Hmm its that season again. With less than 48 hours to
Valentines Day, weve had crash-and-burn stories from
Ice_princess83 and LazerLordz - theres plenty of space on the
casualty list.
Were I to be younger and more cynical, Id be asking, What the
hells the point? Youre just running into brick walls for no good
end.
No, no, no, no, no!
As Singapore Tyrannosaur has proposed within another context, take
a look at the bigger picture. Whats the object of the dating game,
people?
Is it to zero in on The One (pardon the mathematical pun)? Perhaps.
But is the one in front of you The One?
In all of the Valentines-Day-related threads that I have seen,
there are many posters here with a tale of woe to tell, myself
included. Certainly one has to give oneself time to grieve and get
accustomed to the new set of circumstances, but at the same time I
see a lot of cynicism floating about on this forum.
Make no mistake about it, people cynicism is only a paper-thin
disguise for cowardice.
Zen is predicated upon three simple metaphorical statements:
A mountain is a mountain and water is water
A mountain is not a mountain and water is not water
A mountain truly is a mountain and water truly is water
Though I am not a Buddhist, much less a Zen Buddhist, this
philosophy has always struck me as making a hell of a lot of sense.
We start out naïve, taking everything at face value. As we go
along, we learn that not everything is as it seems, so we treat
every new thing with disbelief and cynicism. However, we reach a
higher level of understanding of the ways of the world, by which we
take the trouble to assess everything on its own merits, and as
such develop an understanding and acceptance of the true nature of
everything that is how we get past cynicism. The Zen Buddhists
hold that not everybody reaches that ultimate stage, because it
takes a lot of soul-searching and effort to get there.
From the number of people in their mid-40s and onwards who stay
stuck in a world of cynicism, hell, Id say that them Zen guys are
right.
Can I blame people for proving them right? Hell, no. Lets face it
life has a tendency to knock us around like pinballs. Regardless
of our insight and intellect, theres always going to be at least
one thing thats going to come all the way out of left field to
clobber us right in the temple. Get yourself knocked around enough
times, and if youre half-smart, youll know the meaning of
fear.
If we bring up the topic of fear, it is almost inevitable that we
bring up courage. Courage is not a question of not having fear.
Indeed, I pity the man who knows no fear life will find a way of
arranging an introduction between him and fear, and he will not
know what to do then. Courage is acknowledging your fear, embracing
it and working your way through it. Dammit, the human race has
gotten to where it is on that principle.
So go out, experience, push the boundaries, hit the wall, feel
fear, face it and by God, work through that fear, for that is what
makes you human. As the Bear says, Love! Damn the
consequences!.
Happy Valentines day, people.
