Problem in balancing life

Bubbly123 SG

Hi, i really need help in this area... especially wish to hear advices from gals.. I used to be very sexually active with my bf.. around 4 times a week at least.
and we have been together for almost 1 year.

But for the past 3 months, i found myself dreading having sex with him at all times... i just kinda find it irritating, and i began to doubt my feeling for him..
The problem here is, i do miss him a lot when he is not around, i like spending time with him, but the problem is "I dread having sex with him".. is this normal between loved one????

And it's not like i have low sex drive or what, i'm still very interested in engaging in sex, however i don''t feel like doing it with my bf.. I'm not suggesting tt i'm fooling around outside or what, just tt i wish to find out whether there's anyone feeling the same way as me...

i really need help in this issue, cos my bf is beginning to qn me y im no longer interested in having sex with him....

_Aaron_ SG

Well, looking from a guy's point of view. (Sorry i'm not a girl, hope you don't mind.)

It may be just that the sex is getting boring. Have you tried different styles? There's more than 1 way of having sex after all.

There are lots of books, websites, on teaching you the various techniques.

But if sex becomes boring, maybe he's doing it the wrong way *shrugs*

Happened to my friend once, he actually told me he's getting bored of sex. Hmm, maybe you can compare it to having dessert. Initially when you first get it, its good. But after eating it 4-5 times a week for a year... you can get sick of it i guess.

Maybe you could lay off it a while too.

But once again, i may be totally wrong about what you're feeling. Hope i'm able to be at least a little help though.

Marmalade Boy SG

Its either you try new ways of having sex or you lay it off for a while.
There are only 2 choices from the way i see it. Mr. Green

Bubbly123 SG

well.. i been rejecting him for the past 2 months, keep delayin sayin i not feelin well, or i need time to "pei yang" passion...

and there's nothin wrong with his techniques, and we are a quite adventurous couple, always trying diff things..

But now, i just lost interests in having sex with him entirely... i still like him, and i enjoy spending time cuddling with him... but it's this sex issue that i'm afraid will make him drift further.(he got very high sex drive)

and i dun wish to force myself to engage in sex just be'cos of his needs... I feel that one should enjoy it before you do it... Sad

_Aaron_ SG

Oh... perhaps deep down you feel like he likes you for your body, and not yourself?

Perhaps you can have a talk with him. Tell him that if he respects you for who you are, "and i dun wish to force myself to engage in sex just be'cos of his needs... I feel that one should enjoy it before you do it... " exactly what you have told us.

But since he has a high sex drive, there may be a problem. What needs to be done is a compromise, talk to him, tell him your feelings, and see what he says. There may just be a win-win situation for both of you..

_Aaron_ SG

double… dang, my Internet connection sux. ~

Marmalade Boy SG

You should have a good talk with him and let him know why you feel like that.
But touch wood, ok?
If he cannot control himself, he might do something stupid.
From the way you reply, i think that you need time to settle yourself first before doing anything else.
If he likes or loves you as much, he will be willing to wait.