Needed Advice

last SG · 2004-02-20T20:48:18+00:00

Do you want me to close this thread for you?

Prec|ous SG

This thread is closed.

Lingos SG

Precious.. lingos used to have a bf that was really busy. But cos i was lifeless and friendless at the tender age of 19. I was really upset that i couldn't contact him anytime.

If he's at work, i think you should understand that it's hard to get time to do your personal stuff doing work. Especially if he's organising road shows. He's not at a desk sitting there doing nothing. When you get a job later.. you'll understand what i mean.
So MS A, your friends who say that he shouldn't treat you like that obviously have bfs who are in school and has nothing to do. If you want to be with someone that's older than you (I'm assuming he is) then you have to understand that he has work commitments. And be prepared to not see him for a long time. Unless you are dumb like I was once, and bring lunch to him. URGHHHH, the embarrassment of what i did when i was young!

Prec|ous SG

Why sad that u r dumb by bringing lunch to him..lolx.

Ya, think understood that he is being bz,but should at least with straint the attitude of being hostile rite?

Lingos SG

Well.. cos I am now a really busy person. And to think i went all the way from Gleneagles to Taka to SP to bring someone lunch is ridiculous. After that, i get on a bus and go home!? I should have just gone home instead of running around cos I had swollen face and everything after my operation. AHhaha.. i write it off to youth.

Heheh.. i can't imagine doing it now. I wouldn't even be bothered to drive 1/2 hr to meet my boyfriend for lunch even if i'm not working.

Lingos SG

Honey.. if you had a strict deadline to do, and you're getting interrupted. Sometimes it's hard to restrain the tone. Maybe on the phone it's hard to like tell what he is really feeling. Once i was drivng and my bf was calling me cos i was late. I answered and said i'm driving, can't talk and slammed the phone down. But he knew that i didn't mean to be rude. You know what i mean?

Prec|ous SG

i see. what are u working as? so how do u mainatian ur r/s then? no contacts no meet up?

Lingos SG

Ohh.. I see him everyday. Hahaha...

But when i'm home with him, usually we do our own things. He'll be on his notebook, i'll be on the pc or watching tv.

Prec|ous SG

haiz.... Crying or Very sad
then mine no use liao lor...

Lingos SG

What are you doing up at this hour?

PMed you anyway.

Paperboat SG

i feel what lingos has said is true. the amt of stress in organising a roadshow for the next day is extremely huge. that explains why the guy sounded frustrated.

also, did it ever occur to the both of them that sms can be a poor medium for communication? //Quote: "i think you are real busy or you wun bother..." Ms. A could meant well when she said this. but how would a stressful guy react and perceive this sentence? sometimes, nothing beats a phone call.

it could just be a case of misunderstanding. not necessary a change in heart on the part of B. if so, he wouldn't even have bothered to call back again.

btw precIous, u are a night owl!!!

BrUtUs SG

mayb he reali very stress, so cannot reali conclude he change of heart or wat lor... but if he reali busy, during his rest time can still give u sms mah... but give him a break, send him motivation sms daily so he still noe u still care...

Devil1976 SG

SUBJECTIVE. Based on the above alone, it's certainly not enough to prove much. Could very well be just a frustrated man's response though he might be genuinely caring to his gf. Then again, there's no evidence to prove that there's nothing wrong too?

A word of advice... If things are pretty groundless, don't go about wildful guessings.... It's unhealthy and would probably hurt the relationship in one way or another in time to come....

Regards.

Prec|ous SG

He is in sales line..& i dun think so he really haf any fixed rest time. i do send him encouragement sms once in a while n he reply me nothing. Kinda of sad to see no response fm him when i send an encouragement or a miss u sms.

Prec|ous SG

btw precIous, u are a night owl!!!

When i wrote the msg in the beginning, i couldnt sleep cos it was bothering me esp. when the so called "accquataince" fren keep telling me he is having a 2nd gf outside w/o any basis, & he concluded that bcos of his attitude to me.

When u reply me, it was abt 10.30, singapore time. Laughing

RainbowPrincess SG

Hi Precious,

Pls refer to my reply in the thread, "Something Wrong?", which was previous also posted by u.

RP

Paperboat SG

precious, since you yourself admitted that those are just words of an acquaintance, then you shdn't take it to heart. she might be just kind or otherwise when she said that, but most important is that you must trust your bf.

when u truly love someone, u dun hold back. give your guy the benefit of the doubt ok and have faith in him. cheer up Wink

lyling SG

Guys hate it when gf says things like u dont bother…used to do it when not married….always starts a fight. Now i noe when i want hubby to call me….i sms him and tell him things like….i miss u….i m thinkin of u….. wish to see u soon or when he bz wif work….kempetai…..he always try to call….it gets him in a lovey dovey mood and he tries to come home as soon as his project finishes.

Prec|ous SG

the problem is he wun reply sms for msges like miss u, love u, or any encouragement sms to ask him to jia you. He reply me sms that needed to be reply like enquiries or gg out. I noe guys got some dislikes on wat their gfs do. But it feel so strange for me for me that we neber communicate for days n i dun even noe wat is gg on for him..maybe i should juz leave him alone. Not to say meet up.. it even worst. He had no time for it..

lyling SG

My hubby didnt like the fact that i too sticky. So i got around problem by finding things to do when he not around. he got more “kan cheong” when he realised i was more indepdt. but i always assure him i would be there 4 him. i make more effort by cooking him a good meal when he comes home from work…btw i work too but still make effort. sometimes by letting go a little, it gives him room to breathe and he comes back more, its like flyin a kite …every relationship is unique…..u need to noe what works for ur guy.

lyling SG

BTW communication needs time….i took a lot of time (a few years in fact) to train him to talk to me…..now he tells me abt his day at work, the good….the bad, everthing….what he had for lunch….i also tell him abt mine. i try to pamper him more when he has a bad day. he doesnt need advice, just a listening and sympathetic ear.