging on. hanging on a very slim hope that she may one day accept me.

i know that i should not be a 3rd party. however, she told me that her bf treated her like dirt. she even said that we can be together provided both of us are single.

i tried my best to treat her good. cheer her up when she is sad. do silly things. i even broke up with my gf. everytime i chat with her, my face is smiling, but my heart is bleeding.

but up till today...haiz

i know i am silly. i even told myself not to wait for her anymore. haha. juz kidding myself.

so cheer up la. at least u saw light already

deathscythe99 SG

I think that being her listening ear should be all you should do at this stage, knowing she has a bf. Smile

Just friends, and nothing else.

Oyathatsme SG

Don't be a silly goof and do all that stupid things you did to her. Stop hanging on. Don't be a dumb fool and find a new chick. Get her hint.

bratpig SG

thanks for your advice, am trying to do that now. unsure of the result tho

joai28 SG

well, thanx for ur advise dude, i have already moved on and stopped calling her. Instead, sometimes she calls me occasionally and jokingly asked y am i nt calling her and she always the one making those calls? Though i still answer her calls, but tats mainly because i do not want things to turn ugly in the sense that i still believe in our friendship n do not want to aggravate it but tat does not mean she can take me for granted and gains attention from me whenever she wants to. I still have my pride and shall not be an idiot clinging n waiting for her...

bratpig SG

I'm being an idiot?

Yes I know, but hard to do otherwise.

starExcaliblur SG

u r not alone, there r quite a lot out there, I m 1 of them

timble SG

I waited for a guy (while he was unattached but liked other girls) for a a few yrs... I was always there everytime he needs to talk. At the end of it all, he felt that we were better off as frens. I was glad that he was unattached then else things would be complicated. However, it was also because of the fact that he was unattached tat it kept me waiting.

Not in a gd position to advice as I am bugged by other issues as well, but I feel that it is always better not to hang on.
Imagine if you were the bf and knew about the guy who would always be there for your gf when you quarrel... Razz

Tat's what's happening to me now. A girl has been waiting for my bf...she said that she will wait for him forever. And it's not doing the relationship any good cos he always mention about her when we quarrel. It can be testing sometimes...to the point that I keep asking myself..will he be happier with her.

Perhaps ask... would you be able to give the girl of your dreams more happiness than her current bf? Does she show concern for you when you need her?
If your answers are no... pls move on. If yes... then maybe there's really a reason, though not a gd one, to hang on.

starExcaliblur SG

[quote]Originally posted by timble:
[b]
Tat's what's happening to me now. A girl has been waiting for my bf...she said that she will wait for him forever.

Dunno think the girl will wait 4ever unless she want 2 heck care abt her family members, relatives, friends, her age (possibly after 30+) n her own biological clock tat will urge her 2 settle down

And it's not doing the relationship any good cos he always mention about her when we quarrel. It can be testing sometimes...to the point that I keep asking myself..will he be happier with her.

Well, hv faith in yr relationship, without it, insecurities might appear

Devil1976 SG

Hmm....

« Previous Page