Not sure what is it

don_gn SG

I know this gal for quite some time, almost a year. We had not met each other face to face yet. We only communicate with one another th'u mail, sms and icq...............One day she phone to me, it was a nice feeling and we chat for quite some time. I not too sure is that love or just a crush on my part. As we had not met each other before and had not send pic of ourself to one another, I wonder how she look like. Movever we had a big age gap. I am 32 and she only 21. Should I woo her?

leexiancikevin SG

Shocked ... be frens first... go for a few dates b4 u do anything..

don_gn SG

I am not sure if she treat me as a friend or just her brother................................................... Embarassed

Master -_- SG

Dear Don_gn,

Internet relationships bear a huge risk on both you and her in terms of feelings and expectations.You should respect the idea that via the internet or telephonw, you can never fathom exactly what either one of you are conveying as communciation.

Another stumbling block appears to be the >10 year age gap that both of you are facing. Though love knowsn no boundaries but in this highly sophisticated world, unconditional love , unfortunately isn't that widely-accepted as a commited goal.

Ask her truthfully if what she is conveying are not mixed signals but indeed, true and sincere feelings. Work things out with each other and meet up. (IN A PUBLIC AND CROWDED PLACE!) Rolling Eyes

And, if things does not go according to plan, dun be disheartened because such things are not meant to be and you ought to deserve better.

Good Luck and Cheers Mr. Green

^cereal^ SG

I have a few questions which I hope you have the answers to them yourself...

Do you think you know her well? (Her characters, outlook, etc etc etc) You said you felt good when she called you, is it becoz of her voice? (Did she possess a nice voice, etc etc etc)

Given the advanced technology where people are really lacking in real-time interpersonal r/s, it's no surprised that you guys communicate in every form except meeting up face to face.

Then again, what is the reason for not meeting? Are you hesitant coz you are not sure if you can accept the superficial side of this girl? What if she turns out to be under your expectation? What if her voice don't match with her looks?

No real r/s can develop without having real time communication and meeting up with the each other. Is there something in reality which you're afriad of? Maybe not just you, but the girl as well.

Think about it, how can you fall for an ascii character? Someone behind the screen?

Meeting her in reality is always the best way out if you want to test for yourself if you're really into her.

p/s: Age is no barrier, besides age does not equates to mentality.

Cheerz...

boy in blues SG

Mr. Green x 2.

life SG

meet up 1st, the rest can wait….................

shutthehellup SG

well, in any case, u r jus making a guess..whatever u think may not be what she is thinking. so, it's best to think neutral, no hopes, nothing, and meet her up IF SHE WANTS TO... Laughing

Striker83 SG

since she is willing to chat with u on phone, i think she more or less got abit like u loh... so i think if u woo her, u will have high chances of winning her... cheer up~ Very Happy

Age is not a problem, love is all abt feeeeeeling...

Yunhaier SG

In the era we are living, internet is useful in our daily life, but its another risky tool of finding partner/soul mate.

Nothing can substitute the personal touch and communication face to face in any relationship. It's not only different - it's hell of a different when you speak to someone real life and someone virtually. Rolling Eyes

What you know about her is the impression she creates from merely words and probably with one phone call. Her voice sounded pretty sweet (totally bowl you over) and you 'think' that you fell in love with her.

Truth #1: You love her impression, you don't love her.

The big age gap is a problem - True love surmount all (Yes, I agree), however is it true love for you? Difficult to say, because you can't guarantee she can turn out to be what you expect her to be. (Subconscious, your mind has implanted a vision and image of how she would be like when you see her - this included character and physical looks) Rolling Eyes

What she wants in a bf emotionally, physically, mentally is VERY DIFFERENT from what you want vice vista. For a 32 years old guy - probably you will be thinking of marriage, but how sure can you say for a 21 years old lady?

P.S: Before you attempt anything, be sure to understand what you are doing. Its foolish to woo a girl based on impression alone and with 11 years difference - this is indeed very high risk IF you are looking for a fulfilling relationship. You can heed your heart - but don't ever think back and regret what you have did. Life is full of decision, just make sure you always look forward and never turn back. Rolling Eyes

Cheers