We have been going on for 2 and a half yrs. She is my first and
me her first too. She is 24 and me 23. She is working while I'm
studying. We always discuss abt marriage and tat we will ROM when I
complete my studies.
We hv very difficult parents, especially my dad and her mum. Her
mum was the one who approve of me when she found out abt our
relationship after several months of testing out. I talked to her
mum several months, persuading her like mad and finally she
approved. I was very happy then. At tat time, I didnt tell my dad
as I was still studying. He sure disapproves of the relationship.
Furthermore, he wants my gf to be of a high educational background
as me but it turns out otherwise. After several months, I told him
tat i found a gf after my gf revealed tat she does not like tis
feeling of not being recognised by my family. And as I expected, my
dad got mad and scolded me and confronted my gf on the phone. He
explained tat I was still studying and told her to leave me alone.
She was very sad at tat time and started disliking my dad and
wanted to leave me. After much persuasion, we were together again.
As time goes by, my dad didnt say anything anymore, though I know
tat he does not wish me to hv gf as it takes up a lot of my time
and will leave me distracted if we were to encounter many
problems.
After these were settled, now comes her mum problem. From wat I
heard from my gf, since small her mum has not allow her to do
anything at all. Till now for the past 2 nd half yrs, we hv not
gone out on a proper date. Only sometimes, she will allow her to go
out with me fr 1230 onwards on sat and return home before six. She
did not allow her to use the phone for too long or surf the net at
all. She practically wants her daughter to stick with her for 24
hrs. Tats ridiculous! In the end, its always me who goes to her
house and no where else! There was many occasions where i and her
mum quarrel. I even quarrel with my dad over tis when he once found
out tat i was always talking to her mum on the phone. Her mum
always wan to talk to me when I call my gf...talk and talk and i
talk to her more than i talk to my gf. very frustrating. tat happen
for abt 2 yrs and i sometimes will complain to my gf. Sometimes i
was feeling so frustrated tat i pick quarrels with my gf on the
small things she does. Several times I told her tat we break up.
But on the same day, we patch back again cos i cannot live without
her. I know she luvs me a lot too.
On one occasion, e mum kept calling my house to look for me to
clarify some things with me. She is always suspicious over both of
us, tat we r hiding some things fr her and lying to her. There were
some times when my gf took leave and went out with me but was
caught by her mum. She was angry and quarrelled with my gf and even
fight each other out on several occasions. Tat was when she called
me to ask y we did such a thing...going out secretly. To us, her
mum does not allow us to go out together, wat can we do except to
hide fr her. But i avoided her calls and she tried to question my
family members where i am although she knows tat Im at home. My
father got to know bout tis and scolded me tat I would not got into
tis mess if I had listeded to him. I was very angry and argued with
him. He got so mad and call the mum. He was shouting on top of his
voice to her mum and my gf's brother took over the phone. My father
was scolding vulgarities and told her brother to tell my gf to stop
bothering me.
From then, my gf started to dilake my family. She stopped calling
my house. She said she will sms me when she is looking for and wont
call or come to my house anymore. I was extremely sad. I still
continue to go to my gf house despite of all tis things cos its the
only way to get to see her. Sometimes after her wk, I secretly meet
her for just 20 min before she goes home cos she must reach home on
time before she gets it fr her mum. When we quarrel, we always
bring out our parents. She is always blaming my dad while I blame
her mum. But its obvious tat her mum started everything first! Y my
gf wants to pick on my dad. She does not wan to come my house, does
not wan to stay with my parents after marriage. Or tis I dun care
though Im sad, now she does not even wan to call my house. even if
she calls, she puts down the phone upon hearing others voice. I
always get mad and quarrel over tis with her. All tis things make
me frustrated over the yrs and i always pick quarrel with her. Im
thankful tat despite my bad temper, she's still with me though her
temper is equally bad! Recently, when we quarrel, she ask whether I
can compromise with each other...Y I am always picking quarrel with
her? I told her tat if she cant compromise with me, y shd I
compromise with her? it goes on and on....
Im very troubled, frustrated, angry, sad and always feel tat we r
not compatible. Always thinking of breaking up with her. On the
other hand, I really cant do without her.
Can someone pls advice?
