Friendship after Relationship?

Ixion SG · 2001-01-22T10:08:00+00:00

friendship after relationship may lead to many things like.....bi together again,become best friends or become tat kind of look like together but exactly not...

Ixion SG

After my previous relationship, that person said that I was cranky to ever think that two people can remain friends even after they stop seeing each other as a couple.

On the other hand, he believes in the Do or Die. Is break up an absolute loss of relationship & friendship?

Is the distinction usually so clear between relationship & friendship? Or has it got to do with 'having' a person?

One of my dearest friend was a partner for a long season, yet things weren't as ideal, so we assumed a better friendship.

Mum says I'm 'Angmoh' or 'English educated' (or liberal) while my Do-or-Die ex is 'Chinese-ed' who loves passionately.

Any comments?

moose SG

I think it is possible,but i seems that the long both are in the relationship,the harder it is to maintain a friendship after breaking up,but although it is hard,but is not impossible, Smile ))

SecMinHr SG

how abt relationship after frenship?
can pure platonic frenship ever exists? i believe over time...one party will definitely feel the itchy..hope this sparks off some reply...

cheers

moose SG

Call me idealistic if you may,i believe that a guy and a girl can have a true platonic relationship as i dun't believe in that itchy stuff,i have been friends with some girls for quite a few years and we are still platonic friends as we know we don't suit each other as other halves Smile ))

SecMinHr SG

well i have to agree with u, platonic frenship does exists, i have frens similar to yours too..gals kaki that cannot make it as couple ones.. Smile ..nonetheless..there is one..or two..that makes me feel the itch sometimes..haa..when i say itch..that does not applies to every female frens..but onni selected "fortunate" ones..hur hur
cheers

KenyonD SG

well when one is hurt by the other in the relationship, i realy doubt they can still be friends....especially if the one hurt feels that he/she found his/her true love and yet have to give up the relationship as the other half couldn't commit to the relationship....*sob sob* Sad

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Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

ZongXian SG

Ya, I believe in friendship after relationship coz afterall I am experiencing it now. It's hard and hurting but there seems to be no way I wanna lose her in any way. Still kinda hoping she would come back to me someday, when she has made up her mind. Right now, everything I do seems more of a friend than an ex, though funny at times, but at least I know I can still be with her, even as a friend.

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Spaces between our fingers are there so that another person's fingers can fit in them, I wish they were yours

Giggsy SG

Yup, I beleive in it!

As a matter of fact, my first gf is now one of my closest friend around. Absolutely platonic....although sometimes I thought of getting her back coz she knows me so well and is still so caring to me, but I had to put it off coz we both know that we are not meant to be together.

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Shake's in School

ZongXian SG

ya Giggsy, sometimes to just be together with the person you like/love is just enough, cause if you two are together again, you never know whether it will kill the chemistry, it's just so hurting everytime.

can't stand it...
i hate loneliness....
=~(

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Spaces between our fingers are there so that another person's fingers can fit in them, I wish they were yours

Atti SG

Friendship after relationship is possible, but then guess its a little funny seeing each other lor, esp if any1 of them still have feeling for the other party.

dreamingspires SG

On platonic friendship … we should get it clear that it is only meaningful to talk abt those friendship where we find that the other person really gets along well with us and someone whom we can really talk to … hmm sounds like someone you can spend the rest of your life with. So, I dun think platonic friendships exist.

SecMinHr SG

Sometimes, u can be such good friends, share so much stuff with each other, go thru real thick and thin together until such a point whereby u would miss her, think of her in the morning and before u sleep. Ended up confused and pertuded that whether u had fallen in love with her, or issit jus and “overwhelming” feeling of closeness – > platonism. Points to follow?

moose SG

I beg to disagree as i believe platonic relationships do exist as sometimes you may find a person whom you can really get along with as quoted above,but if that person is married or you know that your character and her don't match,so there is no basis for you to like her as i believe that for a relationship to work,both characters must be similar at some point,2 persons can be very good friends,but their characters can be as different as chalk and cheese Smile )))

Belle SG

i dun believe in long lasting platonic friends. I used to have quite a few close guy friends which i thought that we can be good friends forever. But somehow not long after, they want to be more than friends. But i am the kind of ger who draws a clear line between friendship and relationship. And so in the end , both of us felt so odd(especially me) that we eventually drift apart.
I do not know why but i have always encounter this problem. That is why until today, i dun have a close guy friend.

SecMinHr SG

Belle, in similar shoes, so its better to remain as solid good friends, and not to say or do anything foolish, at very least, the friendship could be salvaged

Dragonlance SG

I agree with sec belle...I have also a few girl - friends but no more than that...and i don't seem to be... drawn in anyway to them to become more than friends...
Anyway...now hehee who are we talking about..?

Ixion... i think that sometimes... guys like us just find it too hard to re-adjust ourselves back to the "good old days" when were just friends... Yes it do happens but sometimes, it just hurts too much inside... Like you, i am also English Educated...but i dun see what has that got to do with it all.

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"Love?" As i know, it starts with a smile, develops into a kiss and ends with a tear...

May GOD BLESS U!!!!

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In your service,
Dragonlance

Ixion SG

Dragonlance
I do agree with you that it isn't easy to 're-adjust' to friendship mode... takes a long time. Guess the issue lies in whether both parties are keen in resuming the friendship in the future.

I guess with regard to the ex-r/s I was referring to, it has been stated like 'die-die' never want to be friends again, and HATE for the rest of his life...

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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. -- A. Bierce

SecMinHr SG

I guess its a struggle to express to ur so called good friend at the risk of jeophardizing the friendship (cos things would neber be the same again) or just endure the agony of meeting up with her now and then, loving her with all ur heart but knowing that she can just be a good friend, and nuthing else, thus keeping mum abt the whole issue. Irony in life

dinnosaur SG

been there, done it..

it really depends on the type of person you are. if both parties are able to accept the fact that its "over", i dun see why friendship after a relationship is not possible.

stringray SG

If u feel comfortable seeing each other, then u can be frds. If u feel shy seeing each other, then dun be frds lah. It all depend if u are comfortable lah. Heeheehee :p :p :p

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* JuSt AnoTher StiNgrAy iN thE sEa *