last week marked the new status, i single after 10 months of
attachment. she tell me all of this in a cold tone which make my
heart ache till the max on the phone. sorrie guys and gals that i
have to make use of this forum to grumble!
here is my story!
we all started to know each other in australia, that time all of us
were study at australia. get to know when my friends and me
finished touring mel and syd and back in brishane. at that time,
didnt really take notice. but somehow chemistry did place through
day of plotluck (dont know if i spell right, it asking u neighours
to preparing some dishes or to cooking at u places and eat dinner
together) i guess fate do played a part in bring ppl together.
after sometime, we were official a pair. that time i agree life is
filled up with sweetness and happiness. going to some outing, enjoy
the stroll at brishane river.
but then some problem started, another girl appear on the horizon.
it was actually my first love, she say she wish to patch up with
me. it was then i fall into the darkness of confusion! plus that
the fact that she had to study in australia for 5 year for her PHD,
as a result i init break up with her. till now i still can rem her
expression on her face. i feel guilty! i did tell her about my
first love but in the end we were still back together and. i was
touched by her love!
from that time onward, our relationship strengthen a lot! and we
begin to talk abt our future like meeting our parents, how many
childrens we shall have, the type of housing we shall have. at time
we did have our share of arugments but soon we would iron it out.
and it seem like we strengthen each time when we recovered from our
arugment. deep in my heart, i know that she was the one for me in
this life. and i begin to bring her home and my parent were very
happy with the gf i was with. that time i ready to make a
commitment!
when her holiday ended and she was back in aust, i try to make her
security when icq, phone call (she call as it cheaper), send card
now and then to add spices to the LDR. i wann to make her feel
security with a faithful rather than a relationship which is rocky.
i try to giver her support in everything she do to reduce her study
stress. as she is undergoing a lot of shiting things, like study,
friends, housemate and looking for new places. and both of us
looking forward for this june holiday when i will fly to australia
to spend time with her. and i have even call her dad to seek his
advise of some business thingy and it seem like i have pass her
parent stage! and soon all hell break lose! she dont sms me that
often and she dont return my sms... i was lose! she was so gentle
the week b4 and she changed to another person on the phone. i cant
feel the gentlness and connection anymore. we had a long talk on
the phone and she stated her reason. that was the 5 year of study
and she was frustrtured with the relationship. she also say that no
other guys was in the picture.
these few days was like hell for me! flashes of image keep
appearing on my mind esp night time. memory of everything... card
that she send, stated that she will love me 4ever. it all gone....
all gone with the wind...i try to patch back with her but she is
having her exam and i dont wish to pester her so much. and i
planning to continue on with my trip to australia in end of june.
some of u may thing i silly, i shd just recover and moved on. but i
thinking to myself "She worth more than an airticket, a $642 buck
air ticket can be earned back with 5 OT. and she is the love of my
life! and i nt going to let it go so easy. right now my heart is
only half dead, what i really wish for is that my heart to be fully
alive or fully dead when i left australia. i just wanna to look at
her, her eyes, her expression. i just wanna to say the words
straight from her mouth even it will shatter my heart into million
of pieces." last night i just sm her if she allow me to stay at her
place when i at australia and she agree on it. i tot to myself i
still got chances. but she sms me to ask me the reason why i going
back to austrlia. i tell her the truth and she immediately forbid
me to stay over at her side. i guess it normal.
i really hurt inisde when she say it all. i guess i just have to go
back to australia to decide. guys and gals, i really feel lousy at
such times and i will appreicate if u all dont start to flame me.
thank! and anyone with similar exp care to share with me..
thank..... 
