different language used between man&woman + interpretation

last SG · 2004-12-21T11:18:56+00:00

Hahaha women do that too :p "yadayadayada ... " "I'm not listening hon. Talk to me after Gilmore Girls."

jusgal SG

it depends on different situation. okie? not just like tat.

the guy can be the one really in fault mah

the Bear SG

yes.. but.. don't you see it... stop looking at "whose fault"... look at who the odds are stacked against...

a totally blameless dude could be lynched with the same reason...

the bottom line is: trust your guy... you chose him, you better learn to trust him..

don't use emotional blackmail against him.. don't tell him yes when you mean no.. don't tell him "it's all right" when it isn't...

because he trusts you totally, he's going to take those things face-value.. screw venus, screw mars.. this is planet earth...

when a guy says "nothing" he means it.. and if you cannot understand that, you cannot turn around and cry bitterly saying he does not understand you if you keep saying "it's all right" when you don't mean it..

after a while, he'll learn not to trust you... simply because you did not tell him simple truths...

and everything goes to hell after..

so, is it easier to be straightforward and call a spade a spade, or is it easier for a man to learn (and he will fail dismally) the "language" of women who do not say what they mean?

and back to "different situations", no matter what situations, the woman will prevail.. right or wrong... because, tragically men are hard-wired that way.. the battle may be won... but in the long run, the whole war may be lost...

jusgal SG

never mind lah.... Confused

M©+square SG

Alamak....walk away from discussion like that. Tsk tsk Confused

jusgal SG

u kenna from it badly

jusgal SG

most of the times, when a ger cry is cos she really sad abt it. not cos she wanna use it as a weapon. if u dun care abt the guy u won't cry. u won't even care. tears come naturally .....not like you wanna cry immediately u get the tears one. okie?

jusgal SG

wat u expect?
hurt has been done not just to one party but to both. both can be hurt

798 SG

how a guy will treat the gal before and after:

Mr. Green

M©+square SG

I understand what you mean....but do you understand wad we mean??? Rolling Eyes

It also has become evident that you're not really opening yourself to understand men's perspective and difficulties. How could guys share their views and be appreciated? Knowing that at least there are people who understood their position...
If every girls are to only look upon themselves as the only one suffering, victims, crying, emotionally hurt, sacrificing etc. (Thank God not all females are disillusioned)
I think there's no point in discussing the different language and interpretation both gender uses.
Why? Reason due to, you'll do selective reading and post reply in defense of female gender.

From your reply posts to bear's comments.
I don't think it's you understood his view. It was defensive from every reply i see from you(to stand by the female POV).
I would stand by bear's comments because those were very sound and neutral.

My comments about you being bias about guys was simply brushed off by - 'Nope lah'. My little portion at the back of my mind is right.

I suggest that you approach this topic with open mind.

Cheers

jusgal SG

i trying to let him know tat not all gers uses the tears as weapons.
come on....wat he say is only protecting guys right also.

i not saying the gers is really weaker ones. but tears is not a weapon. is just a form of expressions tat flows naturally

jusgal SG

ger: do u remember wat date is it today?

boi: my mother birthday or my dad?

ger: never mind.
(forget it u dun remember it. is the 2yr of the day we started dating)

boi: tell me lah. i really cannot remember.

ger: i going home now. no mood le.
( still dun remember Sad )

boi: u tired har. ok lah. i see u another day/

ger: fine. and walk away Mad

M©+square SG

Your reply:::

His (bear's) point is not about who's slapping who. You got it wrong.
What he's trying to present is the social expectations of different gender.
He means what a female can do doesn't mean that guys could do the same in the public.

Girl slap Guy = Guy did something wrong, girl so poorthing.
Guy slap Girl = Guy bas.tard, girl maybe wrong but still very poorthing.

Public's verdict: Guy is in the wrong.

Hence females have an 'advantage' and use 'it' to take advantage.
The Bear presented a general issue. A issue of social gender.

What you interprete = You tot he's talking about you.
Jusgal replied as if a personal issue.
We know that you won't slap those whom you love and of cos not even those whom you're not familiar with.
But how about those who took advantage??? Can you answer for them?

jusgal SG

Originally posted by M©+square:

His (bear's) point is not about who's slapping who. You got it wrong.
What he's trying to present is the social expectations of different gender.
He means what a female can do doesn't mean that guys could do the same in the public.

Girl slap Guy = Guy did something wrong, girl so poorthing.
Guy slap Girl = Guy bas.tard, girl maybe wrong but still very poorthing.

Public's verdict: Guy is in the wrong.

Hence females have an 'advantage' and use 'it' to take advantage.
[b]The Bear presented a general issue. A issue of social gender.

What you interprete = You tot he's talking about you.
Jusgal replied as if a personal issue.
We know that you won't slap those whom you love and of cos not even those whom you're not familiar with.
But how about those who took advantage??? Can you answer for them?
[/b]

i cannot answer but i was saying if is me. i won't. cos i dun go round slapping people.

then i also tell him. is not easy to cry whenever u wanna loh.

jusgal SG

i also say it depends on the circumstances also. and is between the two party. not on public verdict.

jusgal SG

my topics is on the words of speech not on actions. dun go off the topics. thanks

M©+square SG

Your reply:::

yes.. but.. don't you see it... stop looking at "whose fault"...

It's true that you don't see it.

What disturbs me deeply is your final reply to his post. I think it is a extreme disrespect not to reply him in objective to what he had said. Yet chose to brush off the fact....
Disgusted.....

M©+square SG

ger: Do you Love Me? (used cos she wanna hear him say yes)

guy: why must u keep asking the same question? (You don't trust me when i say yes? It makes me feel very unsettled when ever you ask this question. It's as if my YES is not enough, as if my confession and my words could not be true and truly satisfy you.)

M©+square SG

ger: dear, seems like we long time never go out le hor?
( means: shall we go out and dun stay in door?)

guy: We did. We got go out for meals mah.
(We did. Just that it's not as frequent as like what we used to do.)

jusgal SG

Again you're not answering him objectively. Try to open to his perspective. Don't you think he has a point? You made it seem like Bear is stating a personal attack.

<< LOOK i never say he making personal attack. i only say tat other won't be able to know exactly wat happen. so cannot assume. it could be the guy is really in fault or it could be mutual. Neutral

M©+square SG

Ok. I'll take it as that.
We shouldn't assume. Neutral

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