how to win a girl back?

last SG · 2003-06-18T23:14:24+00:00

What makes you so sure that you would wanna win her back in the 1st place..?

the Bear SG

yah... but a fool in love will try to move the world if he thought it would win her back..

i know Smile

pinkish purple papayas SG

ok... for all u guys...

have u people ever been rejected by a girl, reason being,

"xxx, my feeling for u are gone..."
"xxx, u treat me too good already..."
"xxx, its getting a bit montone...."
"xxx, frankly speaking, would we have a future together?"

"xxx, u are a person i am glad that i can truely communicate, but..."
"xxx, i made up my mind..."

it all begun when she slowly fell in love with me... and i do the same for her too....

she ask me to go slowly first....

pinkish purple papayas SG

i said ok... lets "test water" first....

soon all our friends knew.... all said the same thing,

"xxx!!! strike while the iron is hot!!!"

i dun really have much experience with love affairs.....
i begin to take an "aggressive stance" towards courting her....

dun u girls like a straightfoward guys? this time, i doubt so...

so in our outings,
i begin to hold her hand, she din brush me off.....
i begin to kiss her cheek, she din back off....
i begin to lean on her, she din shrug me off....

success? i was thinking.... yeah? was i nearly there? what wishful thinking.....

pinkish purple papayas SG

getting even bolder each time, i said......

"yyy, i love u...."

no reaction....
what is the meaning of no reaction? is she shy? i dunno... i just hope i am heading the right way....

soon, she gets colder... at every moment of my advances, through sms. emails, chats, outings....

can sense liao...something is wrong liao....

pinkish purple papayas SG

our last "conversation",

i ask, yyy, why did u like me in the first place?

"xxx, i like u, becos i find that we can communicate, but shouldn't we take things slowly? we are not in a relationship yet.... things that u do scares me off.... it has reverse effects on me... ain'nt we friends?

i tried giving myself chances, but i just cant help it... my feelings for u are gone... and i dun think it will come back.... i am sorry i misleaded u in the first place..."

pinkish purple papayas SG

the Bear SG

she's being honest with you....

appreciate it... time to move on... it hurts but hopefully, you'll learn and look back on this time.. maybe even fondly..

it takes 2 for a relationship... if she thinks you're not for her and has no feelings for you, there's nothing you can do... alas...

i wish you peace and serenity... and that you find your partner in time.. and with that, you will find joy Smile

pinkish purple papayas SG

what is wrong with me?

i know whats wrong with me....

haaai....she likes me for initially what i am, the more interesting, cocky side of me... for her i changed....i wanted to impress her, i impress too much liao....

i opened too many doors for her, i said too many thank yous, excuse mes, and sorrys, i never curse, never swear, never talk loudly.... i showed too much chivalry through my actions...

in other words... i showed way too much concern liao.... perhaps......perhaps........ she gets sick of all this...... perhaps the thrill is over.....

remembered this chinese saying,

"nan bu huai, nu bu ai"
"guy not bad, gals dun like"

hahaha...what a joke, i use to think these words only appear in tv shows... haaaai....how true....

why she doesnt like the good side of me? why doesnt she like my concern?

perhaps i spilled the bean too soon, by saying i love her....

the Bear SG

ask yourself.. are you good by nature?

if you are, don't lose that... else it's all a sham...

you'll find your true love one day... don't lose hope Smile

pinkish purple papayas SG

in our last conversation....

i said....cant u give me another chance?
she said...."this kind of things...how to give chances? there means there, not there means not there......"

i said....can we cool down?
she said ok....

i said....will the flame rekindle again after we cool down?
she said........."xxx, i dunno the future.... but i dun think so...."

its been almost a week..... on our cooling off stage...we have not contacted each other since....

please my dear forumers, how could i do to win her back?
tell me the tactics...
tell me the stategies....
tell me the ways.....
tell me ur experiences.....

thanks....

NeonTetra SG

take a rest from this thing first and wait and see…..no point rushing everything coz tt will screw up things again

^cereal^ SG

You still have her as a friend. Why are you so hard-up on it? I have the impression, die die you want her as a gf... sometimes I find that to gain a friend is better than losing her for the reason you are not willing to let go. It's not worth it. I mean, no one can tell what's in the future, but you can make the future. She said she don't think so the flame will be rekindled but then again, she is not quite sure herself. Why place your bets on the future?

The thing you have to ask yourself is 'Are you really what you are when you're with her?' Why put up with a false front trying to impress her so, in the end she thinks you're too much for her? Think along this line. If she loved you, she will be very willing to accept what you are. Don't build up a false impression of yourself in her. At the end, everything will be back at ground zero.

Take heart.All the best.

GIJOE SG

Sometimes when its gone and u know its gone, dont push too hard to get it back...its not gonna work. Since she dont have feelings for u...try to forget her although i know its hard...u gotta control yourself mentally n emotionally...give her up.

I still have feelings for my ex after we broke up for about 3 years now. She still finds me sometimes even though she had a BF, sometimes when we do go out, she would do things like we did before when we together.... but she will just disappear all of a sudden and then come back and disappear again. I used to think i still hold a chance in her heart but now i know its over..only after 3 years...

Dont hold on to e past..look forward to e future. I am now...still trying Neutral

pinkish purple papayas SG

haai... in our conversation.... perhaps i got a bit "siao".... i said....

"yyy, i dun want to be ur friend... i may cheating myself into self-beliefing we are just friends... i like u too much already... its hard to be just a friend...."

to come and think of it.... i din mean to say those words.... but..... its hard jst to be friends....

abterror SG

your situation has certain similarities of one of my relationship.
i guess they are just once lost and need company.
for my case, it ends when she found another guy.
good luck for ur case.
hopefully not the same as mine.

Devil1976 SG

"Like a ghost, she keeps coming back to haunt you... Like pieces of a reality.... You've created her 'existence'...."

Devil1976 SG

Probably... Cool

Devil1976 SG

Hmm... Reminds me of my 1st and 2nd courtship.... They probably had thought... "I love you? That's it....?" Rolling Eyes Oh well... Mr. Green > "

I figured out that you're probably still quite young..? No matter... There's still a long way to go in your life... Just because you've failed your 1st common test doesn't mean it's the end of the world (or your life...)...

There really isn't any GUARANTEED way that would get a girl back... Like what I've told bear... When something happens, it's usually not without a reason... (Causality - not an absolute law but is good enough to cover the MAJORITY...) What makes you think that you would 'want it back' without fully understanding WHY it happened in the 1st place? Who can guarantee to you that the same thing or worse won't happen in the future...?

And BESIDES... She was never really yours in the 1st place...? How can you have something 'back' if you've never even own it in the 1st place...? Rolling Eyes

^cereal^ SG

But seems to me in your posts that you guys NEVER got together in the first plc. If so, there's never a beginning, whr's the ending? How to talk abt winning a gal back when you didnt even win her into your arms in the very first plc? I dont quite get it. Question

I won't say it's childish of you to think that it's hard to be friends. But I hope you think along the line that eventually all r/s starts off with friendship. If you both are not meant to be, shouldnt it be back to square one which is FRIENDSHIP? Wink Think about it boy..

Good luck in your search for answers...

pinkish purple papayas SG

yah... we din even go steady in the first place....
talk about getting a girl "Back"? Rolling Eyes
hahaha.....

perhap i would like to rephase that,

"i still like her.... what should i do now?"

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