It's that feeling again

Farmer Brown SG

Argh… its that feeling again!!! was watching that stupid trista and ryan’s wedding… dun know if they made it and i dun really care.. the whole point is that i’m feeling that.. erm.. just lousy..lonely..helpless feeling.. why?

wuming78 SG

hm… find a partner urself lor..

the Bear SG

friends help...

you in singapore? go to the outings organised.. make friends Smile

who knows? maybe you'll find your partner in life in one of them? or something?

or just have a good time Smile

Farmer Brown SG

i dun think finding a partner's the solution.... i think stabbing my heart... taking it out and leaving it out to dry would work...

wooo

great...

my ex just told me a friend of mine (one of my bestest buds in pri school, same age as me... but now sadly far apart) is getting ENGAGED... the first of our generation i guess.. sigh

wuming78 SG

well if tts ur choice, den widen ur social circle and make more frens. but i can tell u: frens r frens. they stil wont be able to fill certain parts of ur heart.

loads of my frens of my age or younger haf engaged or even married! tts life man, and well.. haf to accept tt romance does not come to us all equally. Wink

wuming78 SG

the Bear SG

you're still pining for her?

any chance? if not, let go?

start to heal... everyone can...

in the meantime, like i said, go do stuff? people here are here for for if you want to...

in the meantime, be well yah? Smile

Yunhaier SG

Singles always envy loving couple without realising how much rainstorm they have to go through before they are so happy with each other.

You can see everything, about couple and the sweetness of being together on every corner of a street (people hugging, kissing, holding hands, etc), but you never see their problems and rarely see couple quarrel in the middle of the street. (It happens but you witness how many hands-holding-one-another before you encounter one argument?)

Psychological theory about reinforcing works here. We kept seeing the goodies and we long for the goodies of love - then whois going to handle and love all that problematic side of relationship? Rolling Eyes

Cheers

Farmer Brown SG

i don't think its about a girl. i don't think its about love. i think that the trista and ryan thing just triggered off a problem i have..

a passing acquaintance thinks that my problem is that i dun love myself enough.

do u?

Farmer Brown SG

yun.. i think the prob goes deeper... on the surface it seems i miss that feeling or something.. but i dun think so... i think that acquaintance was right... i dunno if i love myself enough therefore i might need someone to love me more then a normal person does...
sounds silly doesn't it?

really... sometimes i just think its damn stupid and embarassing to say this out so publicly....esp when someone has seen me before..

Yunhaier SG

People that don't love themselves seek source of that love outside themselves. Its true - though not exactly like the way replenishing does, but rather, your low confidence and esteem in yourself made you believe that this confidence and esteem has to come from that 'special' girl whom will make you flare and feel whole - like never had before.

Magnetic theory states that you attract what you display. People who don't love themselves attracts mates that abuse them or generally don't treat them as well as a good couple should be behaving towards one another. Self-love makes you feel protective and therefore, an obvious suffering relationship would have greatly-reduced-in-chance of surfacing.

P.S: Keep smiling. Think the right way and start the day right. Only you have the power to love yourself. Nobody else can make you do it. Idea

Cheers

the Bear SG

ahh...

loving yourself...

maybe, each day, find something about yourself you've done right, write it down?

after a while, see that you're a pretty okay person Smile

not too sure if it'll work but heck.. worth a try?

coz, think about it... you are worth the effort, right? Smile

i would think so Smile

be well... soon, you'll love yourself well enough Smile

Farmer Brown SG

i like the last line... but i dun feel inclined to do it at the moment... i prefer to ignore it and just sleep on it or run away from it when i occurs

Farmer Brown SG

thanx for trying.. but i've got to be brutally honest.. it isn't easy to find that motivation to even try to love oneself... maybe i should just rot and die...

the Bear SG

where there is life, there is hope...

it is darkest before the dawn... been there before... mayhap one day i'll visit that place again... coz most of us do...

pick yourself up yah? can one! Smile

even when i don't know you, i'll pray for you... coz somewhere up there, He knows who you are.. and hopefully, He'll show you the way somehow...

be well yah? Smile

Farmer Brown SG

i really appreciate the concern..seems that i live in antartica and my darkness has been lasting for months

and i dun believe in Him... i might have last time... but since he's supposedly the one that controls our lives, he isn;t doin a good job with mine so i rather we leave him out of this

the Bear SG

He allows us free will... to do what we can...

sometimes He puts obstacles in our way.. allows us to learn... and grow... to be stronger... cannot seek to understand Him for He moves in mysterious ways...

my darkness lasted for months too.. and it seemed like an eternity and then some... but came out of it, wiser perhaps, but i've learnt and grown...

i hope you do too...

with free will, comes responsibility...

like yun said... only we can do something about our lives..

again, i hope you will be able to move on, out of your rut... coz like a vehicle stuck in a rut, it is hard to get out of it.. requires a lot of effort... sometimes a push too... but once you're out of it, you can move on...

Gedanken SG

FB, as John Lennon said, life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans.

There's two angles to that statement. First, you're seeing the end result and maybe you're trying to plan your way towards it. Well and good, but don't get too caught up in the plan - life has a funny way of saying "I think not". Case in point: I never figured out I'd be with someone like my girlfriend, but she's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

The second thing is that most people seem to forget that they're supposed to be enjoying the ride instead of worrying about the destination. Worry is interest paid on a problem that hasn't occurred yet - don't waste your time and energy on it. stay in the here and now - that's how you enjoy the ride. Besides, do you reckon you'd be more attractive to the ladies if you were having a good time or if you were moping? Even worse, when you mope, you tend to make yourself invisible - it becomes a vicious cycle.

RainbowPrincess SG

FB,

It really saddens me to noe tt u're again feeling lonely, etc. Is there anyone, a close fren, whom u can call & tok to?

There's alot for pple to like abt u. It's Not juz abt ur appearance, u haf a great sense of humour (damn sarcastic, I like Razz ), u're frank & honest, & u're fiercely loyal to a fren, even a fren u dunno tt well (u noe wat I'm tokking abt Smile ).

I'm sure as pple noe u even better, they'll uncover more thgs to like. Pls surround urself wif frens who care : )

RP