The top ten reasons why I masturbate:
1. It feels good
Nothing feels better than busting a nut after a hard days work.
When it cums right down to it, masturbation feels great.
2. Its safer than real sex
With all of the STDs floating around today, who wants to take the
chance. The only thing that might happen from masturbation is a
rash, and thats only if you run out of St. Ives.
3. It helps you to improve your visualization skills
They say that if you want to achieve something, you have to
visualize it first. What better way to improve visualization than
to think about the girl you wish you were banging.
4. Its healthy
If you dont empty your man pouch every so often, your juices
perculate inside of you and come out in the form of anger or
wreckless driving. Isnt it just easier to crank one out?
5. Its good practice
Everyone knows that if you bust a nut in 30 seconds, you will
quickly gain a reputation as a minute-man, and no guy wants that.
Sometimes you just have to treat yourself to a nice, 45 minute long
self-massage.
6. To beat my old record.
I have been able to successfully hit the upper chest, but I have
never shot myself in the forehead (with jizz) before.
7. Because Im bored
Hey, if there is nothing better to do, why not.
8. Because Im addicted
What can I say, I love sex, even if it is with myself. Ive got a
monkey on my back people, and he needs to be spanked.
9. It feels good
Oh wait; I already used that one. Oh well, it deserves to be in
there twice anyway.
10. To pass time.
