On a lawnmower I had was a big label which read:
"WARNING WHEN MOTOR IS RUNNING- THE BLADE IS TURNING!"
We once bought a grocery store pizza and the instruction were on
the bottom, so we turned it upside down to see how long to cook it
etc., and low and behold the first instruction was DO NOT TURN
UPSIDE DOWN!
Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any
Bodily Orifice
My bathroom has inadequate ventilation and therefore, develops mold
spots in the lower corners. I attempted to purchase a cleaner
specifically designed to remove bathroom mold deposits. The
directions on the product label stated, "Only use in well
ventilated areas."
Seen on the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle: "Do not open here."
On a bottle of spray paint: "Do not spray in your face."
On a bottle of bathtub cleaner: For best results, start with clean
bathtub before use.
On a container of lighter fluid: WARNING: Contents flammable!
On a bottle of hand lotion: Warning: Starts healing skin on
contact.
On a box of household nails: CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May
cause irritation!
Microwave popcorn is packaged so that the directions cannot be read
unless you open the plastic and unfold it. Direction #1 is Remove
plastic.
On a television commercial that says it cleans dentures 4 times
better. Below in small print it said "Lab test: (their product) vs.
water.
On a television commercial I saw it said they their denture paste
was better than any other. BELOW IT, it said in small letters, vs.
using no adhesive.
I have a full-face motorcycle helmet with a giant arrow pointing to
the front. I can only guess that some idiot put the helmet on
backwards, jumped on a bike and hurt himself. This is to protect to
manufacturer from future lawsuits.
One day I went to a wall-mart out of state and I went to buy a blow
dryer when I read the warnings it said "DO NOT BLOW DRY IN
SLEEP"
Seen on the back of a drink bottle label: "Do not peel label
off."
On a Band-Aid box: "For serious injuries, seek medical
attention."
On a can of powdered infant formula: "Mix with water before
serving." Like I'm going to spoon it to my baby dry!
This stupid label was found on a can of Woolite carpet cleaner:
"Safe for carpets, too!"
This label was found on the BOTTOM of a box of glass ornaments: "Do
not turn upside down."
On a box of Frosted Cheerio's, the logo, "Tastes so good this box
never closes," is located just underneath another announcement: "To
close: place tab here."
On a plastic orange juice can: "100% pure all-natural
fresh-squeezed orange juice from concentrate."
I once saw an ad for some type of contest on a candy bar. The
wrapper said "No purchase necessary - Details Inside."
Directions for eating Lunchables Nachos: Dip chips in cheese and
salsa.
The golf carts on the course I worked at have warning labels
saying, "Not for highway use."
On Clorox Fresh Care: (for cleaning out odors from fabric) "Safe to
use in households with pets Warning: Fresh Care is NOT intended to
be sprayed directly on pets."
While working at a large medical center in the Midwest, a
construction worker was admitted with a large hammer sticking out
of his head. Seems he was in an altercation with another gentleman.
On the side of the hammer were the words, 'Use protective
eyewear.'
On the back of the Pilots seat on NATO AWAC Aircraft (E-3A), is a
sign that states: "Seat must be facing forward for take off and
landing."
I came upon a bottle of children's cough medicine stating "Caution:
May cause drowsiness; do not drive or operate heavy
machinery"
On the label of Sterno is a warning that says, "Do not use near
fire or flame." Check it out!
Seen on a container of salt:
Warning: High in sodium
Seen on computer instructions: Visit our site for further
instructions. http://www.pc.com/pc/instructions.htm
On a hose nozzle there was a warning that said: "Do not spray into
electrical outlet."
Seen on an industrial size washer in our local laundry
establishment was the (large lettered) sign: "Warning: Do not put
any person in this washer."
There is also a stroller on the market with the warning, "Remove
child before folding."
I saw a car ad depicting cars driving in the water with fins like
sharks. At the end of the ad in small letters it read: "Caution, do
not drive underwater"
