just a bit of advise for the girls:
if the guys treat you like a substitute - BREAKUP!
i don't get it with youth today. the message is simple:
1) LOVE SURFACES YOUR PAST HURTS
Yes, it is true that every single time you really love someone,
your past hurts, anger, pain, regret, and all the repressed
feelings you've kept inside WILL surface. Why? Simply because love
creates a comfortable environment where you are not afraid to come
face to face with your hurts. However, most couples treat this
entire thing wrongly and end up quarelling. The solution is to tell
what we counsellors call "the complete truth". If anyone wants to
know more about this, you can reach me and I will be free to share
more. It will help heal many relationships.
2) LOVE IS PATIENT, LOVE IS KIND
Let's face it. Love is really patient and kind, it certainly does
not envy! So many teens I've spoken to tell me they envy their past
relationship and even if this one can't match up, it's ok. They
will remember the past and work out this one. Wrong, wrong, wrong!
You only end up with deception.
Let me give you a real-world example: Those guys who are into
pornography will end up with an IMAGE they set up in their minds
about girls and this carries on into any girl they have a
relationship with. The image of lust in their depraved minds then
disguises itself as love. In the end, a breakup happens and
everyone wonders what went wrong.
I'm trying to give a summary of what I need to say. It would
probably take an hour to speak everything about relationship
issues. Bottom line girls: If you're being treated as a substitute
or anyone other than YOURSELF, it's not worth keeping unless the
guy learns to get healed from his past (which you can help him do
by the way as spoken of in point 1).
Have an awesome day!
Daniel
