this is what i wrote and im submitting to talkingcock.com see
you people like it or not (most importantly, whether it is
funny?)
In a desperate attempt to heighten Singaporeans' sense of awareness
regarding sexual education, the Gahmen recently announced that they
will be introducing a 'sexy' twist to our very familiar national
songs.
Political pundits agree that this campaign is seemingly borrowing
its momentum from the recent and dramatically controversial
makeover of POSB to becoming a national sperm bank
[http://www.talkingcock.com/html/article.php?sid=1436&mode=thread&order=0]
"Our national songs, like Count On Me Singapore, have always been
very very popular. But today, we must stress a whole new dimension
about patriotism. In reality, I believe that instead of simply
chanting, 'count on me, Singapore!' it makes more sense for
Singaporeans to actually moan, 'oh baby, cum on me, Singapore!' We
thus will entrench the 'Count on me to cum on her' mentality among
Singaporeans" said Minister of Procreation Lim Hng Kiang. "We
intend to unleash a nationwide campaign to drill the new versions
of familiar national songs into Singaporeans by playing the songs
in various radio stations and also on television programmes."
However, the move has angered many parents because of the explicit
sexual nature of the new national songs.
"Niao hiah! Nowadays this world very dirty. All Gahmen's fault.
Last time I used to masturbate while playing porn videos on my TV.
Now even kids can masturbate because of such saucy songs. How can
like that! What is our world coming to?" says a very worried
Tampenis citizen, Mr. Lim Peh Ka Li Kong.
However, Mr. Limp Hng Kiang brushed away such criticism, saying, "
Hng hng hng? Not true! Those parents seriously don't know how to
hng, baby." With that, Mr. Limp Hng Kiang proudly flash the lyrics
of the new versions of national songs.
CUM ON ME SINGAPORE
[Sing to the tune of Count of me Singapore]
by [email protected]
Kok Kok Klan
There is a new law for us to follow, just believe, just
believe
We must make love for Singapore, to make babies, to make
babies
Boys and girls, let's do our part, stand together, butt to
butt
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies
There is a need to know sex is good and ain't a sorrow
So let's drop our pants and do what Steve Chia died for
I ejaculated in your ass, it's a disaster Singapore shares
Stop oral and anal sex, oh horny you and me
To make babies, to make babies
Cum on me Singapore, cum on me and on my ass no more
Boys and girls, don't poke your butts, fark together, test your
luck
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies
Chorus:
Cum on me Singapore, cum on me Singapore
Cum on me and on my ass no more
(Repeated Chorus)
Cum on me Singapore Singapore
and more are coming...
