2nd Reading from the Office of Readings, 27 August 2007, the
Memorial of St Monica
From the Confessions of St Augustine
Let us gain eternal
wisdom
Because the day when she was to leave this life was drawing near
a day known to you, though we were ignorant of it she and I
happened to be alone, through (as I believe) the mysterious
workings of your will. We stood leaning against a window which
looked out on a garden within the house where we were staying, at
Ostia on the Tiber; for there, far from the crowds, we were
recruiting our strength after the long journey, in order to prepare
ourselves for our voyage overseas. We were alone, conferring very
intimately. Forgetting what lay in the past, and stretching out to
what was ahead, we enquired between ourselves, in the light of
present truth, into what you are and what the eternal life of the
saints would be like, for Eye has not seen nor ear heard nor human
heart conceived it. And yet, with the mouth of our hearts wide open
we panted thirstily for the celestial streams of your fountain, the
fount of life which is with you.
This was the substance of our talk, though not the exact words. Yet
you know, O Lord, how on that very day, amid this talk of ours that
seemed to make the world with all its charms grow cheap, she said,
For my part, my son, I no longer find pleasure in anything that
this life holds. What I am doing here still, or why I am still
here, I do not know, for worldly hope has withered away for me. One
thing only there was for which I desired to linger in this life: to
see you a Catholic Christian before I died. And my God has granted
this to me more lavishly than I could have hoped, letting me see
even you spurning earthly happiness to be his servant. What am I
still doing here?
What I replied I cannot clearly remember, because just about that
time five days later, or not much more she took to her bed with
fever. One day during her illness she lapsed into unconsciousness
and for a short time was unaware of her surroundings. We all came
running, but she quickly returned to her senses, and, gazing at me
and my brother as we stood there, she asked in puzzlement, Where
was I?
We were bewildered with grief, but she looked keenly at us and
said, You are to bury your mother here. I was silent, holding
back my tears, but my brother said something about his hope that
she would not die far from home but in her own country, for that
would be a happier way. On hearing this she looked anxious and her
eyes rebuked him for thinking so; then she turned her gaze from him
to me and said, What silly talk! Shortly afterwards, addressing
us both, she said, Lay this body anywhere, and take no trouble
over it. One thing only do I ask of you, that you remember me at
the altar of the Lord wherever you may be. Having made her meaning
clear to us with such words as she could muster, she fell silent,
and the pain of the disease grew worse.
http://www.universalis.com/800/i-readings.htm