need some help from everybody here

~Numb~ SG

need some help from all the forumite here...
how can i get this gal to open up to me??? yeah i noe tat she been thru a bad r/s like 3 years ago....her b/f of 3 year cheated her and got his ex-g/f pregnant. no choice haf to leave her...and this gal loved the b/f so much...i think she's still tinking of him although she said she hated him for treating her like this. I got to noe her when she broke up with her b/f and although i think i'm being treated like a rebound b/f...i feel happy, cos she's really a nice gal...just the kind i like!!!! But i haf to go NS(damn) and she would not reply to my sms since den sort of lost contact with her, but surprisingly after NS(two years later, just tryin my luck and msg her), she started responding to my sms again...so wat does this mean? i haf a chance?

But i still nv had a chance to get her out on a date...weekend she will go back to m'sia where her home is, stay there till sunday nite come back....monday is back to work again...weekdays can't ask her out, cos both of us are doin p/t dip..she's in 4th yr, whereas i'm in 2nd...clash of schedule again...

since then it's been two year le...i like this gal very much...the gal of my dreams....at least to me....
but i'm having trouble getting her to go out with me...hai...or just opening up to me........
whenever i msg her...eg. Hi morning, so you haf lesson 2nite? wanna meet up after that?
her reply will be either "yes" or just a single word reply....
maybe i'm getting my hopes too high....am i?

What can i do guys??? pls help me....i really wanna make it work out...

No_Problemo SG

onli 1 advise, I think you are still too young to get serious in a r/s. maybe this is just puppy love

_Aaron_ SG

I never liked smsing people who don't respond.
Try calling instead.

For everything else, its a bit too early to judge, but i think you're indeed being used as a rebound boyfriend. This relationship seems to be very one sided.

To protect your heart, i suggest you don't place so much hope on this relationship. She may be your dream girl, but the chances of you getting her in reality seems to be rather remote...

Sometimes you have to wake up a bit and looks around you, instead of thinking about your dreams everytime..

gerrykoh SG

I guess if u are still keen u have to make time.

Meet her in the morn for breakfast or lunch time. Find out her schedule.
I'm sure both of u don't study every day right?
For a r/s to progress, u need to spend time together.
If it is not possible, then forget abt. it

[email protected] SG

Does she know u like her? Hmm...y not u approach her in another direction? Try using different ways to get near her. Instead of sms her try to call her or even try to msn her? But don make her feel like u r trying to tie her down...

Stm a simple msg means lots of ting like Gd Morning or even Nitez...as long as she reply means she care abt the msg (unless u hear her msg tone like very impatient or don wanna talk with u)

Anyway good luck to u Very Happy if ting cant work out well...don insist...get out of it and find other gals (u sure say as if its easy)

Devil1976 SG

Was she ever your gf?

~Numb~ SG

was she my g/f?
no Sad
i was just like....there...for her....
we just hang out a lot and was close, but not to the extend of being bf and g/f
she noe that i like her...

What i noe is that she's currently not attached, got guys want to woo her...but she rejected them...why?? i don't noe...so i'm just hoping ba...

like Aaron said....maybe i shuld stop dreaming...hai..

it's hard to get her out, morning she need to work...go out @7...works in jurong area...whereas i work in marsiling side....
studies-wise....it's three day in a week....but clash with hers...only fri free for both of us...but she's go back to m'sia after work....
so any chance of asking her out is dashed!!! Sad

During NYE i msg her.....she's at home...by herself...shuld haf ask her out...damn!!!

Devil1976 SG

SLIM...

~Numb~ SG

i know it's slim oe close to none....that's why i'm asking help from you guys...
how can i make this slim hope to something better....
C'mon guys....i'm sure you can give me more constructive advices....
thanks

Devil1976 SG

Where she stays in Malaysia?

Try to make better use of the Friday... And weekends as well... Don't have to be she staying late in Singapore as you can imagine it'll be very much inconvenient for her also.. If you like to (but note that more ventures don't necessarily means more return..), you can try going over to Malaysia to spend time with her over the weekends... Create opportunities to be down in Malaysia and reasons for meet ups...

I can say it's pretty limited for a start on your part... In a relationship, it always take 2 hands to clap... If she's not interested, no point pushing it also....

foxwalk SG

i don't understand why so many people will hold on for so long..

you need feeling + timing:
if either of them is missing, it's a wrong match! why do you evn bother?

UHU SG

How about telling her you would like to visit malaysia in the weekend and if you two can go together?

~Numb~ SG

i tink foxwalk is rite...
just ask her if she wanna go out 2molo(fri) for dinner after work...
i tink she's not studying....but no reply from her...
hai...time + feeling....really very impt...
it's lost 2 years ago....
Everything is useless.... Sad
Life is so......maybe there is greener pasture.....
Cheers...thanks everybody...

parn SG

Hmm...from what I can see, she is just treating you as a normal friend. And the way you are treating her is also pretty normal as a friend. Smile

I know that you like her...but do give yourself and her the chance to know more about each other first. Be her friend and know more about her first and allow her to know more about you first. For all you know, you may not be the one she is looking for...as in the personality, appearance and behaviour. And she might not be the one you are so in love with after you have know her long enough. Smile

And yes, you are really getting your hopes too high up. Don't flatter yourself by thinking that she will like you simply without knowing you enough. Girls are not as easy as you imagined. They have their insecurities as well as concerns. Smile Well...in a relationship, girls are usually the ones who lose out. Sad So they have to make sure that this is the right guy for them first before they are prepared to go into a relationship with the guy.

I can only tell you to take things naturally as it comes. Smile
One tip though...if a girl is interested in you, she won't and will never do anything to cause you any hurt...before she step into a relationship with you. Smile Very Happy

Hehehe..hahahaha....good luck! Mr. Green

keuriseudo SG

Well ~numb~, I've read ur replies. Looks like the previous one u sounded a little hopeless, helpless and feel like giving up. Am I right? Or am I wrong?

Anyway.. if I were you, I'll take things a step at a time. Being friends with the girl you like or are attracted to is not a wrong option. But the big MISTAKE is to be TOO nice to the girl you r attracted to, which gives her a signal that you r falling for her.

Below are some tips tt may help u, maybe not for the current situation but it's meant for future uses... if need to.

Some tips though:
1. Take two steps forward and one step backward.
2. Mystic is the key to turn on the attraction.
3. Men are on/off switches, women are volume knobs.
4. Never be too nice to a girl (even if u know one for quite some time), because they will very soon take you as a normal friend once you overdo it.
5. If there's any chance, try to get her to chase you around trying to beat you up for what you said or done to her. Do it frequently though... Wink

Well, for a start, tt's all I can offer to help u for now.. hope you can "get it".
If you don't "get it", you may take ur time. Wink

parn SG

Hahaha...i hate your tips, those are really evil tips. Razz

Devil1976 SG

The background would be difficult for development... My advice for now ould be... Make much certainty that she at least show some interest in you before you approach further....?

keuriseudo SG

If u r a girl, thanks for the compliment! Cool
If u r a guy.. u may use those tips or forget getting a girl, whether she's a sex partner or a girlfriend. Period.

Well... tips ain't evil or good btw... it's just a guideline to follow. What's more important is that one would go and try things out themselves. If they fail, try again. That's what it is all about.