The Electric New Paper :
SEX ADDICTION IN SINGAPORE
DOC: WORRYING TREND THAT CAN LEAD TO CRIME
DR Munidasa Winslow sees one sex addict a month but thinks this is
only the tip of the inferno.
By Ng Wan Ching
20 June 2005
DR Munidasa Winslow sees one sex addict a month but thinks this is
only the tip of the inferno.
And such addiction can lead to devastating consequences, including
crime.
Dr Winslow is a senior consultant psychiatrist and director of the
Community Addictions Management Programme (Camp) in the Institute
of Mental Health.
As with any appetite, he said, it can get excessive and
unnatural.
For example, a teenage boy came to see him recently for addiction
to Internet porn, saying he was thinking of progressing to touching
girls on the bus.
'We had to be very clear with him about the consequences if he ever
did something like that,' said Dr Winslow.
That is also an example of how with the Internet, the problem has
flared up even more, adding feul to the already active
flames.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Think of all the spam that you get. There are
people out there who are sending out porn messages every day. It's
very lucrative. You send out 10 million messages and if only half a
per cent of the people respond, you've got 50,000 customers.
'Sex is huge in Singapore and the rest of Asia. Just go to any of
these red light areas and you can see how much business is being
done,' said Dr Winslow.
With pornography so readily available, a sex addict can easily feed
his addiction which may lead to very serious consequences.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Many of the patients who come to see me have
either been caught by family members behaving in unacceptable ways
or who knows he is not behaving correctly.'
For every sex addict he sees, he knows there are many more he does
not see and who may not even realise they have a problem.
He recalled seeing some patients who were so obsessed with sex they
would do it with their spouse a few times in a day, then head out
to have more sex with prostitutes or masturbate with stimulation
from pornography.
Dr Tan Soo Teng, a consultant psychiatrist at Gleneagles Medical
Centre, agrees. He sees sex addicts once in a while.
Said Dr Tan: 'Many of them get into trouble with the law first.
When the police tells them to see a psychiatrist, they come to
me.
'But what we see is only a very small percentage.'
Dr Winslow is concerned enough to list sex as one of the four
behavioural addictions in the Camp website.
Internet addiction is also listed there.
There are five subtypes to Internet addiction among which sex and
love are featured:
# Cybersex addiction (compulsive use of adult web sites for
cybersex and cyberporn);
# Cyber-relationship addiction (over-involvement in online
relationships).
Sex addiction is also often accompanied by other sorts of addiction
such as drugs or alcohol.
Like all addictions, sex addiction is handled on many different
levels.
12-STEP RECOVERY PROGRAMME
Dr Winslow works with the Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous group here
and uses the 12-step programme to help his patients.
Based on the Alcoholics Anonymous model, the programme emphasises
the need for an addict to admit to powerlessness.
Then, after intense soul-searching and admission of wrong-doing,
they are encouraged to seek guidance from a higher power through
prayer or meditation.
For most addictions, total abstinence is the cure. But this does
not apply to sex.
'We have to teach the sex addict how to regain control of his
life.
'We make them understand what they are doing, be it using it as a
stress relief or for other reasons,' said Dr Winslow.
WHAT IS SEX ADDICTION?
LIKE an alcoholic unable to resist drinking, sex addicts are unable
to stop their self-destructive sexual behavior.
The majority grow up in families in which addiction already
flourished, including alcoholism, compulsive eating, and compulsive
gambling.
Most grapple with other addictions as well, but they find sex
addiction the most difficult to stop.
Sex addiction is defined as any sexually-related, compulsive
behavior which interferes with normal living and causes severe
stress on family, friends, loved ones, and one's work.
According to Dr Patrick Carnes who wrote the book, Out of the
Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction, there are three levels of
sex addiction:
# Level 1 - acting out, a pattern of out-of-control sexual behavior
which may include compulsive masturbation; indulging in
pornography; having multiple affairs; exhibitionism; dangerous
sexual practices; prostitution or going to prostitutes; casual sex
with strangers; compulsive sexual episodes, voyeurism and other
fetishistic behaviour;
# Level 2 - experiencing severe consequences due to sexual
behaviour and an inability to stop despite these adverse
consequences such as loss of job, loss of spouse and family, loss
of career opportunities, suicide attempts, exposure to Aids and
other sexually transmitted diseases;
# Level 3 - persistent pursuit of self-destructive behaviour where
even the understanding that the consequences of their actions will
be painful or have dire consequences will not stop them.
This is the 'must have sex by hook or by crook' stage which may
lead some to commit crimes such as molest and rape.
Said Dr Winslow: 'Most of the sex addicts I see are level 1 and 2
addicts.
'There are a couple of level 3 addicts who I see in the newspapers
now and then.'